Teenage Infatuation

By

Rating: PG

Warnings: Just mentions of drugs.

Summary: A recollection of a girl with no experience who had fallen in love for the first time. You know how that is. First person POV.

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I met him at work. My first job ever and I sit there with nothing to do. I was bagger at grocery and so was he. Well, I guess that’s a lie. He actually was in my English class for a while. But he left it and I never had spoken to him before. So I truly met with him at work.

I remember one day, he sat across from me in the bagger break room, just staring. It made slightly uncomfortable. I mean, what guy would be interested in me?? I have limp ugly brown hair, these cold gray-blue eyes, the breasts of prepubescent girl, huge thighs and butt and scars everywhere.

But he just stared, like I was the place to look. He joked with friends and horsed around. When he left to work, so did I. I remember like an hour later I sat back down and let others get tips. And in he comes, cheeks flushed and he stares at me again. But this time he sat next to me, and when I say next to me, I mean if he had been any closer, he would have been in my lap. He turned to me, looks me straight in the eyes and asks, “Are my eyes dilated?” What kind of question is that?? I laughed and told him, “Yeah.” He leaned in closer and I swear I thought he was gonna kiss me, but leaned suddenly and next thing I know he drooled on the floor. I laughed it off and sat back too.

Just as I was readying to leave, he stopped him a gentle hand on my upper arm and asked if he could have my number. I smiled softly, but inside I was dancing with joy. Now you must understand that this is the first time any guy asked for my number, so it was I big deal. I wrote it quickly on the back of his hand and left waving and smiling.

You know, how in movies or TV shows, guys never call back quickly, they leave the girl hanging. Well, that did not happen to me.

He called the same day. My mom picked up the phone. And damn, she pretended she was me. Flirting and everything, she quickly handed to me. I think he may have said something inappropriate cause my mom blushed a bit. The call wasn’t romantic in the traditional sense but it was sweet and sounded so shy, with his friend in the background laughing every time he said a sweet little comment. But I fell in love with him in that one conversation.

The weekend had ended and school quickly came. But I remember that Monday. I stood talking with a few friends (though honestly, I only had a few) he came up beside and stood there saying nothing just looking shy examining his shoes. I said, “Well, guys, I’ll see 2nd, I gonna go to my locker.” And i left. Not two moments later, he followed the cue I had given. We talked for a minute and I promised to skip my Ta class to visit his ceramics class. He walked off to his class and stayed at my locker.

Jess came over and smiled at me knowingly, one eyebrow arched in question. I just laughed and went on my very merry way.

I spent very little time with him after. And then I moved away. My dad had received orders to Colorado Springs and we left. I never even said good bye.

Nearly a year later, I was working at a totally different place and talking with a pregnant woman with a lot of experience and knowledge in drugs and gangs. I told her about Ryan and the little contact I had with him. She laughed and told me he was “tweaking” when he flirted with me. I stood there stupidly. I am not the kind girl who knows drugs or their symptoms. I asked what the hell kinda drug is tweak? Meth was her simple but painful answer. Painful, for me. The first guy I liked that liked me back was on drugs when he hit on me. I don’t flirt much any more. But I sometimes think. If I had stayed in Alaska, would I have become ensnared in his dangerous lifestyle? Would I have become a drug user too?

I don’t think too much cause it hurts. But I thank the powers that be that I left.