Part 1
I’m taking my time
Working my way through
This mess I’ve made
Turning around now
I’m heading towards you.

Help me Father
I can’t do it alone
You’re all I have left
Give me the strength
To keep pushing forward.

So weak, so scared
Please don’t leave me
At every corner he’s there
Surrounding me with
My childhood demons.

No place to hide
No where to run
He haunts the shadows.
Lurking as the ghosts
That worry my every step.

Battling my defenses
Until they break down
Help me God! Please!
I don’t know what to do
I’m on broken knees now.

Trying to get away from him
I’m running anywhere
Just to feel safe again.
Where are you God?
Why aren’t you here for me?

Forgive me Father
I gave up, gave in
I couldn’t handle it.
His leering face,
The mocking laughter.

Now I can’t stop
The hideous crimes
I have committed.
Their lifeless eyes
Always ask why, why…

Tormented night after night
By haunting nightmares
All those trusting faces
Frozen in looks of shock
The blood stains my hands.

The derision will not end
Every night is a
Sleepless night.
Endless…Eternal…Agony
He gives me no rest!

Lord, where are you?!
Why are you not here, beside me?
I’ve followed you with child-like faith
Now you scorn me?
Like you cast away your only son?

Part 2
I’ve stopped running now
I’ve come to my decision
That its now time to face
My inner demons, and
Eternal damnation in hell.

I’ll never win this battle alone
Satan’s good at one thing –
Letting you know
What you can’t do.
My life’s nearing its end.

But before all is gone
I’d like to pray once more
Though it is useless
You would never listen
To a sinner like me.

Yet just the same
I needed you to know
I can’t stand this thing
That I’ve become inside
And I’m ready for a change.

Father if you would,
Could just hear my cry
I don’t know if you
Are truly here at all or
If there is any hope left.

But I want to believe
That there is more
To this thing called life.
That there is a purpose
For my own existence.

There you go, Father
I’ve laid my life down,
All my hopes, dreams,
Desires, aspirations…
Now, what will you do?

Will you grant me mercy?
And give me another chance?
Will I be able to overcome
This twisted past of mine?
Or will hell claim me forever?

My voice has been silenced,
My throat dry and choked as
Though I’ve been screaming for hours
When I’ve only been able to whisper
Nobody is here and it’s all too quiet…