I’m lying down on my bed crying holding my phone to my heart. I just had a fight with my best friend. She betrayed me and told one of my greatest secrets to all of my friends. And just now she yelled at me for asking why she did it.

I toss the phone aside and walk to the bathroom. I look at my reflection in the mirror: tear streaks down my red face, hair disheveled and astray, eyes brimming with new tears. I open up the medicine cabinet and pull out one of my dad’s razor blades. I put it to my arm and cut into the flesh across my forearm. Blood and tears come from my body and collect in the sink.

Hours later I’m sitting in front of my computer. Tears still flow but the blood has long since stopped. But my arm hurts terribly; I don’t think the blade was clean. I log onto msn and see my ex-best friend on. I change my status to Appear Offline.

I look through the list again and I see Gradius is online. I remember him staying up with me one night when my dad was angry and tried to beat me. I eventually fell asleep in front of the computer. When I woke up he was still online talking to me thinking my dad broke down the door. He took two hours going through the things he’d do to my dad if he were here. I merely smiled and apologized for worrying him.

I send him a message:

“Hey, grad”

“yo”

“I’m having a bad day, I feel like killing myself”

“Wat!? Don’t do that”

And he went into full comfort mood. He spent two hours calming me down. He lived halfway across the country, but it always felt like he was here in my room with me. I don’t know why but he’s always the one who never turns me away. And I’ve developed a crush on him. And I can’t help but wonder if he likes me as well.

Tonight I can’t help but think he does. Because he just saved me from the hell I’m in, even if it was only for a few hours. He’s my life line, but I still wish he was here so I could feel his arms around me instead of just imagining them. But that’s never going to happen.

Two months later, I’m sitting in the living room doing my homework with the TV on. I hear a honk from the drive way. My parents are at work so it’s not them. I open the door and a Camaro is sitting in my drive way. The door opens and Grad steps out.

I run at him and jump into his arms.

“What the hell are you doing here,” I ask as he sets me down.

“I came with a friend who has family here. And since I was in state I’d thought I’d come see you,” he replies.

“Ok. Well, I’m just glad that you’re here for now,” I say as I walk back into the house.

“What do you mean for now? I’m moving out here this winter,” he says with a smile.

I turn back to him. I can’t believe this, he’s moving out here. That means I get to see him all the time. I rush to him and kiss him full on the lips. Hell is no longer a place called home, but heaven is a man named Gradius.