Chapter 3

Andy grabbed Laura's hand and stood up, staring at the huge ladder towering above them. It was well into the third wheel of the van by now, and there was a whole street of cars outside. They had to act quickly.

He ran out towards the road, in the midst of other screaming students frantically trying to push their way to the front of the bundle. For a moment Andy's hand lost Laura's, and in a blind panic he swept around until he found it again. It was a lot sweatier and clammier than he remembered, but he had no time to look back and check if she was OK. They finally managed to push their way through the rabble and by the road. Cars had stopped so the drivers could stare at the ladder in wonder. Were they so stupid? Andy thought. Here was a giant ladder picking up a lorry to pluck off its wheels one by one, and here they were sitting in cars with four wheels to watch it beat up other four-wheeled vehicles!

"Laura," he called behind him, "We need to warn these - "

"Dude," replied Laura in a suprisingly low voice and letting go of his hand, "Are you insane?" Andy turned to stare at her in shock, only to find himself not looking at Laura but the disgusted face of Geoffrey. He coughed and discreetly rubbed his hands on his trousers.

"Sorry. I thought you were Laura."

"Why? Do I really look like her? Man, I thought I was pretty, but - " but Andy had already disappeared. He decided that there was no time to search for Laura, he would just have to warn the cars themselves. Besides, he'd always dreamed of being a hero. Even if he was only fighting ladders.

He ran up to the first car and tapped frantically on the window. There was a man and his girlfriend inside, staring in awe at the face which had just blocked their view of the ladder.

"Oh my gosh, it's so ugly..." whispered the girl in terror, but then the man realised it was only a school kid and winded down the window.

"Is there a problem, sonny?" He drawled, looking genuinely surprised. Andy wondered how much crazier this day could get.

"Are you crazy?" he yelled. It was not the right idea. The girlfriend shrieked in terror and ran screaming from the car, waving her arms above her head. "There's a giant ladder eating cars, and you're sat here in your car eating popcorn watching it?" But the man was now angry at Andy for scaring off his girlfriend, so he wound up the window again and yelled,

"I don't have any popcorn, you idiot! You're the one who's going crazy!" But Andy didn't hear him because the window was up.

As he ran to the next car, Andy thought it had been a good idea to scare off the girl because now she wasn't in any more danger from the giant ladder. But his thoughts were shattered when the next car wound its window down and he saw the girl sitting in the passenger seat of that car.

"Aargh!" She yelled and dashed out of the car, but this time she disappearede into the woods. He turned back to the driver, who was also staring at him.

"Oh, it's you." She sighed, got out of the car and followed the other girl into the woods. What the - ? thought Andy. Do I know her? He shrugged and walked on to the next car, turning around for a moment to see that the ladder had moved on to decapitating a school minibus, about 50 metres away from the road. Were these people so stupid?

The car in front was empty. Probably because they'd seen all the people who were running from Andy and decided it would be best to run from him too. Well, at least that would solve some of the problem.

"Andy!" he heard a voice yell, and he turned thankfully to see Laura running to him, with a hand at her side and gasping for air. "Andy, you left without me! I could have been killed!"

"I'm sorry," Andy apologised sincerely, "I thought I had you, but you turned out to be Geoffrey."

"Oh."

"Yeah." Andy shifted uncomfortably, watching Laura's face. It was going through a peculiar mix of expressions. First she frowned, then her eyebrows raised and she looked surprised, then her mouth went down so she was making one of those 'Oh, really?" looks that Andy knew so well, and then the eyebrows resumed their original position and she looked incredibly sad.

"Do I really look like Geoffrey?" she said.

"Er... no, but his was the first hand I grabbed." Laura's facial expressions were going at such a rate now that Andy decided maybe it was time he stopped. "Er... let's get going." he muttered, and banged on the window of the next occupied car.

The window was wound down by an old man in his late hundred-and-twenties.

"Can I help, Maria?" he whispered.

"Er... I'm not Maria. But you need to get away. There's a giant ladder about to eat your car."

The old man shook his head. "I always knew you had a wild imagination, Gwen. But adders don't eat cars."

"I know adders don't eat cars. But ladders do. And I'm not Gwen, either." Andy added, as an after-thought.

"Oh."

"I'm afraid so. You need to move. Can you run?"

"Of course I can run, Karen. How old do you think I am?" Andy chose not to answer that question. He opened the door, and waited for the old man to get out. He then pointed in the direction of the woods, and watched as the man sprinted across the road and disappeared out of sight. Wonders will never cease, he thought.

He turned to warn the next car, but was faced with a white pole about the width of a football. After a couple seconds, he realised it was one of the ladder's legs, and the car in front was gone. He slowly looked up to see the ladder holding the car, plucking off the front right wheel. He could hear faint screaming coming from inside.

"Hey!" Laura yelled, and ran over to try and distract the ladder. Andy knew that there was a boy in the car on his own, as he'd caught a glimpse of him just as he was about to warn him about the ladder. He ran up to Laura and was suddenly hit with a brainwave... ladders were made for climbing!

He inspected the ladder closely. Each rung was about a metre apart, and he guessed that with his expertise 'martial arts' training, he could probably climb up. Worth a try, he thought.

So, ignoring Laura's screaming lecture about how dangerous ladders could be, he started to make his way up to the gaping hole of the ladder's mouth.