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So, this is my final exam from creative writing. D
I enjoyed writing it. Please enjoy.
Dear Diary
Monday,
March 21
Biology
1:27
PM
Ok, today is the day. Today will be the day that I take notes from Mrs. L’s lecture and possibly pass biology with something higher than a C. Yes, today, I will take the initiative.
Don’t give me that look. You know I hate when you wrinkle your pages at me like that.
Seriously, I’m going to do it.
I mean, it’s only the back of his head. It’s not nearly as beautiful and perfect as the front, where his beautiful, green eyes are perfectly placed above his straight nose and gorgeous mouth, and his dark, shiny hair falls over those green eyes that just look straight into your soul.
Please don’t wrinkle at me again.
I know you’ve had many, many descriptions of Jack Carlisle. I’m sorry. I’ll try to stop.
The Golgi Apparatus is a structure in the cell. It is shaped like a stack of pancakes.
Shaped like a stack of pancakes. Wonderful. This is why I’m failing biology.
Had a quiz on cells today. Failed it because it actually asked me what the Golgi Apparatus does rather than which breakfast food it resembles.
Jack saw me scribbling furiously on the essay question (describe the function of either the lysosomes, ribosomes, or the Golgi Apparatus) and so he obviously thought I knew what I was doing. Which I didn’t, I was writing a very long explanation as to why I had no idea what any of them did and that maybe she should try telling us their purpose instead of what they look like.
Conversation went like this:
Jack: Hey, Jenna.
Jenna: Merp. (I have no idea what “merp” means.)
Jack: (Insert funny look at the merp-ing Jenna) How do you think you did?
Jenna: Oh, yeah, I think I passed. (Lie)
Jack: I saw you writing a lot. Did you write about the lysosomes? Those were the easiest, since, you know, all they do is clean the cell. (...Crap.)
Jenna: Oh, no, I did the Golgi Apparatus (insert cute and flirtatious-type laugh).
Jack: (Surprise) Really? I didn’t know you were that good at science! You looked pretty intense.
Jenna: Oh, well, yeah, I mean, who doesn’t love pancakes? (What the heck?!)
Jack: (Insert yet another funny look at the idiot standing next to himnamed Jenna) Uh, yeah. (Insert a laugh)
Jenna: Well, I mean, that’s how she described them in the notes and so...I have to get to English, see you later. (Jenna bolts from the area before she starts to hyperventilate)
Stop with that haha-I-told-you-that-you-suck look, missy. I could throw you away at any moment.
Except you are the only one who understands.
BUT STILL.
I could get a new you if I wanted to.
Jack asked me if I was writing a story today. I managed to come up with a witty “Yeah, story of my life.”
And he actually laughed! Not in the I’m-laughing-at-this-retarded-weird-chick-who-I’ve-known-since-second-grade-and-feel-obliged-to-laugh-at-her-stupidity kind of laugh, but like an I-actually-thought-it-was-funny type laugh! I thought that was worth mentioning.
Only plant cells have a cell wall.
Yeah, like I’m gonna remember that in a week.
My mother’s told me that, if I don’t start passing biology with at least a B, she’s taking my collection of Sharpies away. You know how I feel about those, especially since that’s what I used to decorate you.
She told me to ask Mrs. L for help. Can’t you just see that conversation?
Jenna: Hi, Mrs. L.
Mrs. L: Jennifer! Can I help you?
Jenna: (Doesn’t correct name) Can I have some extra help? Maybe after school?
Mrs. L: Of course! You can bring your notes and we’ll go over them with highlighters and take more!
Jenna: (Doesn’t have notes, hence the failure) Yeah...that’ll be great (lie). Thanks, Mrs. L.
So, you see, I’m kind of stuck. Because either I get in trouble from Mrs. L for staring at the back of Jack’s head or I get my Sharpies taken away for staring at the back of Jack’s head. Either way, it’s all Jack’s fault. So he should be the one helping me.
Obviously.
I’m waiting for her to tell us we should begin on our homework for tomorrow, and then I’ll ask him. She’s still going on and on about the cell wall. Only animals have that, right?
I DID IT! WRINKLE YOUR PAGES IN PRIDE! WE GET TO KEEP THE SHARPIES. Though I hid our favorite maroon one so my mom couldn’t get it even if she tried.
Anyway. I ASKED JACK CARLISLE FOR BIOLOGY HELP.
He grinned(!) and was like “Yeah, sure, Jenna, I’d love to!”
Which is rad beyond all belief.
Sharpies and Jack Carlisle.
Maybe this year isn’t so bad after all.
He forgot something in his locker and went to go get it before they close the buildings, so I’m taking a time to give us an update before he comes back and I forget from the sheer Jack Carlisle of it all.
First, he asks me if I want to study somewhere other than school, because he can drive us. I said no, the only other place I’d study is at my house and my mom would freak if I brought a strange guy home. He pointed out that he’d been to my house before. I reminded him that the last time was in the third grade, which was the last year that I had invited my entire class to my birthday party. He conceded, so we stayed in the library.
Then he tells me to take out my notes. Since I’ve written all five sentences of notes that I’ve ever taken in here, I had to tell him that I don’t have any.
“You don’t take notes?” he asked. I’m such a bad liar.
“Not very many.”
“Well, where are they?” I’m still a bad liar.
“In my diary.”
“Oh.” So he pulled out his own. And told me to copy them. There were about eight hundred pages. And he writes small! I’m actually copying them into my empty biology notebook so that I don’t inundate you with things about cells and DNA and animal porn.
Don’t ask about the animal porn.
I must have had something really important to tell you that day.
He’s coming back. Oh my god. He has a feast! He’s so the greatest tutor ever.
Still copying. He went to throw out the remnants of our snack. And he wouldn’t let me pay him back. God. I never realized how much of a gentleman he is.
You know what’s really nice about him? Instead of being like “the Golgi Apparatus looks like pancakes,” he’s like “The Golgi Apparatus looks like pancakes and modifies proteins, transmits materials, and synchronizes things.” Isn’t that great? At the rate he’s going, by the time he gets to whatever it is we’re learning in class now, I’ll actually understand it! Or I’ll have memorized every word he’s said. But either way, that’s still passing.
This rocks.
Had an actual test for lots of points on cells today!
I think I passed it!
This is the most exciting day of the year!
After writing an intense and great essay on the Golgi Apparatus (Mrs. L likes to repeat questions from quizzes because it makes her feel like she taught us something), I beamed at the back of Jack’s head. And then I wrote at the bottom that Jack Carlisle deserves extra credit (if he needs it) for teaching me biology, because I didn’t want her to get a swelled head that it was her crap lecturing job that got me to pass.
Once the test was over, we had about five minutes after class to just chill. I was going to write all of that down then, but Jack actually stayed in his seat next to me instead of going to hang out with his posse. I can’t write while Jack is watching. His name’s mentioned every other word.
So anyway.
He turned around. Conversation as follows:
Jack: So, Jenna, how did you do?
Jenna: I PASSED! (Insert me beaminglike an idiot.
Jack: Awesome!
Jenna: (On a fit of spontaneity, gets out of chair and hugs him. No idea what this insane Jenna chick was thinking.) Thanks so much for tutoring me. (Sits back down and tries to keep face from turning maroon like our Sharpie.)Jack: No problem! But, you know, Jenna, fair is fair. You do owe me now.
Jenna: Of course. Do you need help in English or something? (I could so prove that I am not a complete idiot by flaunting my English prowess.)
Jack: Nah. I just want a date.
Jenna: (Blinks.) With who?
Jack: (Insert funny look) You, stupid. (Grin)
Jenna: (OH MY GOD) What? (Smooth. Real smooth.)
Jack: You can say no, if you want.
Jenna: You’re asking me on a date.
Jack: I am.
Jenna: (Brain finally returns.) No.
Jack: Oh, ok.
Jenna: I mean no, I don’t want to say no! (Nevermind about the brain returning.)
Jack: Oh! Well. Let’s go to the movies tonight. I’ll drive?
Jenna: I would love to!
HA, SEE? I AM NOT AN IDIOT.! Life is really starting to work out for us, isn’t it? And I won’t replace you. I promise.
Anyway.
Hope you enjoyed. Tell me what you thought?
