Drowning in Guilt, a Horror fanfic

Drowning in Guilt

It was a scene from a nightmare. I tried to move, but couldn’t. The seatbelt across my chest was suffocating me and my bloody hands scrabbled uselessly at the car door, trying to open it, trying to get out. Red and blue lights flashed through the shattered window, refracting off shards of glass. The sound of sirens registered somewhere in the back of my mind and I cried out desperately for help.

‘Calm down, Grace.’ I thought to myself. I closed my eyes. Counted to ten. When I opened them again what I saw nearly made my heart stop.

He couldn’t have been older than four, his translucent skin had a distinct blue tinge, but that could have just been the lights. He stared into my eyes and it felt as if he was looking right into me, accusing me.

‘It’s OK kiddo, we’ll have you out in no time, just hold on.”

I blinked. A paramedic’s face appeared, distorted in the cracked windshield.

‘What about the little boy?’

He frowned.

‘What little boy?’

‘He’s right over…’ I began, but when I looked back to where the boy had been, there was nothing. It was as if he’d never even existed.

The girl watched as her mother rifled through the refrigerator.

‘Orange juice… cheese… butter…water… what is…? -- Oh. Ew… Don’t we have any milk in this place?’

She looked hopelessly at the fridge as she finally let the door swing shut. Then she turned to the girl.

‘I’m just going out to get some milk, okay sweetie? I won’t be a moment. You’re in charge, look after your brother, okay?’

‘The mind throws up all kinds of rubbish when you’re in shock,’ said Paul, reassuring me when I told him what came into my head at the time of the accident. And yet, think it and feel it I did.

‘Paul! It wasn’t shock! I swear I saw him!’ I glared at him, willing for him to believe me. He just looked concerned.

‘Look, Gracie, I know you thought you saw him but you were in a car crash. And you were in shock. Sometimes people just see things that aren’t actually there.’

I knew I wasn’t going to make any headway with him. Paul was a great friend, but sometimes his unerring logic got on my nerves. Maybe I had just imagined the boy; it wasn’t unheard of, and no one else besides me had seen him at the scene of the crash. I sighed and looked up, about to apologise for being so difficult.

An accusatory gaze caught me instantly. Clear blue eyes. My apology stuck in the back of my throat.

‘Oi! Grace!’

A hand waved in front of my face. I looked back, but the boy had disappeared again.

‘Are you all right?’

‘Sorry, I just spaced out for a moment.’

The girl smiled at her mother’s words. She was in charge.

‘Hey, Mickey!’ she called out to her little brother, ‘Mum’s gone out for milk and guess who’s in charge?’

Her brother groaned.

‘You have to do whatever I say!’

The next time I saw him it was in a mirror. Then, out of the bus window, standing on a street corner as people walked past him without a second glace. When I tried to talk to Paul about it he asked if I’d hit my head during the accident, I didn’t mention it again after that. But that didn’t change the fact that I kept seeing the little boy all over the place, his blue eyes always the same. ‘You did it,’ they said without words, ‘it was your fault.’

‘I dare you to go swimming in the pool!’

Mickey looked uncomfortable.

‘Won’t Mummy be mad?’

‘Mummy won’t know, stupid.’

‘But… but I can’t open the gate. I’m too little.’

‘If you stand on my shoulders it won’t matter.’

‘But… but…’

‘What are you scared?’

That hit the spot.

‘I’m not scared of anything!’

The sky grew dark quickly after the sun set. Mum was working late that day and I was home alone. I’d hated being alone lately. Every moment spent by myself was like torture. If there were people around I could distract myself. I could hide from the sounds and images that bombarded my mind. Blue eyes. That piercing gaze. ‘It’s all your fault.’

I shook my head. ‘Stop it,’ I thought, ‘stop, stop, stop it.’

I stood up and went to the phone to call Paul.

‘Hey Paul, it’s Grace.’

‘Oh hey, what’s up?’

‘Do you want to come over?’

‘What, now?’

‘Um… yeah?’

‘What’s wrong? You’ve been acting weird ever since that crash.’

‘It’s… it’s nothing. Could you just come over?’

‘Sure, but you’re spilling the beans as soon as I get there. Something’s the matter and I’m fed up with you lying to me.’

‘I didn’t mean—’

‘Whatever. I’ll be there in ten minutes. Bye.’

The girl laughed as her brother crawled up to the edge of the pool, gazing wide-eyed at his reflection.

‘You know, if you’re too scared we can go back inside.’

He glared at her.

‘I’m NOT SCARED.’

Then he jumped, straight into the deep end.

I bit my lip, what was taking him so long? He said he’d be ten minutes; it had been over twenty. The silence was stifling. I felt as if I were being smothered by it. I had to get some fresh air. I went outside and sat by the pool.

‘It was all your fault.’

I spun around. Accusing eyes.

‘You. It was your fault.’

I couldn’t speak. I couldn’t scream. I couldn’t even breathe.

He took a step closer. I took as step back. I could feel the edge of the pool under my bare heels.

He smiled and it was the scariest thing I’d ever seen.

‘I dare you.’

And then I was in the water. It was freezing. I tried to kick my legs but only managed to tangle myself up in the pool cover. Everything was a dark blur of plastic and ice-cold water. I could see his eyes. ‘I dare you! Are you scared? IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!’ I tried to find the surface; I needed air like I’d never needed anything before in my life. But I couldn’t tell which way was up or down.

‘I’m sorry!’ I tried to say, ‘I’m really, really sorry!’ But my mouth filled up with water. The last thing I saw was a pair or clear blue eyes before the world faded into black.

The girl laughed and waited for Mickey to pop back up like a cork. He would get in so much trouble with her Mum. He wouldn’t be allowed to watch TV for weeks. She smiled at the thought.

But nothing happened.

‘Mickey!’

Nothing.

‘Mickey!’ she started to panic, ‘Stop it Mickey! It’s not funny!’

Nothing.

She leaned over the edge of the pool and saw the blurred, motionless body of her brother.

‘Gracie! Mickey! Where are you? You two didn’t kill each other while I was gone did you?’

The girl screamed.

Paul rang the doorbell again.

‘Oi! Grace! What on earth are you doing? It’s freaking cold out here!’

He couldn’t believe that girl. She calls him at unthinkable hours, begging him to come over, and when he gets there she won’t even open the front door.

‘Look, I don’t care what you’re doing in there I’m coming in!’

And with that he lifted up the doormat and picked up the spare key hidden there. But when he opened the door and went inside the house was empty.

Where was she?

He saw the back door standing open and went outside. The yard was small and featureless, apart from one thing. The oval shaped swimming pool. But as far as he knew no one ever used it. Certainly not him, there seemed to be a certain taboo about that pool in Grace’s house. Most of the time she and her mum pretended they didn’t even have it.

He opened the gate and walked over to the edge of the pool.

Then he froze.

‘GRACE!’

A/N: A miserable attempt at writing horror. This is a story I wrote for this year's Headmasters Essay, the word limit was 1000 but seeing as I have no restraint I went completely over. What you see here is the rsult of hours of editing and cutting, trying to get it under the word limit. In the end I just gave up.

Anyway, tell me what you think! Any and all feedback is appreciated.

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