Because of you

I can't leave the past in the past

I forgot how to forget

I wake up wishing I was dead

I forgot how to want to live

I love the cuts and scars on my arms

I forgot to try to stop myself

I feel dead

I forgot how to feel anything else

I don't know who I am

I forgot who I was going to become

I am paranoid

I forgot how to trust

I frown all the time

I forgot how to smile

My life has been a living hell

I forgot what life was supposed to be like.

And I blame you for all of this and more

You're in me and you won't go away

I just want to be alone in my mind

And be rid of me.

---

10/18/05