There wasn’t much positive response for the last chapter…. But still I’ll write some more, maybe to see if anyone new will pick up the story. Though keep in mind, the continuance of this story depends on your reviews (I’m in dire need to know if I’m going in the right direction and whatnot).

In a way I’ve screwed up my tenses, having written the prologue in present and the first chapter in the past, when the prologue actually came before the beach scene did. Still, I’m sure you’ll be able to figure it out. Sorry about that.

But a Rose
Zakuyoe

2: Apologies rise with the morning sun

It was equally as dark by the time I arrived at my own house. From the outside it was pitch black, with absolutely no lights illuminating even the garden gnomes that scattered our front lawn; but then, that had always been the case, as my mother always wanted to leave the impression that no one was home.

I slit the key into its proper whole and swung open the door, being greeted by the usual darkness that surrounded the foyer. Again, that had been due to my mother, but it was also quite likely that no one really was home….

I took off my shoes at the door and made my way up the stairs. I had lived in this house long enough now to be able to navigate it in the dark, blindfolded; by now I was quite used to climbing and descending gloomy stairs without a problem.

Indeed, there really was a light in my mother’s room, which meant that at least she was home. “I’m home,” I called out to the hallway, letting her know of my presence before walking to my own room.

Before I could grasp the handle of my door, however, she exited her room and called out my name. “Did you have fun at the beach today?”

“’course,” I replied, removing my eyes of the door to face my mother. “When do we not?”

“Well, you never know,” she said, turning back to her own room. “And Todd, could you buy some breakfast tomorrow? I gotta go to work early tomorrow and I don’t want Noah to go hungry.”

“Sure,” I replied, waving to her before entering my room. Noah, of course, had been my younger brother of about three years, who admittedly was a lot more involved at his school than I was in mine. Not that I cared really, but I suppose he did have more time to spare—as he couldn’t yet drive I was frequently left with all the chores of the house.

Upon the walls of my room was everything. From Green Day, Alkaline Trio, and Queen, to religious posters, ads in local newspapers, and photos everyone’s given to me, there was barely a blank spot on that wall. In a way it was much better than the bland, white walls that everything covered, but it still gave reason for my mother to yell at me for something.

Naturally, the first I managed to do had been to collapse on my bed. I felt tired; but somehow my body wasn’t agreeing with my mind. My limbs were ready to fall off, yet my mind felt like thinking heavily over certain things—probably until it finally decided to be tired, too.

I didn’t want to think about Brandon or Claire, nor of the latter’s offer to lend an ear, nor even the former’s absolutely clueless demeanor. I wanted to sleep. I wanted tomorrow to come.

In the end I got neither. Tomorrow wouldn’t come for at least another three hours, and I most definitely did not catch any sleep. I suppose ultimately something cursed me, the way I happened to fall on my bed, the way my head landed and how I ended up facing the window….

The window, and then the rose. And then Brandon.

In the end I only arrived at the one thing I wanted to avoid—thinking of Brandon, and potentially Claire. But I couldn’t help it, and it wasn’t long before I found myself plagued by that perfect smile of his.

I closed my eyes, but I still saw it. I still saw that smile, his sparkling eyes, the way his hair spread itself neatly atop his forehead, how his Pac-Sun t-shirt nicely fit his physique, how his arm snaked behind his back…

…holding that flower.

The rose. That day, hours after the two had left, I remained deep in thought behind that bush. I felt many emotions that day, and I couldn’t sort any of them apart. But if there had been anything to alleviate my feelings it had been the rosebush next to me.

It would always remind me of Brandon. And so, I had taken one to keep.

It sat on my windowsill now, the same window I was currently looking at. Looking at that flower would only remind me all the more, but I couldn’t keep myself from staring at it. I had been the one to place it there; maybe I really did want to remain in the past when he was still single.

“I… I like you….” I muttered to the empty air.

I fell asleep before I could cry over my hope-deprived proclamation.

The minute I woke up I knew I had done something wrong.

The rose upon the windowsill cast a shadow upon my bed, but for the most part the sun’s warm, welcoming rays bead down upon the scattered sheets. My radio somewhere in the distanced was on, playing some rock radio station while at the same time telling me I’ve long slept past my alarm. And still, if by now I still hadn’t realized I had overslept, the poor boy sitting at my feet probably would’ve told me something.

“I’m hungry.”

And immediately I sprang out of bed, pulling the first thing I see over my head and up to my waist. A hastily placed belt and I was good to go, but it had taken another five minutes to locate my wallet and my keys. Somehow that night I had slept without putting the keys back on the key rack and consequently had them lost somewhere near my bed.

Noah was wearing a very amused expression by the time I finally gathered everything I meant to bring along, and leading him with a hand on one shoulder I took him out to my car. A decent car admittedly, but not one I really preferred to have.

“McDonalds?” he pleaded, putting his hands together and giving me that puppy-eye stare. Granted, he had entered the double digits more than a year ago, yet….

“Sure.” The particular ride was silent but for the most part due to his looking out the window. The trees in the area tended to vary greatly; perhaps you would see a large row of palm trees, but later on you’d still see the typical oak trees that hibernated in the winter time.

McDonalds was only ten minutes from our place, yet the drive still felt like such a long time. Frequently I’d see people there, people I knew from school or from other such places, and many times I wished I hadn’t seen them. I wasn’t the most social of people….

We arrived within time, and as I took the keys out of the car Noah happily jumped outside. As we made our way through the doors he was already beginning to list off to me his orders and what he wanted, but half the time I hadn’t really paid attention. My eyes were peeled on a more worthy distraction at the moment.

When he caught my gaze staring at him, I had finally decided to look the other way and tune in once more to my brother’s requests.

“Sausage biscuit?” was the first thing that came out of my mind.

“No!” Noah insisted, crossing his arms. “I’m too old for that, dumb butt! I want chicken nuggets!”

“It’s breakfast menu, Noah.”

“It was breakfast menu!” corrected my brother. “If you had woken up earlier it would’ve been.”

“Okay, okay. Go find yourself a seat while I order, then.” With a very tight embrace of gratitude he left my position in the life, probably headed to the condiments area to equip himself with paper napkins.

Somewhere behind me I knew that same person was probably still staring at me. Alan Johnson had been his name, but that was a name I hoped not to hear as often as I could. He really hadn’t been bad in any way, only… he was the most flamboyant homosexual in the school, and he had large tendencies of hitting on me.

Whether or not he knew I was homosexual was one thing… whether I actually minded him doing it was another. So thus, I just avoided him altogether.

“May I take your order?” the woman at the counter asked, smiling at me the way all the employees were trained in doing.

“I’ll have a medium number eight, with Sprite,” I reply almost monotonously. “And could I have a combo of chicken nuggets, too?”

“How many?” and now I think about it there were probably different sizes of that, too….

“Whatever’s smallest, then.” She flashed me another mechanical smile within seconds, and within minutes I had received my order. Now, just to worry about eating and leaving as quickly as possible….

I gaped at what I saw: Alan sitting with my brother at the table. And the smile upon Alan’s face had been too suggestive for his own good.

“It’s Todd!” he exclaimed the second he saw me, jumping up from his seat and giving me a mighty squeeze. “How are ya, man? How’s break goin for ya?” Admitted Alan wasn’t at all that bad looking; he was hardly developed, still resembling much of a kid, yet there was something about him that would attract many girls. Personally I thought he was decently looking too, but Brandon….

“I’m… fine,” I manage to sputter as he let go of me; “I’ve been at the beach a whole lot.”

“Oh, the beach!” I managed to glance quickly over at my brother as Alan gave me a sharp poke to the stomach with a single finger; Noah made a small gagging motion, placing a choking pair of hands at his neck, and as Alan stops his pokes I tried my best not to laugh. “You got a great tan, then! Can’t wait to see it!”

Not that he ever will, but….

“I need to eat break—lunch with my brother,” I decided to tell him at long last. “I’ll see you at school, maybe.”

“Yep. Bye, Todd!” and he gave me on last wink and wave before fleeting back to the seat I had originally seen him at. I tried to ignore the awkward stares given at me. Or rather him, but as he left they found it much easier to glare at me instead.

“He… scares me,” my brother finally muttered after at least five minutes of eating.

At that moment I couldn’t agree with him more.

The minute we entered our street on our return home I noticed a familiar car parked in front of our house.

“Brandon’s here!” Noah exclaimed, taking off his seatbelt though we hadn’t stopped yet. My brother was quite ecstatic every time Brandon visited our house, much as I always was on the inside, and he’d do his best to claim ever second of my friend’s visit.

Though as for why he was here…. I shut off the car as I stepped outside the car, watching my little brother run into the house. Seeing the car alone, however, was enough reason to make me question; it wasn’t often that his mother would let him drive the family car, which was why I constantly carpooled him to the beach.

Much not to my surprise, I found Brandon within the deathly embrace of my happy brother. “Brandon!”

“Hey… Noah….” He patted the boy on the back several times before gazing upward in my direction. “Todd, could I talk to you for a sec?”

He flashed me a smile after his request. That smile. How then could I say no? “Sure. Noah, let him go.” A reluctant Noah did exactly as I had asked him to, and as he trotted away somewhere to his room I looked back at Brandon. “What’s up, dude?”

“I wanted to apologize,” he said rather quickly, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

“Oh?”

“Yeah…. You know, for accusing you of doing stuff with my girlfriend after you dropped me off last night.” With his girlfriend…. I cringed slightly at the hearing of it, quickly recomposing myself as I shook it off. With his girlfriend… the position I only hoped to be in, though not so much the girl part of it.

“You never said anything like that last night,” I said, recalling the events of the night before. As far as my memory told me, I didn’t ever remember him accusing me of anything.

“I kinda meant to,” he said with a sigh, scratching the top of his head. “I gave you really weird looks and stuff, and—”

“I get it,” I replied. “I suppose… I forgive you?”

“Thanks,” he said. “And I’m awfully sorry for even thinking you’d ever do something like that. I mean I’ve known you for a long time, dude…. You’d never do anything like that.”

“Hey, hey!” I said with a laugh, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, Brandon. Besides, I think you’re giving me credit where none is due.”

“Credit where none is due?” he repeated, and I could only chuckle in embarrassment. “Who the hell says stuff like that anymore?”

“Apparently, me,” I snapped. Eventually, though, the laughter died into the awkward silences of the kitchen, all until the last echoes reverberated in the rooms further off.

“Todd…. Your hand…?” And yet again I found myself chuckling nervously, backing away as I turned away from the perfect smile he was giving me. Now I was just hoping I wouldn’t turn beet red from this… though, I was quite sure I had already failed in that aspect. “Hey Todd, I’m gonna go pick up Claire to go to the beach. You… you wanna come along?”

I found myself frowning quite unpleasantly. “Can’t,” I replied, sulking. “I’ve got to keep an eye out for Noah.”

“Leave him at Claire’s,” Brandon replied. “He can stay with Cole and the rest of Claire’s family.” He smirked at my hesitation. “You know you wanna go to the beach….”

All it took was one smile; after that I had no other choice. “Fine.”

Then, to Noah, “Get ready, Noah, we’re leaving!” Peering from the corner of the wall a not-so-ecstatic Noah groaned, trudging away to change into more suitable attire.

“Todd?” Brandon asked suddenly, breaking the silence that had developed between us while waiting for my brother. “Hey, if… say if you did like Claire and stuff…. You’d tell me about it, right?”

“Of course,” I replied solemnly, turning away. “’course I would, dude.”

As his best friend, I would be sure to tell him if it were Claire I liked.

Yet, also as his best friend, I would be sure to not tell him if it were him I liked.