She stood a great deal higher than the rest of the group, it’s not that she was extremely tall or anything, it was just that she felt as if she was some how above the rest of the group. Her radiant brown eyes stared out to meet the crowd before her, if any of them would have been closer to her they would have seen the small tears pooling at the creases, but as it were she was safe from their scrutiny. She was beyond terrified and she could feel her emotions radiating off of her body; her long slender fingers were shaking to the point where she could hardly keep a hold of the few notes she had brought with her, goose bumps were forming all over her not-so-well defined arms, and she was sure that she could see some guy in the crowd staring right at her breast, she didn’t think they were much to brag about, just average sized, but from the way the guy was staring he must have been enjoying the view.

Without even thinking about it she blew another piece of hair out of her face, she had tired to pull her short brown hair into a ponytail, but as usual the unruly mass refused to be tamed. She had never really given a speech before to a large crowd, and the circumstances for her debut speech were not exactly ideal. She could feel the weight of all that had happened in the last few days pushing down upon her, she wasn’t always this weak of a person, it just seemed that as of late she couldn’t handle the stress anymore.

She could still remember being a stronger person; she could still remember actually wanting to leave her own home everyday. She remembered putting on her favorite red dress, knowing perfectly well how she looked in it. With her long legs sticking out inches below the hem of the dress, ending with whatever heels she was able to find in the clutter of her apartment. In those days she always wore make up, even though she had been told she didn’t need it, she had a sort of natural beauty, with her long eyelashes and rosy cheeks, she wasn’t sexy but she was definitely beyond just plain cute. But it was never her looks alone that got her all the attention; there was something more about her that always managed to turn heads. Her confidence was enough to light any room and she was able to keep her manner under a tight enough leash so that it only insulted the tightest of people.

Her whole outlook on life, and practically her whole world had come crashing down on her in just one night, her not quite sexy red dress had been stuffed into the back of the closet only to be replaced by a long black skirt and an equally non-descript black shirt. Her once beauty was pushed behind her new self. She became a completely different person, she threw away her make up, and some how found a way to down play that natural beauty she once reveled in. Her unruly hair was that way because she no longer cared, she no longer cared to press her clothes every morning, and she never did her nails anymore. It’s easy to say that she had just given up on physical appearances but anyone who knew her before everything would know that she was a completely different person. She stopped carrying herself in the same manner; she slumped a little more when she walked, and she talked a little more quietly then she once did.

Sandra was a different person now, a person who no longer cared about her life. She was no longer the sassy girl who stunned a room as she walked in; she was something all together different. It was as if Sandra had died with her father that night. The girl that was once stunning with her confidence was now dowdy with weakness, but for some reason she was able to find comfort in her new meek state.