Author's Note: So it's a little angsty, for which I apologize. But I'm not feeling to great about myself right now. I also apologize for any type-o's that might be present - my hands have been shaking for the past hour.

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Saying goodbye to someone is the hardest thing in the world.

Sometimes, you’re staring over at the person who rejected you and wondering how on earth this person who cares about you so much could have cut you so deep. You wonder if he could possibly have a heart, because tearing yours to shreds is a heartless thing to do. You think to yourself, “Why do we fall in love and fall so hard when we know that in the end we’ll be a mangled mess of bones and flesh with empty eyes and emptier souls?” Usually, that’s where I stand. But not this time.

This time, I’m staring across at you, someone I care about so much, preparing myself to rip you apart for my own selfish wants. I have a heart, I really do – I know because it’s breaking, too. And it’s shoved up in my throat, preventing the words from coming out right, And I know I’ll come out of this just as mangled as you will because you’ve done so much for me, and I must be the devil to throw away everything you have given me. But I’m doing it anyway.

I always thought that when the time came, I’d prefer to be the breaker than to be the poor, defenseless victim. But now I know I’d much rather be a martyr for love than to be the killer of a saint.

They say that you only hurt the ones you love. Well, you must love me a whole lot, because the look in your eyes hurts me more than a bullet to the chest.