I am not mad.

Sometimes I think I am,

But I’m not.

I sometimes think

That if I were mad,

Things would be easier.

(People watch me.)

If I were mad,

I wouldn’t be able

To control my actions,

My thoughts,

My words,

Or even myself.

(I can’t see them, but they watch me.)

I just want to be left alone

And avoid the prods

And pokes

From the people

Wearing masks

Carved with smiles.

(If I needed money, would you lend me it?)

Those masks are terrifying.

They make people seem

Different from me

Though I know

We’re all the same

Underneath.

(I never asked you for money.)

At least my mask

Is a true representation of the way I feel

Instead of a forced smile,

Sparkly eyes,

Fake laughter,

And a kind word.

(I only asked you for love.)

I want to escape

Though I know

Of only one way

Which is frowned upon

By others.

It is my only choice.

(Was that too much for you to give?)

I wish I could paint the sky

So the sun would never again shine

Through my window

Onto my skin

Burning a new day of life

Into me.

(I never wanted this anyway.)