Give me toxins.

Give me beautiful colors and fluorescent lights,

never let me sleep.

Give me coffee.

I want caffeine, I want a thousand watts beneath my

skin

charging, charged, charnel house of screaming emptiness and

anti-depressants please

burning grey matter.

Give me Prozac.

I want to feel nothing.

Nothing except energy, so much

useless

energy

in my blood in my tongue in the

EYES

that flick me back and forth,

bloodshot movie screens shouting

“I don’t believe I don’t believe”

and none of it is happening.

Look It up

it i-t: life

It all stopped when they punched me in and said

“Drink this, it will keep you awake”

and

“Take these, they will make you happy”

happy, happy, happy little drones.