A half-eaten donut: pineapple filling.

“Hello, me.” I say to myself.

“Hi.” Was my reply.

“I’m hungry.” I honestly say.

“How about a donut then?” I say as I eat the donut (half-eaten; pineapple filling.)

“Still hungry.” I say.

“Fuck you.”

:break the rules! Spooooooooooooooooooooon!!...!!:

:just t0o tell you, the regular rules of writing do not apply. History may also be altered:

:maybe you’d see Godzilla attacking penguins in Antarctica:

:so keep quiet and read: resistance is futile:

When I was a kid I was fascinated by dinasours. I mean, dinosaurs, but even if I liked them I wouldn’t even think one second to stick my head up inside their ass to see the mechanics that’s going on. Magic was the same way; I love the pretty colors, but having an accident like losing my manly potency because of a botched spell is a negative for me.

Thinking about it now... it doesn’t make sense since I am one—magic practitioner (freelance), that is.

Abra Cadabra! I’m a mage, starving since my college drop-out days. Half-eaten donuts in a bad day, and running around in the streets doing anything for work any other day. I know magic, but so do several fortune-tellers, street magicians, and funny old men who own dancing monkeys. Thankfully, I survive with certain talents…

One- I can survive a whole day with only a stale potato to eat.

Two- I know how to dance.

Three- I work any job I can possibly do for cheap.

Four- I can count past three… and beyond.

And I know how to stick my business to where it won’t, or don’t belong. Like magic, maybe not like a dinosaur’s butthole, I was born to be an investigator. Hell, I can do things with my magic, like, break the fourth wall thing.

Hell, I’d tell you stuff about you! Let’s see, just one…

Right now, if you can read this, you probably know how to read English. Probably.

:me watching amateur wrestling is like looking at something which resembles the kamasutra:

“Well,” I say to the monitor as I type, “that went well.”

“This is just an intro by the way, I’m too sleepy to write an entire skit.” I add

“See you next week with the first story of Teatime of the Gods…”

“Super Sentai Five!... backstage access.”