Today I love you.

Tomorrow I’ll hate you.

No matter what emotion I exhibit for you,

Nothing is returned.

I pointedly avoid you.

You don’t even notice.

I go out of my way to compliment you.

You thank me and I once again cease to exist.

What do I have to do

To gain any sort of lingering attention from you?

Show up naked? Die? Fawn over you constantly?

It’s not worth it.

Every weekend I build a tower of hope

Only to watch it crash to the ground

And yet I rebuild it

Week after week.

Even as I write this I know these words are useless.

You’ll never see this.

You’ll never care.

I’ll burn myself out over you.

I refuse to die so young.

I don’t care if you’re all I want.

I’ll move on.

I’ll find someone, anyone.

Anyone who looks outside themselves.

Anyone who says, “I missed you.”

Anyone who is anyone.

Anyone but you.

I can’t take this.

It’s like I pour myself into thin air.

I give too much of myself

That I can’t take back.

I feel like imitating Ophelia.

I should cast myself down from a cliff

To the murky waters below,

Where I may sink and be free.

And now I leave my affections for you behind

To experience a different kind of misery.

One where I am loved and adored

By someone I keep wishing was you.