Breakdown

Panic ripping at my chest
Heart pounding
Could have mistook it for
cardiac arrest (I feel like I'm dying)

Sweat dripping at my forhead
Nails digging at my skull
Pulling out my hair
Eyes dancing about
Nervous glances all around
Oh yeah, I'm having a
major breakdown
Oh yeah, I'm having a nervous breakdown

What am I going to do?
I cry, I scream, I bleed,
I shout, what am I going to do?

My back against the wall
A sob escapes me
So does a salty tear
I shake my head and clench my fists
And my body slides down to the floor

As I cradle myself in a corner
More tears leak
Oh I'm so confused
My mind races (overload, breakdown)

What was I thinking? (I'm so lost)
I cry, I scream, I bleed,
I beg, what am I to do?

I can't avoid the inevitable
And it scares me
As I come to this
confession, a mere conclusion
to my thoughts
I bang my head against the wall
and more tears fall (just like me)

My fears
I wish them to leave me
but the only thing leaving
is my crying and this energy to fight
these thoughts
and they keep coming (headed for a breakdown)

What am I going to do?
I cry, I scream, I bleed,
I shout, What was I thinking?
I cry, I scream, I bleed
I beg, what am I to do?

I re-think how little my life is
how insignificant I am
how unimportant my
existance is

What's the use?
But even as I think I
should just end it all
My fear reminds me
why I'm still here--

The darkness scares me
for what happens at the end?

With that I sleep (Cause I'm on overload)
Hoping that I am to wake again (from this breakdown)