hey guys...i wasn't sure i was going to post this, because i've come to find that even without fans fictionpress pressures you to write fast, and concise in a way i don't want to write. But I'm a criticism adict, and I want to know what you guys think. Please review...if no one does, I probably won't post anymore.

Extra Note: This has been edited for grammar, not content

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A light breeze ruffled Vieve’s long, dark, hair as she strolled through the market in the middle of town. The sounds of haggling, talking, and laughing brought a gentle smirk to her features, and she watched her towns fellows peacefully. All around her, people rushed around, pulling wagons, scolding mischief prone children, and shopping for wares. The bustle made Vieve feel like an island of peace in the middle of a raging sea.

The market was a dusty area, full of shades of brown, but it held more life than anywhere else in Kidrik. Kids laughed and played tag as their parents bargained with sellers, who were in turn keeping up carts full of food and booths of handmade trinkets. Around the people’s feet ran animals of all kind: dogs, mostly strays, chickens, piglets, cats, and thousands of pigeons. And, though it was midwinter, it was hot in the crowded area. Vieve's shirt was held together in the back by only crisscrossing straps, and she could feel the sun burning the bare skin there.

Ducking around an overfull cart of fruit, Vieve found herself in a section known to sell exotic foods. She had spent the past hour searching for frustrating items on a list provided by their cook. The last one was avoiding her. With relief, she finally spotted a stall that sold tofu; a wooden one with a red and blue canopy. She sauntered up to the man who was watching her warily.

“How much for the tofu, sir?” she asked in her quiet, velvety tone. The seller, a gruff looking man with a long black beard, looked at her suspiciously. It was a look she was well accustomed to.

“Can ye pay us?” he asked in a merchant’s accent.

Vieve looked at the man scornfully. “Of course,” she scoffed, her voice stronger. Pulling out her purse, she showed him a few coins. “Did you doubt it?”

The sight of the money lightened the man’s tone considerably. “Ahhh…no. No doubts, miss. That tofu’s a silver a block, it is.” Vieve smirked at the apology in his voice, but handed the man two coins and took her purchase. She could feel the man’s eyes on her back as she walked away, but ignored them.

Vieve was also aware, as she walked back into the main market, of the stares she received. In any other situation, the staring would have made the shy girl uncomfortable, but she was accustomed to the suspicions that ran rampant in the market.

A farming community, Kidrik’s outdoor market was a trait that most other towns did not possess. People came from miles around to shop and peddle wares in the dusty streets. Vieve had loved the friendly competition that drove the sales since she was young, though she had lived with the suspicious stares her entire life. It was part of her lineage.

Suddenly, from behind her, a loud voice addressed Vieve. “Oy! Gypsy, hey! Come o’here to steal our wares, now? Come back, have ya?” For some reason, the accusation made Vieve flush and quicken her pace. She stared straight ahead, because she knew the man. It was the same crude farmer who accosted her every time she passed his stall. For an unknown reason, the man picked on Vieve alone—no one else from her clan was ever verbally abused.

The legacy left by her thieving ancestors haunted her daily.

Now, Vieve turned her quickened pace towards the center of town, where the community courts were. Her older brother, Bastion, played on a local basketball team, and they had a game today. She had promised to be there because no one else in the family could make it.

After a few minutes, and when she was almost to the edge of the market, Vieve’s slow, graceful lope returned. She reflexively looked toward the Marcellus clan’s booth to see who was working today, and saw with relief that it was Meggie.

Her family, and her clan for that matter, hated the Marcellus’. To consort with one was the worst of treasons. The rivalry went back too far for any one to care to remember.

But Vieve had a secret that would make her mother faint. As tradition, members of the two clans would stop at the rival’s stall to check out the competition when in the area. However, because she had stopped so many times, Vieve had developed a shaky friendship with Meggie, the woman who often worked there. They had taken up talking on one of Vieve’s frequent visits, and gradually grown acquainted.

Strolling toward Meggie’s stand, Vieve saw that she was talking to a young gypsy Vieve had never seen before. She was so occupied with trying to get a good look at the stranger that she tripped over a loose chicken, sprawling into a nearby stand.

“Watch it!” The owner cried angrily. She had a thick accent, like she had come from out of town. Vieve mumbled an apology and quickly helped her pick everything up.

The commotion made Meggie look up from her conversation, and she called out to Vieve, with laughter in her voice. “Vieve, darling! Come over here before you hurt yourself!”

Vieve dusted herself off, blushing furiously. Her cheeks were still red when she reached Meggie, who laughed and said, “Don’t be embarrassed, dear. I wanted you to meet my son here, Sira.” Meggie was a thin woman with a sweet, round face. She smiled kindly at Vieve.

“Alright,” Vieve said quietly. “But I can’t stay long, because Bastion…” Vieve trailed off, having looked at the boy for the first time. She flinched at his sheer beauty. Unruly dark hair fell over a chiseled face, and skin dark as any Marcellus. For a few moments, she gaped at his profile, until he turned to look at her. She received an electric shock at his eye’s contact. Almost black pools gazed at her in surprise, from underneath narrow brows. There was a dimension to those eyes that she didn’t understand; they seemed to see past her. His cheekbones were high, and made him look mysterious; sad in a way, but friendly. Vieve took an embarassed note of the corded muscles under his tshirt. He was thin, but quietly toned. After a few moments, she remembered herself and concluded weakly, “…has a game.” She looked away quickly and shook her head to clear her thoughts. This boy had caught her off guard.

“That’s quite alright, I just wanted to introduce you to Sira. Don’t worry,” Meggie finished conspiratorially, “He doesn’t mind our friendship.”

At this, Vieve warily looked back at the beautiful boy. He really didn’t mind? Unwittingly, she made eye contact with him again, and almost cringed. His black eyes seared into her own, unreadable, although Vieve thought he was expecting something. It made her extremely self concious, feeling as if she was supposed to say something. For a pregnant moment, an alarming tension stretched between them, but soon his pale lips curved upward into an inviting smile, and he said, “Nice to meet you.”

Vieve shivered slightly at his voice—it was menacing and appealing at the same time. “And you too.” she said, her own voice wavering.

“Are you alright?” He breathed, the sound shocking her again. It seemed to be portraying some great emotion that she couldn’t grasp.

A nervous giggle escaped her lips. “I think so.” Vieve averted her eyes, watching Meggie, who was seemingly unaware of the bizarre atmosphere between Vieve and her son. “I just wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

He opened his mouth to say something, but suddenly, the church bells rang in the distance. It was three o’clock, and Bastion’s game began in fifteen minutes. “I have to go,” Vieve said regretfully. “Goodbye, Meggie. Goodbye…Sira.” Meggie waved to her as Vieve walked away, unsettled. The exchange had been strange, to say the least. She could feel Sira’s eyes on her back, and she wanted to know in a bad way what he was thinking. The tension between them was beginning to fade from her memory, though it had seemed so real at the time. Had she been imagining it?

The conversation stayed at the back of her mind as she wove through pigeons on her way to the gym in the center of town.

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poll: Should she meet Sira in the first chapter? Please give opinions!