It was that time of the month again. Time to pay the child support, and, as usual, Martin Pershing was having a hard time finding the money to pay for it. Of course, he would have to resort to his last resort once again.

It was years since Martin Pershing had divorced his wife, but not soon enough to avoid having a child. The divorce was made for one of the strangest of reasons, though it made perfect sense. After all, Martin Pershing and his wife were absolutely compatible in every way imaginable. They loved the same movies, the same food... they always did nice things for each other, held doors open, pulled out chairs, had a little fun... Yet it was one simple reason that the wife decided to break away from Martin's wife.

Martin looked at himself in the mirror. He had hardly recognized his figure. He stared at a middle-aged man. A balding middle-aged man at that, though a stylish hat would easily cover that up. He was still in shape, and was grateful for his health, though. He still had all his teeth, and they were as pearly as ever. If he were ten or twenty years younger, he wouldn't be able to walk out in public without girls from all directions mauling him.

But perhaps his most mysterious feature was his grey eyes. No one had eyes quite like them. The eyes caught everything, but were very secretive about it. They were quite mysterious in that they told nothing about the man to those who knew nothing about him, yet everything about the man who truly knew him. Martin placed some eye contacts in and blinked furiously until the contacts found their place in his eyes, darkening the grey and producing a natural brown.

Martin knew he could get his money soon, and therefore he was not distressed at all in attending a friend's party. After checking to see if he looked his finest in his dark suit, Martin left his apartment.

---

It was a gaudy mansion of three stories, and it almost hurt one's eyes as they strained to see the entire mass of the building at once. It was a typical dream mansion with windows staring outside every room and light emitting from all rooms as well. If the outside was gaudy, however, the inside was just disgusting. Chandeliers hung from every ceiling and lit up the room as if the sun never went down. It was all so beautiful with the perfectly polished wooden doors and the rugs from all over the world spread on top of the perfectly polished wooden floor. There was not a speck of dust out of place, and Martin noted all of this as he took his first few steps into the abode of Sir Arthur Jeiger Candide Frankstein Chester III, esq., or Arthur as he demanded everyone call him, except his various housemaids and servants who had to refer to him by Mr. Chester.

"Gaudy," Martin muttered under his breath.

"You like it?" Arthur asked, as he walked into the foyer and approached the front door. "The foyer," thought Martin to himself, "must be the most useless room mankind has created."

"It's..." Martin was apparently at a loss for words.

"It's marvellous, isn't it?" asked Arthur in a borderline feminine voice. He looked borderline feminine himself, with his over-polished shoes, lint-free coat, and glossily moussed brown hair. Martin almost winced looking at the shiny, almost fake figure standing in front of him. He smiled and outstretched his hand.

"Come, come, the guests are waiting," said Arthur as he shoved Martin in front of him.

There were guests all right. Martin hadn't really noticed who any of them were except Arthur's wife, Louisa Chester; and a detective, Dr. Hadean. Arthur's wife was almost as gaudily dressed as the house. A glittering dress of jewels draped her body and reflected every light that shone upon them. Louisa was probably twenty, and was obviously far too young for Arthur. Her dark brown hair flowed down her Russian body. Diamond necklaces lined her neck and golden bracelets covered her arms so the perfect skin underneath might be preserved. She was almost fake, thought Martin to himself.

Dr. Hadean, on the other hand, was dressed in a dirty suit and wore a ruffled moustache. His hair was hastily brushed for the occasion, and it showed. Dr. Hadean's eyes darted left and right quickly to evidently collect suspicious activity, though Martin saw none to detect.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Arthur anounced in a projected, feminine voice. "May I present to you my friend Martin Pershing."

It was as if applause should be heard at that point. Martin felt awkward, as he didn't know whether or not to bow or walk away shamefully for a lack of applause, though evidently none was to be expected, as the others resumed their talk. Louisa approached them, and after a long and unnecessary embracement with her supposedly legally married husband, who, with no doubt, had already married many women of tewnty before and would marry many women of twenty after having finished with Louisa, shook hands with Martin.

"Pleasure," blurted out Martin.

"Oh, the pleasure's all mine," said Louisa with as much sex as she could put into her words

"Might I ask," said Martin as he turned to Arthur, "why the good Detective Hadean is here?"

"Everyone's been asking us all night," remarked Louisa. "It is rather annoying that he should get more questioning than me," she said out of jealousy.

"It's an interesting story, really," said Arthur, ignoring his wife. "I suppose you might have him come over and he should tell you himself. Oh, Dr. Hadean!"

Dr. Hadean looked up from his observations and walked over to Arthur. Dr. Hadean happened to be wearing boots to the occasion, which clunked everywhere he happened to walk.

"Dr. Hadean, I believe you should have the honors of telling Martin why you are here."

"Right," said Dr. Hadean after studying Martin carefully. Dr. Hadean led Martin into a library room that was unusually quieter than the rest of the house. Dr. Hadean closed the door and looked about the bookshelves to be sure that no one was there before he began his explanation.

"You see, actually, the Chesters have received a.. well... a message. A kind of threat..."

Dr. Hadean studied his reactions carefully, but Martin had little. Death was the first thing that crossed his mind, though the second thing was easily theft.

"It is a threat of... well, perhaps you should read it yourself."

Dr. Hadean produced an envelope from his inside sleeve and handed it to Martin. He unfolded the envelope and the message inside. The message was a letter addressed to Arthur and Louisa and read as follows:

---

Dearest Sir Arthur Jeiger Candide Frankstein Chester III, esq. and Louisa Chester:

I have come to acquire your most valued treasure, that is, that prized painting of Arsene Lupin. I shall arrive at the Thirtieth of July to retrieve it, unless you feel at liberty to deliver it to me.

Faithfully Yours,

Vincent Jefferson

---

It was the well-known thief Vincent Jefferson! Martin recalled the date as being July 30! What an excitement the party now appeared to be after the revelation of a possible thief among the party guests!

"And have you caught him yet?" Martin asked.

Dr. Hadean gave him a cold glance that told him that Vincent Jefferson was, evidently, still at large.

"That is all you need to know," said Dr. Hadean as he took the envelope and message back.

"Excuse me, sirs!" said Arthur as he came bounding into the room as if skipping through a field of flowers and daffodils. "We are about to display the fabulous painting of Arsene Lupin! Won't you join us?"

And the three left the library room to see the painting that this Vincent Jefferson proposed to steal.