i’m standing here staring up at the sky

should be taking in it’s beauty

but i’m not

instead i’m here because i’m angry

“why God? how could you do this to me?”

i scream at the bright blue skies

tears begin to pour

hot saltiness on my face

and i can’t help it

this isn’t fair

God took it one step too far

i can accept one death or maybe even two

but to allow 6 of them to come at once

“what the hell were You thinking?”

i scream into the open skies

“what kind of God would allow this?”

i drop to my knees, shaking

“what kind of God tests a person like this?”

my friends were all so young

one a soldier fighting a war no one believes in

one a promising young college student

one a troubled young man

one a beloved neighbor

one a childhood friend

and to let them all die within weeks

it’s just not fair

how could this all happen at once?

and as i lay crying in the field

my only answer is silence

He makes no move to answer me

i can’t put faith in a God that would do this

some would say it’s His plan,

but what kind of plan is this?

this world is unfair

this God is unfair

why won’t He answer me?

i want to die too

but to go to a heaven with a silent God?

i couldn’t do it

i can’t take the silence any longer

i must live a life on my own

for i can’t have faith

not in a God who takes without answers

pushing a person to their breaking point

then pushing just a little farther

it’s not fair!