Close and –click, click- lock the door

Slow tread, stairs, heavy heart,

Tang of mint and water running,

(Screaming suppression) my forced thought

I’d forgotten just how (feeling) frozen and detached is pain

And cannot scrub away the burdened taste of your kisses.

Both our ironclad dreams refuse to fail (and cannot merge)

Unable to avoid wounding you, how can you not see that this is

(And more than I would like to admit) hurting me?

Impossible (?) changes, facing destruction

I cannot breathe without thinking, cannot decide illogically,

(I cannot alter myself) and something must give.

I’d forgotten just how cold and distant feeling can be

(I cannot go on killing you);

It’s the haunting portrayal of your Hell (my Hell, my eyes)

In actions I cannot always deny you

These sickly-twisted words somehow given meaning

(“Never” – “Forever” – “I LOVE YOU”)

And your defiance of God, self-homicidal dreaming

(Don’t create of me a goddess)…

And I cannot scrub away the burdened taste of your kisses

– Now mint-edged – or the imprint of your heart in my palm.