Parta: Conditions

Fear…

I shiver

excitement, tremble

she couldn’t touch me
the Angst

foreboding
to my habitual nature
the disease
I trap myself
and don’t release

its wicked pleasure
the thoughts that pay
too heavy to be true

they don’t do me justice

right or happy
excuse or integrity

running in circles
because I don’t choose to be
free

the universe won’t hear my plea
the longer I stall
I go nowhere
and nowhere becomes my destiny

frozen
words upon my lips
hung in midair

the breath that caught
in my throat

the meaning
I seem to choke upon

all in “misunderstood”

and part fragments
of phrases
that don’t link
together

but let me tell you this:

I intend to
make my dreams
come true

and hold onto
and expand
all the happiness I can…

when I wake up…

when I sober up…

-(-)-