Thousands and thousand of things I have yet to say

get caught in my throat,

and I get lost in the void that they leave.

Knowing the truth before it was spoken,

knowing the results before the actions were made.

Is this a gift?

cause it feels like a curse,

when at every turn my mistakes surface again.

If only I had the strength to say what it is that needs to be heard.

Is this truly my path?

to be trapped by my past.

Despite the burning tears I have yet to cry,

my hindsight is still unblemished,

sweeping any small ammount of courage I'd built

from under my feet leaving me with nowhere to stand.

there is little time before it happens again

so this is what I haven't said

I have yet to let go

It is impossible to hide from myself

every distraction I find

only reminds me of my loss

I don't want to grow cold

not after I finally learned how to feel

I stand by word

I'll wait forever

you knew that I was lying

but you didn't know

that the lies were aimed at myself.