Author: Satan'z Myth PM
What do you do when you are gay and in love with your sister's boyfriend? And you realize that you can't deprive your sister because, you're, as you're constantly reminded, a.. a fag? CHAPTER 4 now up !Rated: Fiction M - English - Romance/Drama - Chapters: 4 - Words: 6,670 - Reviews: 16 - Favs: 7 - Follows: 14 - Updated: 12-27-07 - Published: 05-22-07 - id: 2365127
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A/N : Finally, a new chapter - yayy! If things go well, I'll be writing more tomorrow and updating either this or CLE... you guys ARE reading "Confusion's Lasting Eye", aren't you? If not - go, read it!
Also, for those of you who won't be checking out my profile..I want to make it evident right now and here that Kellan Rhode is actually a real person whom I came across on an International trip. And, he looks just hos he is described, and ma-an was he hot... -fazes out-
by Satan'z Myth
Chapter 4 : I'll Move On..but Not Forget
"Julius, are you..alright?" my sister asked from where she stood, outside my door. She knocked again, but I did not respond. This has been the standings for the past five minutes, and I was still not convinced enough to let my sister in. She knocked again.
This time, tired, I said back, "Judy, go away.. I don't want to hear about you hot date!" I felt as bitter as I sounded.
It had been a single week since he had asked her out, and they had already been labeled "high school sweethearts". Everyone seemed to be seeing them as potential lovers – with wedding bells ringing in the background. Some times I wonder if it is going to be me who will have to be Kellan's best man…
I know these thoughts are very far-fetched, but for someone feeling as hopelessly defeated in love, it can not really be too unusual.
"Please, Julius, open the door for once… I need to talk to you," the energy in her voice seemed to fluctuate. Some times she sounded as if she would give up, next moment she was all determined.
I refused to respond.
"Look here, Julius..it has been a week and you still can't get over Kellan?" Ethan started. "We are all trying to make you smile and cheer you up, but.. are you yourself even trying? No matter what, we care a lot about you, and…you think we want to see you like this?"
I nodded, feeling slightly guilty that I had been ruining it for my friends. "Listen, guys.. Am sorry that am acting like a dweeb," I started, to which Liam and Craig nodded fervently earning a glare from Ethan. "But, this is not that easy… okay, I'll try, alright?"
They smiled, and Craig, the drama queen mock-sobbed into his silk hanky "oohh, baby..you've made momma proud…" And he piched my cheeks as if I was five.
I got even more suspicious when I enter the cafeteria to find them not there. I would have gone off to look for them, but my stomach betrayed my concern, as I sighed and proceeded to get a tray and the food that was chicken that looked DEAD (minus the fact that it was..) and a sandwich. My eyes seeked a place to sit, and finding one somewhere near the back, I started walking down the room.
All of a sudden, some one collided with me, and my tray met the floor. That certain someone with messy red hair started muttering apologies, and bent down to sit on his knees to pick up the stuff, before realizing it was no use. "It's alright.." I started, but he said, looking close to tears, "I am so sorry..I'll get you something else, please don't be mad…I..I.." He took my hand in his, "please, give me another chance…"
I was too stunned for words. "Listen, why're you doing this? I don't even know you…go ahead, do whatever, I can manage myself…"
A look of pure anguish spread on his face, and he began to walk away. But the look had had me feeling guilty. I stopped him from going, "listen, I am sorry I was rude. But, don't worry, it is alright..accidents happen. Sometimes."
He smiled at me, and before my brain registered, the crazy red-headed boy gave me a slight peck on my lips, and ran out.
I looked up from my sandwich and looked at him suspiciously. "Nope. No one in particular."
I put in a glance to see his reaction. He looked alienated.
"Okay, fine..I can't take it anymore… did Cohemore come to you?"
"Well, who?" I am confused a lot of time. Am sorry, if you don't like it. Am bad with names.
"You know, Allen Cohemore..red hair, in eighth grade. He's fawned on you and followed you around and nearly stalked you for nearly all his life!" Ethan said, in a way that made all that seem so factual and made me feel slightly stupid that I did not know.
"Oh, red hair… oh, yeah..but, wait – how do you guys know?"
The blend of guilt and naughtiness across their faces made it evident that…
"It was YOUR plan to set me up with him?" I spat out.
"Well, yeah..please don't be angry, but..we thought it would atleast stop you from thinking that Rhode's the only guy in the world!" Liam said.
I smiled. "Listen guys, thanks but..let me do this myself..please?"
"Okay, squirto !But,…" Craig hugged my back. "Know that all of us care for you…"
I said I'll try to move on. I never said that I'll stop loving him. I added to myself.
"What do you want?" I called back wearily.
"Nothing you can give me…" he winked. "Unless you can grow yourself a pair of tits and get rid of a certain something else… Oh, wait, you won't do that – then you can't call yourself gay and be a social distortion!"
"Why you little…" I heard someone mutter, before that someone had Damion pinned to the ground and was hitting him.
"Craig, don't..stop! This is what he wants, can't you see? He wants to piss us off… please, Craig..STOP!!" I pulled him away from Damion.
Damion smirked, despite his bleeding lip. "You'll pay for this – both of you, and dearly! And you –" he pointed towards Craig. "Keep your fag germs away from me!" He smirked again, and strutted past us.
I looked at Craig. He was still fuming.
"It was not my fault," I said. Judy must have told her, I assumed. "This loser of a guy was picking on me, and Craig beat him, kind of..and, well…as I said, it was not my fault." I did not long to go into details. I still had not told my parents that I was gay.
"Okay, fine.." she said. "I shall not ask you to tell me why he had been picking on you, am sure you can handle it. But can you tell us why you have been so..for want of a better word, off..to be honest, I was getting very worried."
I seemed better, so I should have been expecting the question. But, still – I might have been alright, but I was not ready to speak of all my secrets, because some things for now had to remain as they were – as secrets.
"Mom, please don't be so interrogative..now. Am trying to eat." Believe it or not, that was Judy. I guess, though it was she who was dating my man, it was not really her fault. She deserved him, she was so good.
And, possibly – I was not.
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