History Notes

The Last Tuesday

Jaclyn Ortiz

I stayed home from school ‘sick’ for a while. Even though I wasn’t actually sick, I felt like I was. The stress was really getting to me. It was mostly Aralin, and the fact my grades were starting to slip from how things have been going and then there was Jessica ignoring me and the fact that cheerleading competition was coming up in a month and I have to be passing to do that.

While I was home I got to call my mom during the afternoon. I finally got use to calling her mom and not Sandra. She was really nice. I had explained to her my little break down when we had went to visit and she just told me she understood. She didn’t freak out about me having a girlfriend or anything and encouraged me to tell Aunt Delilah and Uncle Matthew that the whole Aralin things is what has been bothering me, but I don’t think I could do that just yet. Maybe tell Uncle Matthew but not Aunt Delilah. Who knows?

Anyways, Sandra – or mom- has said she wants to have a lunch date some time soon. I’m really stoked about it too! It’s been so long since I’ve spent time with her. Actually, I don’t think we ever really spent time together. Only times when I’d stay up till late hours of the night making sure she didn’t burn down the house with her cigarette or stay by her side after Albert, my dad, beat her as she cried herself to sleep. They weren’t pleasant memories. Oh but the ones about the Fourth of July were nice. I almost forgot about those. We’d talk about them too saying we should have another one sometime.

There were moments where I wanted to ask about Albert but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Even now when I think about him, I feel this hatred, this sadness and resentment. It almost feels like everything that happened was just a dream. I mean, how could a father do that to his child? Telling Aralin about it made me really think about it. I had kept it in so long it almost didn’t affect me but once it was out I couldn’t just let it off like I had for so long. Still, I never brought him up. Not just for me, but I don’t think mom would like to hear about him. Heck, I don’t even know if she knows all he did to me.

The times I wasn’t on the phone were spent thinking. I tried my hardest not to thinking about Aralin but I couldn’t help myself. I couldn’t believe she said no. I forgave her for cheating on me with Christi. It was a screw up, we all have them, and I didn’t care. I just wanted her. She brought out the best of me and opened me up. I didn’t understand what she meant by not being truthful with me. She could do that now. I really had no solid explanation to why she really said no and that drove me insane.

“I’m home!” Called Uncle Matthew as soon as he came through the door. I hurried down the hall hearing bags and took a few groceries from him. “Are you feeling better?” He asks unpacking a head of lettuce, which meant sub sandwiches for dinner.

I shrug setting a jug of milk in the fridge. “Yeah, I guess so. Better then before.”

“That’s good. I bought some Juice pops. I know how you liked them when you were younger.”

“And still do!” I smile taking out a strawberry one. Oh how I love these things. “I talked to mom today. She wants to have a lunch date some time soon. Is that okay?”

“I don’t see why not.” Says Uncle Matt putting up the last of the groceries. “It’s good to know you and Sandra are getting along so well. Your Aunt and I were worried.”

“Why?” I ask following him to the back porch after he got his own juice pop.

“It’s just been so long, you know. We didn’t know how you’d react.” He pauses wiping a dot of orange from his mustache. “But you seem to like her.”

“Are you kidding? I love her! I really did miss her all this time.” This draws a smile and I can’t help but beam. “I can’t wait until we get to live together again.”

“Mhm.” Uncle Matthew nods sucking on his orange Popsicle again. “She’ll be out of there sooner then you know. Will come to live with us for a while until she can support herself again and she’ll need you to keep an eye on her.”

“Of course.”

Okay. Now would be the perfect time to explain what has really gotten me so down. I could just tell him I’ve already talked to Sandra mom (I can’t decide which to say yet) about it and then say it. Just let it out. Okay, here goes.

“Uncle Matthew,” I start and I know he can see me shaking already.

“Yes, Jaccy?”

Just take a deep breath and say it. Slowly now. “I was talking to mom about how I haven’t been feeling too good and the fact is-“ The phone ringing cuts off my sentence and I bolt off to answer it relieved.

I was surprised to hear Jessica’s voice but also terrified at how she sounded. “Jessica, calm down, what’s going on? You’re dad is what? Oh no, oh no, oh god, I’ll be there as soon as I can. No Jess I’m coming down there right now.”

Without even saying bye, I hang up and run outside to where Uncle Matt is sitting confused. “Who was that?”

“It was Jessica. Her dad is in the hospital.”

And without any more explanation he says, “Lets go.”

--

The ride to the hospital was quiet. I guessed Uncle Matthew forgot about our talk earlier and I was thankful. I don’t think I can do it just yet. Maybe I’ll tell when I’m with mom and she can help me through it. Good idea, Jaclyn.

I dreaded that hospital smell of antibacterial, sickness, and crappy cafeteria food. It made me uneasy. The last time I was in a hospital was when mom overdosed on sleeping pills and Albert really laid it on her for it. Of course he told the doctors he didn’t know what happened to her and threatened me not to say a word. Still, it all seemed like a dream.

Walking into the waiting room I saw Calyssto, Lawree, and Flor sitting there and was about to go over to them when Jessica came running to me engulfing me in a king size hug crying. I couldn’t believe it. Jessica was crying?! Usually it’s me running into her arms balling my eyes out, but not this time. After a while she pulled away from me wiping tears off on her sleeve.

“Jac,” She coughs running a hand over her bandana. “Jac, he’s not doin good. He’s jus hangin’ on. They don’t know if he’ll make it or not.”

“What happened?” Asks Matthew since I was unable to form any words still in disbelief.

“He was down at Ricochet Bar with some friends when a fight broke out between his group and some others. One pulled out a gun and started shooting.” She stops for a moment trying her hardest to hold back more tears. “He got shot once in the chest and another in the leg. They’ve tried their best to stop the bleeding but it’s gotten into his lungs.”

“Oh Jessica.” I say hugging her again.

“I can’t believe it., first mom and now him.” I almost forgot about her mom. “I can’t loose him, Jaclyn. He’s all I got. He taught me everything, raised me. I can’t loose him.”

“Jessica.” I start crying myself knowing the feeling of loosing a loved one. Well not the way she has but the fact that one is getting taken away. I just pray that he won’t go. Jessica is the strong one. If just her dad getting shot makes her go off, having him die would wreck her completely.

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