When I was really little

A bad man hit me

And touched me in ways

I didn’t know how to tell weren’t okay

As I got older I realized it was wrong

But I didn’t have a way

To set myself free

From the hell in which I was enslaved

But I squeezed my fists tight

To summon all my strength

And bit the insides of my cheeks until they bled

But I would not be defeated

Because I am a survivor

I heard whispers and talking

And screaming

And I could tell no one else heard it

But I was too scared to mention it

I cried a lot and through huge fits

But I held my ground

And distracted myself with made up stories

And games I played inside my head

I would not be defeated

Because I am a survivor

As I got older

The abuse worsened

I began to hate myself and feel uncomfortable

In my own body

I stopped eating to make myself sick

And got myself into a hospital

To get away from a life filled with terror

Because I would not be defeated

I am a survivor

I endured tubes being shoved up my nose

And being strapped down to a bed

And was told I was lying

When I knew my words were truth

I felt the feelings

Of total powerlessness

And knew that’s not the way

I wanted my life to be

So I promised myself

That it won’t always be this way

That somehow,

Some way

I will make things change

Now it’s twelve hospitalizations later

I’m stuck on a locked unit again

I’ve felt out of control

Humiliation, defeat, sadness, hopelessness

I’ve want to just retreat into myself

And never come out

Some people might just give up

Figure they’re fighting a losing battle

Get sick of all the messes and troubles and drama

But where there’s life there’s hope

And I am not a quitter

I’ll just keep on trying

Because I am strong

I’ve come this far

I will not be defeated

I am a survivor