|Journal of an Unstable Insomniac
Author: Derrick Bartane PM
Not originally intended to be humorous. Just a couple journal entries of ordinary days in my life. Complete.Rated: Fiction K+ - English - Chapters: 3 - Words: 2,404 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 3 - Follows: 2 - Updated: 10-13-09 - Published: 01-29-07 - Status: Complete - id: 2312336
|A+ A- Full 3/4 1/2 Expand Tighten|
Journal Entry #3
I wake up. I don't know where I am. I don't know who I am.
I reach over to where my daily planner is resting on my bedside table, prodding him a few times in the ribs to wake him up. After a brief lecture he promises to stop sneaking into my room while I'm asleep and scurries down the fire escape. I should really start locking my window.
Night appears to have fallen outside. I watch until the ambulance comes to take her to the hospital.
Day arrives moments later, clearly upset about having to pull a double shift. I wave hello and ask if dusk will be filling in for night temporarily. Day snarls some response about dusk being on vacation in Aruba for two weeks for its honeymoon. I nod, hiding my disappointment as not receiving a wedding invitation.
I pour myself a cup of extra decaf coffee and open the front door of my apartment. My paper is gone. I knew this day would come.
I take the stairs down and walk out the front door of my building. Thousands of papers are everywhere, openly frolicking in the street. I let them have their fun, it's nice to see some happy news for a change.
I check my watch. It says it's five o'clock next Tuesday, I'm late for my appointment. I head down the street, pausing for a minute at the corner to avoid crossing over into the Paleolithic era. These detours are getting ridiculous, it shouldn't take quantum construction workers this long to fix a simple time-space continuum.
A man on the next corner is shouting at me as I stroll up to him. He says that the end of the world is near. I tell him not to worry since the world had ended last week and it was very unlikely that it was going to end twice unless those construction workers made some serious progress.
The man looks at me strangely and pulls out a business card of a nearby psychiatrist and gives it to me after saying that I need it more than he does. I thank him and slip it into a protective sleeve along with the rest of my collection. It's getting quite extensive now; I even managed to get my hands on a Freud card from back when he was a rookie. But I digress.
I continued my walk and arrived at my dentist's office a few minutes or days later. I asked the receptionist if the dentist was ready to see me yet. After checking in her appointment book, the receptionist told me that my appointment wasn't until next month. I told her not to worry, I could wait.
While I was waiting I overheard the receptionist make a phone call to the police about a man who was loitering in her office. I went up to her and kindly explained that she was mistaking the coat rack near the door for a man and there was really no need to call the police as it was just here to do its job.
She glanced at me and walked quickly to the back room, locking the door behind her. Probably wanted to double check the employment papers.
I struck up a conversation with the coat rack who had begun sweating profusely. Apparently his green card had expired and he was worried about being deported.
I told him not to worry, it was much cheaper for the government to just recycle him into sawdust than deport him. The door opens and in storm the boys in blue, followed closely by the boys in red and then the boys in white.
Shortly after that the police arrive and say I am under arrest. I mention that before they arrest me they should probably do something about all these unsupervised boys running around, but they ignore me.
They quickly escort me out and put me in the back of a squad car, not even letting me say hello to a slightly bruised night who appears to be back on the job.
I lean against the seat, trying to find a comfortable position with my hands cuffed behind me.
I don't know where I am. I don't know who I am.