Janitor’s Closet

a story by: An Eccentric Caffeine Addict

Author's Note: You're probably wondering why the stories called Janitor's Closet of all things. I actually wrote this story for my friend, we'll call him Bob. It's a fanfic on a relationship one of my other friend's in. Yes, maybe I should have submitted this on fanfiction but I wasn't quite sure what category it would go under. I really hope you enjoy it. For you, Bob. :love:

Have you ever wondered, what would happen if you were trapped with your boyfriend in the depths of a janitors closet. Would you accidentally mistake him for a mop? Or maybe you would trip and fall into some pile of cleaners and as you fell, you would drag him along, for the ride down. Then you would find yourself barricaded under his weight and the cleaners, which I presume wouldn’t be all that comfortable.

As you can probably see, I’ve thought this over. Over the past few weeks I’ve made up little stories and fantasies of how it would go if I did get locked in a janitor’s closet with my boyfriend.

Thing is none of them even came close to what really happened on that unusually warm, December day.

&&

I woke up to the sun shinning in my eyes, which for a morning person like me, was bliss. I yawned slightly and threw the covers off, getting up to completely open my curtains. With a swoosh, they were open and I was looking down at my backyard, which isn’t exactly one of those beautiful gardens that make you smile with joy but rather frown with discontent, so I stopped looking at the ugly thing and walked straight into my washroom.

To this day I don’t get how my hair turns into the raging tornado it is, when I wake up. The way it stuck out, almost perpendicular to my head, will forever remain a mystery. And the extremely complicated tangles, equally ambiguous.

Taking my eyes away from the impossibly, dirty mirror, I grabbed my toothbrush and was soon brushing my teeth away as I thought about what my boyfriend had told me last night over the phone. He had rambled on about some comic he loved and how his favourite female character reminded him of me.

Suddenly my eyes widened and my toothbrush fell right out of my mouth, landing with a clanking noise in the sink. I reminded him of a comic book character!?

I couldn’t believe it! That was probably the worst thing you could say to me. Comparing me to a fictional character, in a poorly plotted story was like taking me out on a Friday after I had just gotten back my math test, which I had failed. It was, in no simpler a word, bad.

If I suffered from any great mental disorder it was, insecurity. I could compare myself to a rock and prove to you that the rock was, by far, better than me. But this guy, the one I called my boyfriend, was comparing me to a silly, cape-wearing superhero. Was that why he ever asked my out, because I reminded him of his sweet comic book character? Was that all I was, the girl who filled the void of not having his beloved COMIC BOOK CHARACTER!?

Okay, so I overreacted but that’s another thing you should know about me. I overreact and not just to an extent where I think about the issue at hand over and over again but to the extent where I let my mind continue the little story forming in my head, so that by the end, it’s blown out of proportion to a unimaginable extent.

Of course I’d never, ever, ever, admit this to any ones face. It’s just an inner thought.

Currently I was in my house by myself; my mother having left for work already. I noticed that I had woken up unusually late, it was 6:30 a.m. and my usual time being around 5 or 5:30 a.m. And since I was alone, I screamed… loud. I’m quite sure my neighbours heard and thought that there was an escapee from the local asylum in the house, or at least that Ms. Highdown’s only daughter was, indeed, crazy.

Now let me tell you, when you scream with a mouth full of foamy toothpaste, it doesn’t go to well, for two particular reasons: a, you let half of it rush out of your mouth and b, the half that does run out, is now sliding down your neck, right down into your shirt. If you’re thinking that this was the part where I scream some more and jump around because there’s toothpaste running down my shirt, then you’re right. That’s exactly what I was doing, except as I was jumping, I fell.

And I refuse to tell you how.

&&

After I had gotten all cleaned up and ready to go to school, I ran downstairs to make myself a pot of coffee so that I could drown my sorrows into the mother of all caffeinated drinks. The coffee had just been made when I poured it into a mug and of course, drank it at once.

Yes I burned my tongue, and of course it hurt, that’s a very dumb question.

Now I was jumping around because my tongue hurt and in this process I banged my knee against one of the cabinets and I whimpered over that for a while. My wondrous Tuesday morning wasn’t very wondrous anymore.

All in all, after my many injuries, I walked out of my house, with my bag on my back and my iPod in my ears. As I walked to the corner of my street, where I would meet my friend Jane and then head off to school, only one thought running through my head. I was the replacement of a fictional character in a poorly plotted and badly illustrated comic book!

Oh, how I wished I had never decided to call him, because if I hadn’t this would never have happened, and my Tuesday would have gone as wondrously as I first began thinking it would. I was nearing the end of the street, when I saw Jane starring at me with incredulous eyes. My eyebrow arched in confusion. Why would she stare at me like I was some kind of ghost?

“Uh…Tammi, what’s with the pajamas?”

At this point I was confused and asked, “What are you talking about?”

“Did you look at yourself in the mirror this morning?”

“Of course I did! Otherwise my hair would be a tangled mess!” I replied with a smile, although I didn’t quite feel all that happy.

“Your hair is a mess and you look like a…hobo.” Her voice echoed with disappointment.

For the first time I looked down at myself since the morning and saw the odd attire I was wearing. “OH MY FUCKING GOD!” I screeched, almost dropping Wilson (my iPod).
“Yeah…” said Jane looking away, as if ashamed to even know me, then again if she were dressed like I was at that moment I would be ashamed to know me too.

Upon finally noticing what I was wearing I wanted to scream again. Of all the things I could have walked out wearing, why I chose to wear a scraggy looking brown shirt along with the most disgusting looking pants I owned, is beyond me. My left hand reached for my hair, and it was, just like Jane said, a tangled mess, as if I had never run a comb through it at all.

I stood there, thinking I should go back home, fix myself up and then go to school but that would mean I would most likely be late. Jane interrupted my thought stream, “You should go back home and clean out the flaws in your current…situation, unless you don’t mind everyone seeing you like that.” She pointed at my outfit and I winced.

“Yeah, I’ll go back…” I decided, “Come with me?”
It seemed she was pondering whether or not she should accompany me to my house and then wait as I dressed up properly. “Pleeaassee?” I begged, at the moment I would do anything to talk to someone about my disastrous day.

“Fine,” she said, giving into my plea.

We began walking in the other direction to my house, and I thought about how I should bring about the conversation of Joe’s comic book character.

“So, explain to me why you’re dressed like a hobo.”

“Oh, well you see, last night I called Joe and he told me about how I reminded him of a comic book character he liked, a female comic book character and I realized-” She cut me, off by finishing my sentence.

“This morning that he had said that and then you freaked out about it and have come to me, dressed like a deranged idiot.”

“That about sums it up, except I wouldn’t say that I’m dressed like a deranged idiot.”

“And people tell me I’m insecure.”

“What did you say?” I asked, having not quite caught what Jane had said.

“Oh, nothing, nothing that matters anyway.” She said, looking off to the side.

“Jane, what should I do!?” I whined, usually I would complain to my friend Laura but I couldn’t do that until second period and my problem was more right now, so Jane would have to do.

“Change your clothes and comb your hair.” She responded, giving me advice that I didn’t need.

“I know that! I mean about the Joe thing!” I whined some more, pointing out the obvious.

“Yeah I know what you mean and what I mean by my response is that you are once again blowing things out of proportion!”

“Nuh-uh!” I argued, although that’s a very bad come back.

She just looked at me, wearing a: you’re-pathetic look. “I am not pathetic!”

“Uh-huh.” Ha! Now she has the bad come back, that’s right Jane, you suck at come back’s just as much as I do. I smiled because now we were even, but she gave me a strange look which brought me back to the present complaining.

“Jannaaaeee!” I whimpered.

“Tell Laura about it, she’ll help you. The mere fact that I’m going to school late for you is something you should be grateful about.”

“You’re so mean!” I told her, in the best ‘you’re so mean’ voice I could muster at the moment.

“No, I’m not mean, you’re just irrational.” She accused. At least I’m taking it as an accusation.

“I am not irrational!” I retorted, stomping my foot for extra dramatics. She looked at me like I was a sad little lap dog and began walking the way remaining to my house.

I followed, and I acted as much like a five year old as I could, by ‘hmphing’ and glaring at her from behind. “Glaring at me isn’t going to help you out of you predicament.”

“Hmph!” I said as loud as I could and ‘hmphing’ cannot be done that loud.

“Whatever, we’re at your house. I’ll wait outside, go change into something less hobo like.” She ordered, as if she was the boss.

“You’re not the boss of me! I’ll do whatever I want.” I retorted in a smug voice.

“Fine, you do what you want and I’ll go to school.” She turned around and was going to walk away when-

“JANE!” I yelled, behind her.

“What?”

“…Stay.” I was defeated!

“…”

“Please…”

Cough.

“Pretty please, with a cherry on top.”

“I don’t like cherries.”

“You don’t?”

“No.”

“Oh…with a…um…blueberry on top?”

“I’ll stay, now go get changed.”

“Yay! I love you Jane!”

“Yeah, whatever.” I skipped up to my door and took my key out of my pocket and opened the door. I ran up the stairs, into my room and in less than five minutes was out, changed and ready to go…in less hobo-like clothes this time.

&&

I had made it to math class in time! Although I highly doubt my teacher would ever notice, seeing as she didn’t even seem to notice her unruly hair every morning; makes me wonder if she even looks in the mirror. But anyways that’s besides the point, I was in math class, a class I did not like very much and so I knew I was going to spend it worrying about Joe.

Of course I spent it worrying about him…It was a never ending circle of thoughts, did he like me because of his comic book character, if so, is that why he asked me out? I wanted to rip out my hair, or kill someone but I knew that was never going to happen.

Who was going to let me kill them? Well maybe those emo people, how they cut themselves because they’re all “depressed.” But let’s say I killed them, where would it get me, so I stayed off that path. Soon I would be in science, with Laura, she would help me! Or at least listen to me as I chewed off her ear.

It was times like these that got me in trouble.

“Tammi, what’s the answer to the problem?” It was a faint gong in the back of my mind; I didn’t bother paying any great attention to it.

“Tammi?” There it was again, how annoying.

“Tammi!” I jumped out of my thought and looked around like I had awoken suddenly from a bad dream, not that knowing your boyfriend thought you were the substitute for a comic book character was less then any nightmare I had had but even so.

“What!?” I said, trying to focus back onto the world of math.

“I asked if you knew the answer to the problem.” It was my teacher.

“Ohh, um yeah, what question?” I asked, flipping through my notebook.

“5, b.” She answered in her squeaky, little voice. Well to me it was squeaky….

“Oh, it’s 32.05 meters,” I answered, thanking God that I had done the question for homework.

“That’s correct.” She smiled at me; I smiled back, although mine was less genuine.

I have to pay more attention if I keep dazing off into my own world she’ll catch me not paying attention and that won’t go to well…

I starred at the board, watching her as she explained a question to everyone wondering once again back to Joe….math class was going to be very long.

I had resorted to watching the clock tick by; as every minute passed I would silently hurray! When would the long painful period end and when would I get out to talk to someone about my PROBLEMS. My class was filled with a bunch of people I did not particularly take too. They were just people, who were there.

It was getting closer and closer to the end of the period, meaning it was getting closer and closer to me getting out, to second period where I would do no work at all and explain my situation to Laura. Yes, she would listen, she always did.

I would be saved! At least to some extent. I settled back to starring at the teacher, who had just wrote down today’s homework and was now taking her seat to let us get to work. I flipped to the correct page in my textbook and began to do a problem. My mind drifted off to the conversation…

“Yeah so I was reading Xtreme again and I noticed how much you were like Fiona.”

“Oh, isn’t she your favourite character?” I asked.

“She is, I showed her picture to you on Wednesday.”

“Uhh…you did?”

“Yes,” His voice settled into his disappointed tone. “The one with the red hair, has the letter ‘X’ on her outfit.”

“Oh! Her, yeah, she’s cool I guess.” I replied, not really into his comic.

“Well, she’s a lot like you, you remind me of her when I get you fooled.” He laughed. I wasn’t paying attention. Zelda was more important then his comic book character and her characteristics that seemed to match mine.

How could I have been so STUPID as to not notice that! It was just then that the bell rang. I jumped in my seat, surprised to hear it. I heard a snicker from behind but that hardly mattered right now. What mattered was that I had to get to room 234. I grabbed my things, stuffed them into my bag and ran out the door. I heard my teacher telling my to slow down…of course I didn’t listen.

I was at the door, waiting, searching for the first sign of Laura’s brown hair. Oh, where is she!? Where is she!

“Hey Tammi!” I heard the familiar voice of the one I was searching for. I turned around and saw her smiling at me and then I cried:

“LAURA! THANK-GOD YOU’RE HERE!”

She stared at me blankly, as everyone else who was standing anywhere close to me.

“Um…you’re welcome…” She said trying to make sense of my outburst.

“Laura, Laura, I have to tell you SOMETHING!”

It dawned upon her what I was getting so rowdy about. “Oh…something happen with Joe again?”

“Yes! He...he…A comic book character!” I grabbed her by the shoulders and looked at her with all my hurt. I mean I wasn’t exactly hurt but it was better to let her think that.

“Comic book character?” She questioned, eyebrow raised.

“Yes, Fiona, she’s from Xtreme, I mean what kind of dumb name is that!”

“No better then half the comics I can name but go on.” She replied.

“Ladies if you’d like to come into class.” I looked behind me and saw my English teacher looking back with a stern look. I never really noticed how odd her nose was until then.

Laura walked in, looking back to get me to start moving too. We walked in and took our seats in the back corner of the class. Mrs. Geser began talking about Macbeth and me, about Joe.

“Okay so we were talking last night on the phone because I got bored and though I should call him, right, and we had a pretty much normal conversation, but then this morning I realized that he had compared me

to a comic book character! Fiona! Do I look like a Fiona to you?”

“No…” She said trying not to upset me further. “Okay and what exactly did he say? Rather, what did you say?”

“Um..well I was playing Zelda…so…I sorta wasn’t paying much attention to what he was saying at the time.”

She gave me her ‘no wonder you idiot’ look and then added, “That explains a lot. You probably misheard him or something and now you’re freaking out about it.”

“Nuh-uh! I know he said I reminded him of her!”

“Okay, so tell me exactly what he said.”

I explained to her the entire conversation and she nodded here and there letting me know she was paying attention.

“Tammi, turn around and pay attention.” Mrs. Geser said. Gah! Stupid teacher!

“How about we continue this at lunch?”

“No, NOW!” I whispered in my most pleading whisper.

“Fine, well from what you’re telling me, it’s not like he said he thought you were a replacement for his Fiona, as you keep putting it.”

“Laauuurrraa!” I whined, giving her a crybaby face look. “It’s not fair!”

“I’m sure you could compare him to some comic book character too, so really there’s no reason to get upset.”

“But, but, but! Fiona!!!” I complained.

“Fiona’s a comic book character she can’t replace you. And unless he’s some weird obsesser who has a giant cardboard cutout of her whom he pretends is real you have nothing to worry about. Actually you do…Your safety might be at risk…At which I wouldn’t want you dating him, neither would Kyle or any of your other friends.”

“ OMG! He has a cardboard cutout!” I cried.

“No...I said if he does, not that he does. It’s Joe, I can confirm that he doesn’t.” She said.

I had started to hyperventilate. Just thinking about the fact that he might love Fiona that much made me afraid, it would mean that he didn’t even like me. I was truly just his Fiona replacement. My brain seemed to have melted right then and I dropped my head down into my arms on my desk.

“Tammi…you’re overreacting again.” She told me.

“He loves Fiona that much!” I cried.

“No, he’s dating you for you not because you’re a Fiona replacement. Now stop worrying and do some work before Geser comes and sees your page blank. She’ll get all pissed off and uptight. I swear she’s on a constant PMS.”

It was a known fact that Laura hated Mrs. Geser, even those who didn’t know Geser, knew Laura hated her. Made me wonder if Mrs. Geser knew.

“Tammi, at lunch we’ll come up with a solution to your predicament, for know get some of your work done before Geser blows it on you.”

“Fiinnneee.” I drawled, getting up out of my slouch. I sighed and began answering the questions about Macbeth she had written on the board. I looked up at the clock, lunch time was nearly here, only twenty minutes and in that time I would have my work done and out of the way.

&&

The lunch bell rang and I jumped out of my seat waiting impatiently for Laura to get out of hers. She was packed in about a minute and we left for South cafe.

“Don’t worry, we’ll think of something.” She assured me.

I simply whimpered.

As we were walking I saw Joe down the hallway, I immediately grabbed Laura by the shirt and pulled her to a side, smacking hard into a door.

“OW! What the hell was that for?” She asked rubbing her right arm.

“I saw Joe.”

“Dear God…What, now you can’t even say hi to him?”

“He compared me to his Fiona! Of course I’m not going to say hi.” I answered, sniffling slightly.

I looked at the door we were standing in front of, the little plaque on the front read, Janitor’s Closet. Laura was reading it too.

“Hmm…” Her face showed a thought process going on in her head.

“What?”

“What, what?” She asked back.

“Why were you ‘hmming?’” I asked.

“Oooh, nothing!” She smiled. I started at her blankly wondering why she was smiling at a time like this. “Joe has third lunch right?”

“Yeah…”

“Okay. Let’s get going.”

“O….kay…” I trailed. She had left me by the Janitor’s Closet, so I followed.

&&

We had reached the noise of South cafe, and I had whined the entire trip. Laura on the other hand had worn a smile on her face, I kept asking her why but she would always give me the same answer, “It’s nothing.”

How could she smile at a time like this? I was being compared to a comic book character! It was the most devastating thing in the world.

We went to our usual spot in the cafe, close to the vending machines which I had taken the time to name one day.

“Oh look, it’s Joe.” Laura pointed out. My eyes shot up in the direction of her head and there he was, walking right towards me, with his right hand in his pocket and his bag slung over his left shoulder. “It’s nice that he can take the time to come say hi, isn’t it Tammi?” Laura teased.

“NO! Not right now at least! I’ve got to hide!” I shrieked.

“He’s already seen you.” She pointed out.

“So?!!?” I spluttered.

“So, there’s no point in you hiding, he’ll just look for you.”

I sobbed, not in reality of course, that would be SO lame, and Tammi doesn’t do lame.

He was getting closer and closer and I was getting ready to sprint across the cafeteria.

“Hey,” he said, giving me his usual facial expression. No smile or even smirk for that matter.

“Hi,” I croaked back. I wanted to hide underneath the table or a rock, just crawl up underneath it. Ah, that would be nice.

“Hi Joe! Have a seat,” Laura exclaimed, she sounded too happy.

“Hi,” he replied back, taking a seat right next to me. How could Laura do this to me!? I thought she loved me, but apparently I was wrong. I felt like strangling her.

“Oh, guys I forgot my English binder in class, wanna come with me to get it?” She inquired of me.

I sat there staring at her blankly. I though I had seen her put her binder in her bag….But anything to get me away from Joe.

“Sure!” I answered, happy that I could get away from him.

“Joe, would you like to accompany us, or rather Tammi?” She giggled at the last part. Now I really wanted to strangle her, to the point where she died.

“Yeah, why not,” he said. I felt like my entire skeleton had dissolved and I was going to fall to the ground in a pile of mush.

“Alright, let’s go!” She bounced out of her seat and was already off, leaving me to walk behind with Joe….

WHY!? AHHH! What was I going to say…It would be long amounts of awkward silences, with a few words being passed here and there.

“So, how are you?” He asked me, casually.

“I’m fine, perfectly fine.” I smiled back; this was going to be a long day. “You?”

“I’m good.”

There was a silence after that and it seemed like it was going to stay. I looked up in front of me and saw Laura bouncing a bouncy ball. I wanted a bouncy ball! That is soooo not fair! She doesn’t even deserve a bouncy ball.

We were out of South now and just walking silently as if we weren’t going out. Laura was still ahead of us.

“So, how was your day so far?” He asked trying to strike conversation again.

“Oh, it was good.” I answered, my answers remaining vague. “Yours?”

“Well English was fun, did just about nothing in class but philosophy was long and boring.”

“Oh, well I guess you shouldn’t have taken it then.”

“Yeah, it’s too tedious.”

“Oh…,” I trailed.

“Hmmm,” I said back. It was more just a way to keep the conversation going but it didn’t work; we fell back into our silence.

Now we were climbing the stairs of North, Laura no where in sight. “Umm, where did Laura go?” I questioned.

“Oh she’s probably already at the top of the stairs or something.”

“C’mon guys! You’re so slow.” Laura screamed from the top of the stairwell.

“There she is.” Joe commented.

“Yeah, ‘there she is’” I repeated.

As we got to the top, Laura had already gone and we followed. Now we were walking down the same hallway where Laura was ahead of us, near the place where I had pulled her to hide. She seemed to be looking for something. That’s when I noticed she had lost her bouncy ball.

“Guys I lost by bouncy ball!” She whined. “Help me find it!” We reached her and saw the closet door was open.

“Maybe it went into there?” I asked.

“I dunno, can you check?”

“Uh...I guess.” I replied, walking into the dark closet.

“Joe maybe you should help her, I’ll look out here.”

“Uh…o..kay.” He appeared to hesitate but followed me into the closet. We were both in the closet now, looking blindly for a bouncy ball.

Suddenly the only light we had received from the hallway was gone. I straightened out, “Um, Joe what happened?”

“Oh the door just closed, I’ll open it.”

“Yeah, we can’t exactly find the bouncy ball with absolutely no light.”

His hand went to the doorknob and he twisted it both ways. It didn’t open. .God.

“It…it…won’t open.” He remarked.

“It won’t?!” I said, trying not to think that we were trapped in a closet together.

“No.”

“LAURA!?!” I screamed.

We heard a muffled voice from the other side of the door. “Excuse me what are you doing here?”

“Looking for my bouncy ball…” That was Laura’s voice.

“You can do that when the hallway is inbound,” the other voice said.

“No!” I yelled again.

“What did you say?” The other voice said.

“I didn’t say anything,” Laura told her.

“Well then, get out of the hallway.”

“But, my-”

“You can get the bouncy ball on your own time.” I heard footsteps but soon they were gone.

“WHY DIDN’T YOU BANG ON THE DOOR!?” I shrieked at Joe.

“I…I completely forgot to, between your screams and the teachers stupidity.”

“You do realize that we’re locked inside a janitor’s closet for an entire period, unless the janitor comes to this particular closet anytime soon.”

“Yes.”

“…”

“…”

&&

So that was that, we were locked inside a janitor’s closet…it doesn’t get any sadder then that….My fantasy was becoming a reality, the only thing that made me afraid was what if any of my theories would too.

A silence had settled in from Joe’s last ‘yes.’ Three minutes and counting, how do I know, I’ve been mumbling 1 Mississippi, 2 Mississippi, 3 Mississippi etcetera…Yes I happen to know that’s a very sad way to pass time in a janitor’s closet, seeing as I am the one in the closet but what do you expect? Me, to jump on him so I could take this perfect chance in the dark to rape him; pft, like that would ever happen.

“Sooo…” He began, trying to start a conversation since we had spent the last 3minutes and 34 Mississippi’s, I mean seconds, in silence. I had been standing in the same position, twiddling my thumbs wondering when we would get out; when I would get away from my single nullifier.

I sighed, “Soo...” I repeated after him although my ‘so’ seemed to be of the shorter variety. He smacked his lips and we remained in our silence. It was then that the darkness of the closet hit me…I couldn’t see a thing apart from the tiny crack of light at the bottom of the door, which didn’t exactly illuminate the closet.

“Um, can you check for a light switch?” I asked him, trying to find a wall myself.

“Sure” He agreed. I blindly waved my hand in front of me to find a wall. I did feel something but for a wall, it was awfully strange. (A/N: I refuse to describe this because you’ll take it in the wrong way.)

“Um, can you get your hand off my face…There’s already no light; you covering my eyes is not helping.” He said. I went red in the face, luckily he couldn’t see! I slowly took my hand off his face.

“I...I’m sorry!” I croaked.

“It’s okay, how about you check to your right; I’ll check your left.” He ordered. When had be become in charge?

“Uh, right, got it.” I shuffled over to the right only to hit something hard. I screamed out, “OW! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS!?” I immediately grabbed my foot for it was pounding hard and then toppled over because I lost my balance.

As I fell crashing to the ground, well maybe not crashing but it makes it sound so much more dramatic, I flailed my hands in front of me to grab onto something, for I did not want to fall into a pile of cleansers. I did grab something…but it wasn’t exactly sturdy. Next thing I knew I had fallen hard into something really pokey. Yes I have great description skills and I know you sooo want them.

“Ow.”

“Are you okay?” Joe’s voice asked.

“I’ve fallen into something that’s poking me hard in the back, what do you think?”

“You’re not okay.”

“No shit!”

“Here let me help you.”

There was a moment of awkward silence. “Um, are you helping me yet?”

“Well I have extended my hand…”

“…”

“Yes I know you can’t see it.”

I wanted him to see my expression but he couldn’t, but maybe if I mustered it hard enough he could feel it through my aura.

“Extend your hand, maybe it’ll hit mine,” he said, thinking of some way to get me up.

I extended my hand, it hit nothing. Suddenly I felt something grasp my hand and yank me so that I could get up. I felt my body rise off of whatever it was that was underneath me…most likely cleansers of some sort.

“Thank-you.” I said, after I was on both feet again.

“You’re welcome.” He replied. “Are you okay? Break anything?”

“I would have told you if I had broken something.”

“True.”

“Have you found a light switch yet?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“…”

Once again, there was an awkward silence.

“Well after you fell I was paying attention to you, not the light switch.”

“Shall we continue our search for a light switch?”

“I don’t think there is one.”

“You don’t?”

“Yes, I don’t, must we repeat each other?”

“No, we don’t have to repeat each other.” I smiled, mocking him.

I heard a sigh of aggravation from him and that was it. Yet another silence fell and this time I wasn’t going to count Mississippi’s. I would count Hippopotamuses.

&&

Alright so a total of seventy-eight Hippopotamuses had passed when Joe finally broke the silence.

“Don’t you find this particularly odd?”

“What? The fact that of all people, you and I are locked in a janitor’s closet? Not at all.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s you and I. I’m sure you’ve been in situations much weirder and worse.”

There was a moment of silence and then he responded, “Yes, yes I have.”

I rolled my eyes and sighed, beginning to wonder when I was leaving the closet. I had lost count of my Hippopotamuses, which meant that I had to start again, so that I could figure out how much time we spent in the confines of the small closet. It didn’t occur to me then that I could have just looked at my watch when I stepped out into the light once I got out of the closet. Which, if you haven’t yet gotten what I mean, is that when I did get out of the closet, I had counted A LOT of Hippopotamuses.

&&

It goes without saying that in the next four hundred or so Hippopotamuses, nothing of any great importance happened other then Joe coughing a few times here and there and me spazzing out and practically breaking down the door.

But that’s not that important.

What happened next on the other hand…is something that I can’t even explain.

&&

Now if you’re the squeamish type and will freak out (just like me) at the slightest mention of anything with the words “kissing”, “touching” and “cuddling” in it, then I warn you now, don’t read on ahead. Instead skip a few paragraphs.

Or go to the next squiggly thing that the author of this piece of literature is using to divide some of the…um…strange periods of time in my day.

&&

Seven hundred and twelve Hippopotamuses, seven hundred and thirteen Hippopotamuses—

I saw Joe taking off his jacket. Why was he taking off his jacket? OH MY GOD!?! He wouldn’t rape me would he!? Insert the asterisks that inform you that I am hyperventilating.

“Why are you taking off your jacket?” I croaked.

“Uh...because I’m hot.”

“Hot?” My eyes widened.

“Yeah, the closets quite stuffy.” He explained.

“Oh.”

“Tammi?”

“WHAT!?” I had snapped out of my lucid theories.

I think Joe was giving me a “what the fuck!?” look because he didn’t say anything for at least seven Hippopotamuses.

“Are you okay?” He finally said.

“Yup! I mean it’s just a dark closet with cleansers in it, which seem to be very pokey. Because when I fell into that pile of cleansers it really hurt. I never thought cleansers could be so harmful. Well I did think they could be harmful because in science we learned that they were when we learned about chemicals and stuff in chemistry. Did you know that there were like a hundred different elements? I didn’t, so I was like that’s so cool! And most of them are flammable so if I could get some I would probably set something on fire, like that time I burned my friend’s cottage! I really didn’t mean too, but it just sorta happened. I mean the—”

I felt Joe’s lips crash down onto mine. My eyes widened and I honestly didn’t know what to do or say. I mean not that I could say anything because he was blocking the way for my words to come out but my mind was completely blank. Imagine that, Tammi, speechless.

“Mrrfffrrr,” I mumbled. It didn’t sound like anything in the English language. Maybe it was German?

His hand wound up at my cheek and I took a step back, still not quite sure what was going on. His other hand took my wrist in hand and pulled me closer, my eyes starring at his face the entire time. Or at least where I thought his face was.

Was I…making out with Joe? WAS I!? If yes then, YAY!!!

If not, then what was I doing? I’ll just go with the previous theory.

I allowed myself to take a step forward, now returning Joe’s kiss. I was out of my, “oh my God, what’s going on” phase. I closed my eyes and we kissed for at least a hundred and fifty Hippopotamuses. Then he broke off, panting for breathe. I found it…kinda hot. I NEVER SAID THAT! AHHH!!

Alright so maybe I did say that….I mean I was panting too. It was a long kiss. And I didn’t get much chance to breathe.

Now I leaned forward and kissed him, and he surprised me yet again. He was softly sucking on my bottom lip. My free hand quivered and my eyes snapped shut. His hand travelled slowly to my neck and rested there. I could feel the Goosebumps forming all over my body and the sparks running down my back.

I laced my fingers into his and we stood there, in the stuffy janitors closet for I don’t know how many Hippopotamuses, but every one that passed my heart quickened it’s pace and I felt my face getting redder and redder. Maybe I was more to Joe than the replacement of his not so beloved comic book character.

We parted lips for a few seconds catching our breathes.

“Tammi?”

“Yeah?”

“You’re really too awesome.”

I giggled. “You too.”

He leaned over, kissing me gently, my hand somehow wound up resting over his hand, holding it in place. If this moment could have lasted forever, then I don’t think I would have minded much. (Again, I DID NOT SAY THAT.)

I pushed down onto his kiss, deepening it. His tongue licked my bottom lip, sliding from one corner of my mouth to the other.

The sparks doubled. The Goosebumps felt like they would never end. But my hand remained firm, resting upon his.

I could feel my heart beat fast, ready to pop out of my chest. My lips parted and his tongue slipped into my mouth. My eyes shot open. I couldn’t believe this was all happening.

Before I knew what was going on, I moaned. Knowing Joe, he probably smirked but I didn’t care. His hand squeezed mine comfortingly and the kiss lasted a few more seconds before I pulled away. My face was red, redder than red, probably radish red if not beet red.

We didn’t say anything, the moment passed away in silence and then the door opened.

&&

Well all the important parts already happened. Do I have to tell you the rest? Because the expression on the janitor’s face wasn’t exactly welcoming or sincere. She seemed quite disturbed, shocked and disgusted at the same time.

“It’s not what you think!” I screamed; taking my hand off of Joe’s who took his hand off of my neck. We both turned to look at the janitor, who kept staring at us like we were animals in a zoo.

I was just happy the janitor was a she and not a he. Well maybe she was actually a he, you never know.

“Really now?” She smirked. I didn’t like that smirk of hers. It was creepy. And not, “I caught you doing perverted things,” creepy but rather, “Ooo! Can I join you?” creepy. Okay so maybe I’m over exaggerating.

“Actually, we got locked inside the closet and when we tried to get out the door wouldn’t budge. Nor did anyone come to help us out. We’ve spent most of our lunch locked inside the closet so thank-you very much for coming and getting us out. And we’re very sorry about any messes we’ve made in your closet.” Joe explained and apologized. It was amazing how he could go from being a complete asshole to a complete gentleman.

He squeezed my hand and then pulled me out of the closet and we stepped into the light of the hallway, after the long minutes spent in the dark closet. The janitor spun around but we were running down the hallway towards the stairs and right before the door closed all we heard was, “Hey you!” fade away into the backs of our minds.

And all I remembered at the end of this wondrous Tuesday was how we jumped the last few steps of the stairwell and ran out the doors that led to the school grounds. Everything afterwards just faded away into nothing.

The End

And let me remeber all those good times,

spent admist your love and my life.