sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

and wonder how it got

away.

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

until my lips are dry and cracked

and my lungs rattle like

a disease.

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

till the blood cools

and dries into cakey brown rivers

and outlines the veins

on my hand.

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

till the tears that i hid in the crease of a smile

come loose like a summer storm

and blot out dark inkstains

from long winter nights.

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

till i have the courage

to wink back at the stars

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

and wish i was more than

a word may suggest

and wonder if life isn't more

than i know, and ponder the spaces

that fill and include us, and lose

to myself in a battle of wits, and question

my answers and hope i'll have time and

the wisdom and eloquence needed for silence;

sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

and search for the melodies lost in my head,

then sometimes i sit

and catch my breath

and listening realize

i know them by heart