Never Let Go!

I want to cry
I want to sit down and cry
And be held and told it’ll all be alright
I want to be loved and let the tears flow
I want to be happy
I want the tears to wash away the pain
So when the tears stop flowing
All the pain and troubles will be gone
I want you to tell me
It’s okay to cry
It’s okay to break down
Just as long as I’ll get back up again
And you’ll be there
You’ll help me through it all
You’ll hold my hand
And never let go again.

I want to cry
I want to break down
Just as long as you are there
To catch me before I fall
I want you to tell me
You’ll be there to mend my broken bones
When you’re to late to catch my body
But you’ll never let my heart be broken

I want you to reach out to me
And never let me down
I want to feel your love
I want you to feel mine
I want...I want...
I want so much
It’ll scare you maybe
It might put you off
But still
I want you to stay
I want to be held by you
And only you
So never let me go again
Never let me down.

I want to cry
I want you t cry along
I want to break down
I want you to be strong
I want to see your tears
And you to see mine
I want to cry and break down
Only to come out stronger again
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
So make me strong
Hold me close
Don’t let go
Never let go.

Anna heard the words flow out of her mouth as if it weren’t her own. She never showed her feelings that much but it felt good to finally let it all out. And as the river of words flowed on the tears flowed along. They kept coming and wouldn’t stop, she couldn’t make them stop. Only he could do that, she knew that now and so did he. So she kept looking at him, hoping he’d do as she hoped. Do as she wanted. She kept on looking hoping he’d step forward but as her hopes went up once he started shifting on his feet, his phone rang. His wife. Perfect timing, don’t you think. And as he spoke to the girl, her name was Carina, he turned on his heels and walked out of Anne’s life.

Mike just left. He didn’t look back, because he knew if he did he’d break down with Anna. He just hoped she would know. Even if he didn’t look back, he still cared. If he didn’t look back, he still cried. If he didn’t look back he still loved her and wanted to catch her as she fell to the floor. If only he wasn’t with Carina. If only he had chosen Anna over Carina and not the other way around back in the days. If only he had listened to his heart rather then his mind. Because Carina was his wife already, but Anna had his heart. She could not give it back. He was not about to take it back from her just like he didn’t want to give her heart back. She was his love. But Carina his wife. Anna was his life, which he could not spent.

Carina had seen it all, the love that flowed through the people before her. Anna and Mike. How it pained her to see them together but how she knew it was just right. Then as Anna poured her heart out for him to see everything it held within, Carina could not help herself. She had to get him away before he would give in. She knew he belonged with Anna but she wanted him to be with her. He would love her again one day. If only Anna was out of his life. And if he walked out now she would disappear. At least so she hoped. Yet as she saw Mike’s face as he turned his back on her, on love, doubt settled in. She had waited to long, let it go to far without interruptions. She lost him. He was hers now.
Now don’t you think Carina would give up like that. She’d go down with a fight. Mike was hers until a divorce was through. And wasn’t about to let that happen fast nor easily. Anna would have to try a little harder.

Anna fell down on her knees as her legs just gave away. Tears kept streaming like rivers down her cheeks. Before she could not stop them. Now, she no longer wanted to. If he didn’t love her then who would. Who could love with such passion. If he was gone, she’d be lost. If he really wanted out of her life, she would not have a life anymore. How did it get this far? How did she get this depressed? How did this all happen? How...just how?
“I love you” she whispered in the wind. Knowing he could not hear her. Knowing he was out of reach, back to the wife. Back to his family as he said. Breaking her heart into many little pieces, not knowing if it could ever be mend again. Taking the shreds and stomping on like it were nothing. Making it seem like it was no crime. Yet he committed so many crimes the past year.
Stealing is a crime and he stole her heart.
Breaking something that isn’t yours is crime and he broke the heart he stole from her.
It’s like a fading photograph kept in a valid safe nobody ever looks at. Probably nobody who knows where it is. Nobody knows where to look for it. Just because it’s faded.

Mike walked for a while after he hung up on Carina, he could not get the image of Anna out of his mind. How could he just walk away after she told him she needed him, she loved him. What was he supposed to do? His mind was telling him to go back to Carina, after all she was his wife for many years now but that little voice in the back of his mind also told him he would be an idiot to let Anna walk away with his heart in her grasp. He started pacing back and fort in an alley near where he left Anna, which was also near to where Carina said she’d be, wondering where he should go.

Should he walk towards Carina and stick to that what he already knows. The safe path of life.
OR should he walk back to where he left Anna, hoping she would still be there, waiting for him and hoping that they would be together forever after that. So in fact giving up all he knows and starting a new adventure. Pondering those thoughts for a while he knew he had to make a decision fast, for the women would not wait until forever. Mike just hoped someone could give him a sign, show him the right direction. Mike hoped someone would tell him what to do, but also knew that hope was in vain. What the Hell was he supposed to do?
Maybe he should just sleep on it...