She said she'd wait, and it meant the world to me. I never loved anyone as much as I loved her. The only regret I had about my Mission was leaving her, and the possibility of losing her. She was everything to me, and I wanted to be with her forever, but I couldn't force her to convert. I didn't want to; I wanted her to want to. I knew we were both young, but so were my parents when they got married. It's God's will for us to marry and teach our children His way. I was certain that she would see His truths, and she would realize why I was giving Him the next two years. She would understand, and we would live our lives as one.

But why the fuck should anything work out the way I want it to? That school trip was the test to see how I'd fair without her, and it was terrible. The whole week I felt like less than half of a person. If we hadn't promised each other before, I would have cut myself again to ease the pain. After everything I did for her, she was perfectly fine without me. I texted her at the end of the week-

"This sux. Wanna just get married as soon as I get back from my Mission?"

She never replied. It was a text; even if she was out of the service area when I sent it, she should have received it when she got back to the city.

I think deep down I knew that it was only a matter of time for us when she asked to make out relationship "open." She didn't cheat on me, but I'm pretty sure she had her eye on him before I left. Thy hooked up pretty quickly, and it turned into something more than a fling. I finally could not take it anymore, and my next letter broke things off between us.