I am owned by Lord Jade Quinn and before that I belonged to his father and that is always the way it has been. My mother was a maid for the former lord and died giving birth to me and since my father was only around long enough to donate sperm to my mother, I was taken in by the lord’s wife and I suppose I began to belong to Lord Jade then too.

I was his plaything from the very beginning. Being five years older than I, he’s always seemed to enjoy treating me as his toy and he’s gotten away with it because of his size, age, and authority. As a baby, I was just something for him to poke at and laugh at when I began to cry…so I’ve heard the other servants say as they shake their heads and roll their eyes. As I got older he began to enjoy dressing me up in ridiculous costumes and having me do things that got me in trouble, which would allow him to sit back and laugh at me.

When Lord Jade’s father died when Lord Jade was seventeen, I became more than just a toy. I developed into his sex toy. At first I was humiliated and he seemed to enjoy that and so as I got older, I forced myself to become accustomed to his devious nature and now that I’m twenty, bending over the nearest table and dropping my pants or crawling across the floor to kiss Lord Jade’s feet have become habitual. They’ve become normal. He owns me and I submit to him.

And right now I am tied to his bedposts with thin strips of cloth, spread-eagled and naked, whimpering for him to touch me. Yes. It’s natural.

“Morgan,” Jade murmurs my name, pacing slowly at the foot of the bed. “Morgan, what do you want me to do?”

I’ve always considered myself a levelheaded person, but when Lord Jade gets me like this, the only thing I can think of is his body…of the ache of my body…of his body easing the ache of my body…and so I choke out a strangled whisper of, “You… I want you to touch me…” I hold my breath as his hand lowers down, but just barely avoids touching me. I attempt to push myself from the bed to make contact with him, but he moves away and sneers down at me from behind his well-groomed long dark hair.

“Now, now, Morgan. What have I told you about being so hasty? I think I might have to teach you a lesson.” His lips curl back even more and I pant, shaking my head.

“No. No, I’m sorry.” When he teaches me lessons, they are never good ones and they always bring me back to that stage of humiliation that used to plague me when I was still that naïve twelve year old he decided to take to his bed.

“I think you do.” He bends down and picks up something and I watch him through wide eyes, not sure what he’s retrieving. A crop perhaps…? But no. No, he has his shirt in his hand and I watch him put it on, confused. “As you know, Morgan, my twenty-sixth birthday is coming up,” he says as he buttons his shirt and I nod at him slowly. “I have business to conduct in regards to my birthday present that the land’s generous tax payers are providing for me. I’ve already called up a maid to come in here and clean up…so they should be in here in about a half hour. I’ll be back later tonight and we may continue, depending on my mood.” I watch him slip on his shoes through a lust-hazed gaze and shake my head.

“Wait. You can’t leave me tied up like this!” I cry out as his hand falls on the bedroom door’s doorknob. “Please, my lord. Please no…” I know that the other servants talk about me behind my back. I know they look at me through the corners of their eyes and whisper when I walk by. I know they think that I’m disgusting and filthy and at times like these I really do not blame them, but I also don’t want to be found by one like this…in this state… I don’t want to provide them with anymore ammo. “Please…”

Jade smiles at me slightly, blows a kiss in my general direction, and slips out of his bedroom, leaving me tied up and sobbing.

Sure enough, a half hour later passes, and a maid slips into the room, blanching at the sight of me. I turn my head from her and hide my reddened face among the pillows beneath me. She silently unties me with warm, gentle hands and I immediately pull myself into fetal position, trembling as I’m filled with the deepest feeling of embarrassment I have ever suffered through. What would my mother say if she was still alive and had been the one ordered to come in here and untie me? What have I turned in to? What have I become? I’m no better than trolls or dwarves. I’m a monster.

“You don’t need to cry,” she whispers, surprising me into jumping. “I won’t tell the others. You should get up and get dressed before you catch a cold though, and I’ll make the bed.”

I peek over my shoulder at her and she’s smiling at me as if I’m not naked and shivering before her. “You… Thank you…” I force myself to mutter as I slide out of bed and collect my clothing, hurriedly slipping into it. “You’re not like the rest.”

She smiles and shrugs, pausing from tucking in sheets when I glance over at her. “Everyone has a heart. I just choose to make mine known. And you seem like a kind young man yourself.” She chatters away as she tidies up the room, working around me as I stand frozen yet fidgeting in the middle of the room. “My name’s Lucinda! You know… The rumor mill at this place is unbelievable. I’ve heard plenty of things about you and the lord that made me very questionable about getting a job here, but you both have been nothing but nice to me. Oh, and I’ve heard the most insane things about Lord Quinn’s birthday gift. People have been talking about faeries and leprechauns’ gold… Although that would be amazing, I don’t really think it’s possible. I’ve also been snooping around a little bit…just out of curiosity, you see, and Lord Quinn’s been making a strange room in the basement…”

“Can you bring me there?” I cut her off. She’s friendly and friendly means that we can potentially be friends. I want to be her friend and I’ve also been wanting to know more about Jade’s birthday present for the past months.

“Sure!” She grabs me by the hand and I stare at it in awe, not used to kind human contact from anyone other than Jade (and half the time it’s not even really that kind…). I let her pull me from the room and down two flights of stairs until we’re in the basement, at the very end of the long, cold corridor. There she creeps up to the double doors that have been put in at the end of the hall and gets on her hands and knees to look through the crack underneath the doors.

I fall to my knees and look in too, but all I can see is carpet…and then water. “How…how is that possible?” I whisper. “There’s a wall of water…but the carpet’s dry. Is it magic?”

Lucinda lets out a giggle and shakes her head, her mop of brown hair falling into her face. “No, silly! It’s glass…like on the windows. I’m guessing you’ve never seen an aquarium before. See, I don’t see why he’d need that much water… Unless he wanted to get a mermaid but I don’t think that’s possi—” Her words are cut off as she yelps and is dragged to her feet by a hand that’s tangled in her hair. I follow the long fingers embedded into her hair up to a hand and a wrist and an arm and that arm is the arm of Jade.

“You, darling little girl, are fired. And you, Morgan, may come in here.” He lets go of Lucinda, giving her a shove and I shoot her an apologizing look as Jade herds me into the room I was just peeking in to. I feel regretful for getting Lucinda fired…especially because she was so kind to me…but I’m more concerned for myself right now as Jade gives me a shove and I land on my knees on the lush red carpet that fills the empty, cold room.

I stare at the water sloshing in the empty tank in front of me. There’s a patch of weeds at the bottom and what appears to be real sand. Behind all of that and near the top of the cage comes light from what seems to be outside in the courtyard of the mansion.

“So what is it…?” I ask quietly.

“Did I ask you to speak?” Jade quietly asks, walking past me to approach the tank. He puts his fingers against the glass and I crawl forward.

“No, sir. I’m sorry…”

“You’re forgiven. And what is it? It’s an aquarium. Your little friend in the hallway was almost correct. I do want a merperson for my birthday and I am getting one… Just not a mermaid. I’m getting a merman.”

“How is that possible…?” I ask and my voice echoes in the room, causing me to flinch and lower myself to the floor even more.

Jade turns to me and smiles widely. “I’ve bought one of course. Merfolk seem to have no qualms about treating their people like whores. He’ll be arriving sometime tomorrow. I expect you to stay out of the way, of course.” I nod and listen to him talk about the business procedures he went through to get this merman and eventually he’s leading me back upstairs and to his bed and we’re continuing what my hastiness interrupted earlier.

-

I’m woken gently by Jade and he’s grinning at me, a wide genuine grin and I blink up at him, confused.

“What’s the matter?” I croak, rubbing at my tired eyes and he shakes his head.

“Nothing. But my merman’s here. Come look at him, Morgan.” He grabs me by the hand, his grip strong and maybe too tight, his hands freezing and I nod, dragging myself from bed to sleepily follow him downstairs to the basement and the double doors. He unlocks the doors and yanks me through and I blink blearily at the glass, not seeing anything for the longest time until my eyes become adjusted and I spot it…him…there…behind the weeds.

He’s beautiful. I always considered Lord Jade to be the most beautiful man around but this merman is breathtaking. His body is strong and sculpted and his skin’s an almost pearly color. His hair is a light shade…a pinkish white perhaps and his eyes are large and dark and afraid.

“He’s good-looking, isn’t he?” Jade asks and I give a noncommittal shrug so I might keep my feelings to myself and Jade’s jealous anger away from me. “Yes, I think he is. He doesn’t seem very tame though, and he doesn’t appear to know English, but he’s a good investment. Just think of how jealous other lords will be…” He continues to boast about his newest possession and I stare at the merman, melancholy and anxious. Since Jade has this new belonging perhaps he’ll get sick of me and I’d be kicked out to be completely alone.

-

I can’t sleep and Jade is away, visiting someone in a nearby territory. For some reason I find myself slipping out of bed and padding down to the basement and that long stretch of endless hallway till I’m in front of those double doors, aching to get in, but they’re locked. I sigh dejectedly, ready to trudge back to my room until I remember that I saw light from the courtyard the first time I came down here, and before I know it, I’m sprinting upstairs and outside, into the courtyard.

The sound of sloshing water is heard through the still night silence and I follow it to an overgrown rose bush. Poking through the leaves and thorns and rosebuds reveals a small patch of what looks like rock and tucking myself into my pajamas, I step through the rose plant and drop down into the rock.

I stumble to my feet and glance around. I’m on the other side of the glass and right at my feet is the water’s edge…and staring right into my eyes is the merman. I flinch and back away from him, hitting my head against the stone backing behind me as he surveys me with curious, fearful eyes.

“H-hi,” I whisper and raise a hand to wave at him. He winces at my words and swims farther down and away from me, but his eyes do not leave mine. “My name’s Morgan!” I call down to him, crawling closer to the water’s edge. He swims to the surface, keeping his back to the glass, and cocks his head to the side. English. That’s right. Jade said he didn’t seem to know English. I point to myself. “I’m Morgan.” I point at him now. “You’re…”

He points to his chest and opens his mouth slowly. “Malleo.” He smiles, revealing pearl white pointed teeth. “I know your language,” he says it slowly, his voice thick with an accent and stumbling over the words slightly but he makes it through the sentence, looking pleased with himself. “I’m…afraid of the others. You…you look kind…with kind eyes.”

My breath is stuck in my throat. His voice is as beautiful as his looks and I reflect upon the fact that Jade’s voice is always hard and cold. “How…how are you?”

He laughs a musical laugh made of chimes and bells and I let myself laugh with him. And that’s how our friendship began.

-

My nightly visits to Malleo continued for several months after that. We talked. He sang. Sometimes I read to him or sometimes we just sat in a comfortable, companionable silence. It was just what I assumed was a normal friendship…if a merman befriending a human servant boy’s considered normal…and tonight I sit with my legs dipped in the water as he floats languidly beneath me.

“Can you swim?” he asks suddenly and I jump, nearly dropping the book that’s propped in my lap.

“No… I’ve been too busy around here to ever learn.” I set down the book and stare down at Malleo, my eyes scanning over his chest where a white shining scar is from a fight he got into with a giant squid.

“Would you like to learn?” I grin, shrug, and then finally give a decided nod. “Good. Now take off your clothes.”

I hesitate, drawing my feet out of the water. “I don’t know…” There are bruises and scars and rope burns along my whole body, left behind from Jade and his devious escapades with me.

“You’ve seen me without clothes on plenty of times,” Malleo jokes and I crack a smile at him.

“Okay. Fine…” With one more nod, I stand and quickly shed my clothing, slipping into the water and clutching onto the stone ledge with all my might.

“All right. Now let go and grab on to me instead,” Malleo quietly instructs and I quickly obey, amazed that I don’t sink like a rock in the brief moment that I’m switching my hold from rock to soft, slippery, strong skin. “Tonight we’ll just do this. Take a deep breath and I’ll swim under with you. When you need air, just tap my shoulder and I’ll bring you back up.”

I nod and stare at him, my blue eyes magnetically drawn to his black ones like the first night we met. My fingers clutch onto his shoulders so tightly I’m sure it hurts him and I wrap my legs around his waist, wincing at the odd feeling of the scales of his pinkish colored tail brush against my heels. I count to three and take a deep breath and then Malleo’s bringing me underwater and I feel like I’m weightless.

He does spirals and flips in the water and I hold on for dear life while I enjoy the feeling…but more than the feeling of the water hugging me and holding me, I love the sensation of Malleo’s long hair brushing against my face and his muscles beneath my fingers. I hold my breath until my head aches and I feel so much pressure before I finally tap on Malleo’s shoulder and he brings me to the surface.

“Are you all right?” he asks me, looking concerned as I gasp for air and I nod.

“Can we do it again? Please?” He grins and obeys and this time as we get down into the water I find myself opening my eyes despite the sting and pressing my lips against Malleo’s dark pink ones despite my worry of rejection and guilty remembrance toward sleeping Jade. The merman jumps and I do too before I let my tongue taste his lips, taste the inside of his mouth. I let my hands loosen from his shoulders to run over his chest, absorbing the hardness of his muscles. I let my hips rock against his abdomen and a moan leaks from his mouth, reverberating in the glass tank around us.

I’ve lost myself in him. At the moment there is no Jade. There was no Lucinda. There’s no servitude or glass surrounding us. There’s nothing at all but the two of us and I want it to last forever but I’m running out of oxygen once more. We break the surface of the water and I gasp for air before attacking Malleo’s mouth once more.

“I love you,” I whisper when I finally tear myself away, my breath hot, my lips hot, my whole body hot despite the cool temperature of the tank. “I love you so much.”

Malleo shivers against me and he buries his face in the crook of my neck. “I love you too, Morgan... More than anything… I lost all I used to love. You’re the only thing I have now.”

-

Jade’s furious as he marches in front of me, shoving me against the bed. “Where were you last night?” he demands, the palm of his hand smacking against the seat of my pants. I cry out and bite my lip. Last night I was with Malleo again. His mouth…his warm wet mouth…gently licking and sucking every part of me. It felt so good. Jade spanks me again. This does not feel good anymore.

“I was just in the bathroom, Lord Jade,” I whimper. “I felt sick in the middle of the night… I’m sorry.”

He sighs and backs away from me. “Fine. That’s fine.” He shoves his hair from his eyes and rubs at his chin. “I’ve heard, though, from other servants that you’ve been poking around near the merman’s tank. Someone saw you heading down to the basement the other day.” That’s a lie. I never go to Malleo that way. I always go through the rose bush. The other servants hate me. They gossip and now Jade’s been told a lie. “I was thinking about it…about the merman then… He must be bored all day, I’m thinking.” I peek over my shoulder and shrug. He has mentioned that but he does like to sleep during the day. “Why don’t the two of us entertain it, since you seem to be interested in it.”

“What…?” I sit up and he grabs me by the hair, jerking me away from the bed and throwing me against the door. “Wait, Lord Jade. What are you planning?”

“Just shut up and get downstairs.” He shoves me and I force my feet to inch forward till I’m finally trudging slowly to the basement. When we get to the double doors, Jade unlocks them and shoves me through but when I land on my knees, he yanks me up again and continues to push me toward the tank.

Malleo’s hidden in the weeds, appearing to be asleep and I take a deep breath, glad that he is. Jade gives me one more push and I hit the glass, my palms catching me before my face smashes into it. I gasp as my pants are jerked down to my knees and I struggle to get away.

“No, my lord! We can’t do this here!” I hiss and he laughs.

“Why not? Are you embarrassed of an audience? Well, don’t worry about it. He’s just an idiot fish and he looks like he’s asleep anyway. Scream for me. Wake him up.”

Jade’s wetted fingers probe at my ass and I cry out as they jab inside me none too gently. They move in and out…quickly…painfully and then they’re gone and I feel his erection, hot and hard pushing into me instead. I cry out and my voice echoes and inside the tank Malleo stirs. No… Please…no… I squeeze my eyes shut as Jade begins to thrust and grope at my own member, coaxing it till it’s as hard as his. No… No more… Please… Stop…

I feel strange and my eyes slide open to stare into the blackness of Malleo’s irises and pupils on the other side of the glass. His hands are matched up with mine, his face mirroring my own and I’ve never seen such sadness before. Never. I open my mouth to murmur a silent apology, but before I can move my lips I feel myself losing control and Jade’s coming inside of me as I reach orgasm myself, grasping for Malleo but only succeeding in smudging up the glass.

No… No…please no…

-

When Jade pulls himself from me and I finally am able to struggle to my feet I frown. Malleo’s nowhere to be seen. He’s hiding from me among the weeds… He doesn’t want to see me… I pull my pants up and button them, falling to my knees in front of the cage.

“What’s your problem?” Jade asks. “Come on. Let’s go.” He tugs me by the hair again and I don’t move. Instead I let him scoop me up like I’m just a child again and he lugs me upstairs to our bed. There I stay for the rest of the night and the following day and only when Jade fall asleep the next night do I find energy to leave the sheets.

The courtyard air is humid and still and I stumble along the uneven brick path to the rosebush but my feet slow and freeze as I see something wrong. No. No please no… I’m frozen and I can’t breathe before I’m running to the rosebush. Malleo’s among the blossoms and thorns, his face blue, his body still and pierced by the thorns. What did he do? Why would he do such a thing? Why would he pull himself so far away from the water? Because he knows…because he knows I’m a monster. He said I was his everything and then he saw his everything be taken in front of him by Jade. Jade and I…we’re not humans. We’re monsters.

I can’t breathe and there’s pressure in my head and I tap on Malleo’s shoulder for an escape from this suffocating lack of oxygen but he does not rise.

I bend down and rest my head against his spine, touching his long hair and weaving it through my fingers. He never taught me how to swim. I never ended up letting go of him. With a decided nod I shove Malleo’s still body back through the opening, petals and leaves raining down with him as I jump in after him. I wrap my arms around his shoulders and my legs around his waist as I shove us off from the rock. The water hugs us but we do no flips. We fall to the bottom of the tank and I press my lips against Malleo’s cold, still ones.

And before the water fills my lungs I find enough air to whisper, “You’re all that I had too.”