Yeah Whatever

We were best friends (though no one knew). Neighbors; Hanging together after school (that is, when you weren’t with your “friends”). I knew you better than you knew yourself. I knew you weren’t happy (even though you tried to trick yourself into thinking that you were), I knew you actually liked math and didn’t like your little sister. I knew you preferred to be home alone reading or watching TV than pretending to be a social butterfly.

You sit all alone with your color TV

Your hair starts to glisten

In spite of the fleas

I didn’t know why we weren’t friends in school. Or maybe did but didn’t want to acknowledge it: ”Pretty Miss Perfect” best friends with that emo/punk/freak-boy? Yeah, I do know, but you know what they say: ignorance is bliss.

We don't have to stay friends

Let's pretend to be enemies

You were jealous like a lover, when I made a new friend. Cried for days, saying I didn’t like you anymore, and that he had replaced you. It began with the Marvel Comic Convention. You bailed; he said he’d go. We had fun but you were pissed so two days later you told him I was gay. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

And you're paranoid

As you look me up and down

And I'm soaked in gasoline

Mud and ice cream

I forgave you for that, like when burned my drawings of you, or when got plastered on my birthday and had to pick you up. I forgave you like I will forgive you for all the shit you’ll pull, day in and day out.

Yeah, whatever makes you happy

Yeah, whatever makes it beautiful

Yeah, whatever leaves you satisfied

You know you can find comfort in me, when your latest just cheated on you with your “best friend”, or when there’s a rumor going around that you were seen at the park with, of all people, dare I say it, me. (Our friendship takes such a toll on your popularity). I'm the one who’s shoulder you drown in a cascade of tears when your boyfriend can't call ‘cause he’s screwing Samantha.

You sit by the phone

With your tongue hanging out

You cradle the flies in the back of your mouth

Do you know how I feel when you tell me about your latest escapade with Shitface, how jealous I am of him? Not because he’s a star quarterback, but because he has you. Or are you too wrapped up in your own selfish, self-absorbed little world to notice?

You must be aware what you're

Doing to me

I want to just leave you, desert you, and let you know what it feels like to be treated like an old favorite toy: abandoned for the new and shiny, then retrieved to be showered with a sprinkle of affection, to be dropped again with the advent of latest gaudy plaything. But I can't leave you. Who will piece you back together? Not your “friends”. The most you’ll get out of them are whispers in the bathroom about how old what’s-her-name hasn’t left her house in two days and how that tattooed freak who used to stalk her doesn’t even talk her any more.

Yeah, whatever makes you happy

Yeah, whatever leaves you insecure

Yeah, seems to break you down

Who knows, maybe I will leave. This social leper has big dreams too. And if I'm lucky, absence will make your heart grow fonder.

'Cuz I'm out of time

But I'm feeling fine