I'd turn back if I could, but the road is blocked

With my shadow and my phantoms

So really I can't, my dear.

I try to make it better, I try to make it more clear

But I always lie in the end, like a little girl who doesn't understand.

Why do you keep trusting?

Why do you keep those hopeless dellusions?

If the pain always comes to grab you by the hand

And destroy all it can.

Why do you keep fighting?

Why do you keep your arms ready and your mind sharp?

If you end up losing something else

That you never noticed that was there all along.

I'm starting to see

Finally and painfully.

That hell has no end, just some ocassional time-outs.

I feel guilty and sadistic, so cynical.

I'd beg for forgiveness if I didn't know

It would never come, because we're long past that state of danger.

I don't want to lose your trust in me,

although I hardly think you ever trusted anyone.

But there's always the fact, just that one random fact

That even I don't trust myself sometimes

Well, not around you, anyway.

You should be inside my head sometimes, I'm telling you it's scary.

I would make you wish you've never knew me at all

But still I can say that I'm quite charming, when I want to.

That's how I know

Some smiles are just lies

Even the honest ones

How can you be tactless

And at the same time dishonest?

And I try to explain myself

But my words slip away, like the sand that I can hold in my closed fist.

The lies become fluent in my head these days

The feeling I'm trying to express is as simple as this

No truth is ever simple

Because all truths have lies in them