Why do I lose my mind sometimes,

everything is so clouded

my thoughts jumbled into one mass,

swirling around in my mind,

my emotions mixed in somewhere,

I'm afraid of what I am,

I'm afraid of who I might become,

I don't want to be angry,

I don't want to be violent,

it's in my nature,

like a wired in law,

I fight it like no other,

I push the urges down,

down to the depths,

but sometimes they reemerge,

show to me their ugly face,

sending shivers up and down,

I'm ashamed of those urges,

I try to conceal them from all,

I replace them with patience,

I replace them with calmness,

I tie them down to the floor,

never to let them go,

but sometimes, only sometimes,

they manage to get free,

they wreak havoc in my life,

they tear me apart,

and I'm ashamed of them,

I'm ashamed of myself,

and you're the only person,

the only person that can help,

when you're there they go away,

when you speak they hide,

my urges, my anger subsides

when you are near me, my dear,

I'm afraid of what I am,

I'm afraid I might someday

end up hurting you,

I can't stand that thought,

I need you to help me,

I'm not strong enough myself,

help me to fight my urges,

help me to be a better man,

save me from my nature,

help me, my love, save me.