My Very Own Pit

2/22/07

My hands are cut from picking up the pieces

Sliced and bleeding, shards protruding

I’m sick to death of destruction

Of the shattering of my heart on the floor

Trying to glue the endless shrapnel

Back into something that beats and feels

But fear is the enemy now

A silent stalker in the shadows

Playing on my many insecurities.

Sometimes it’s so easy to forget how to laugh

I’m numb inside and I feel like cracking

A pistol grip cold in my hand and loaded

Singing myself into dreamless sleep

That lasts only a few blissful hours

I need to climb up out of this pit

The only rope I have is tied in a noose

Hanging from a rafter high above

Offering two separate ways out

Do I climb or swing?

One choice with two endings

So simple it seems at the crossroads

Overcome a fear of heights to regain

A memory of what life is like

Beyond the depths of inner despair

Blisters on my palms are bleeding

Struggling to pull myself up from darkness

Determined I am here, finally

I want to see the sun again.