First of all, let me say thanks to those who reviewed- Psychogizmo, Reading W Wench, and lostx! Thank you for the kind reviews and glad you were amused!

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Chapter Two

Lysol, Marriage, and Metros

In seventh grade, on rainy days and days when it was really too cold to go outside, we had recess in the classrooms. We tended to do the same things as we did outside, or we just hung around and talked.

Tyler never talked. He could, but he didn't. Also, he was one of the smartest people in school, tied only with Georgie. And one day, at recess in Ms. H's room, something miraculous happened.

Me, Kelly, Rachel, Marie, and Georgie were talking and pretty much everybody was in there and there was lots of noise, as usual, and then Brad stood up on a table, holding his hands up and saying, "Everybody, could I get your attention!"

The room fell to a hush. You could probably hear a pin drop if it wasn't carpeted.

Brad took a dramatic pause. "Tyler just spoke."

Everybody laughed and broke out in applause. It was a proud, proud day for Paramount.

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We had two Davids. There was David Davis and David Delgado. I'd always considered David Davis the more agreeable of the two Davids, but that was just because David Delgado was always causing trouble of some kind.

I sat behind David Delgado in 8th grade Algebra. Kelly noted that the ironic part was that in Spanish, "delgado" means "thin". Take this as you want.

One day while in math class, we were in the middle of Chapter 3, Lesson 4 (most likely, as we studied that lesson for three months, no joke), when suddenly, something foul let adrift in the air.

It was coming from... who else?

Within a few moments, Ms. Sharpe (the math teacher), was marching around the room with a air freshener like she was no longer Ms. Sharpe the math teacher, but Lietenant Lysol, sworn protector of clean air!

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Miss Draper got engaged between the summer of 7th and 8th grade. We were, more or less, shocked, especially when she canceled the science midterm.

Keith ruined it. Instead of just accepting this as a gift from God, you know what that boy said?

"Miss Draper, you should get married more often!"

She didn't let him off that easy after the history midterm when he thought the Allies were, and I quote, "the weapons they fought with."

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We often took very impromptu field trips that had no particular educational value. One time, in seventh grade, Ms. H and Miss Draper took us down the street to the root beer stand so we could get floats. What, it was a very nice day out!

Another time, during gym, we decided it was too sunny to stay put at school, so we convinced the gym teacher to take us for a walk. We were gone for at least a half-hour.

But perhaps the best impromptu field trip of all was the time in eighth grade when they loaded us (and by us, I mean only the eighth graders) on a Metro (that's a city bus, for you who don't live here) and took us to see one of the first showings of Holes when it first came out. It was the best fun we had ever had.

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In sixth grade, we had a huge drama club. It wasn't a class, though, it was just something to do after school.

Mikey was a weird kid and a fifth grader. Bad combination. Our drama teacher told us he wanted to see a runway style walk as an opening exercise at one of the meetings.

So Mikey walked like he had a really, really bad wedgie.

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In eighth grade, we found out several of Keith's deep, dark secrets.

Secret number one: He looked up to Urkel as a fashion expert.

"Keith, why are you wearing knee-highs?"

"They're cool!"

"Oh yeah, just like Urkel."

"That's who I'm tryin' to be!"

Secret number two: He had a feminine side.

"...You what?"

"I shaved my legs."

"Um..."

"Are you trying to get in touch with your feminine side?"

Secret number three: He couldn't spell.

"Keith, you spelled 'grass' wrong."

"That's Georgie's paper."

"No it's not!"

"How did he spell 'grass' wrong?"

"It's Georgie's! Georgie did it!"

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In seventh grade, in English, we wrote a story. It was a love story with the classic "Once upon a time" beginning and "and they all lived happily ever after" end.

We loved stories.

I was making a movie called "Untitled Movie: The Movie" and Ryan thought since it was untitled, it should be called "Bolsheviks".

We argued about that one until the end of the year.

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There were cow brains sitting in the hallway for two weeks. We never touched them. Why?

Mad Cow Disease.

Yeah. I know.

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"Only one person got the question about photosynthesis wrong."

Miss Draper could be so mean.

"Keith."

"What?"

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As last chapter, all of these... I don't know what you call them... but they're all true.

Even the one about Keith spelling "grass" wrong. I was completely serious. I think he spelled it like g-r-a-s or something. I dunno, it was 4 years ago.