This is a form ofSERIOUS satire! And it is not meant for the weak of stomach, okay? This is my suggestion to the population problem. It includes suggestions about abortion and all my thoughts about it! Read the foot-note for more information. TT

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A Modest Proposal

Every year, 1 million women under the age of 17, become pregnant in America. This is a big problem for our country. More homeless people encumbrance our streets, our taxes are raised for welfare of jobless mothers and their ten children, fewer and fewer jobs are available; and to add to all this, the United States educational system is becoming over loaded. There are at least thirty children to a class, and not to mention the excessively high prices of college these days. And still, women keep getting pregnant. Near all of these ladies just can’t afford or even handle raising a child. Or maybe they just don’t desire one.

‘There is a solution!’ You may say. ‘Abortion! It is the guilt-free, confidential and painless way to get rid of such an inconvenience.’ I know! This is a wonderful way to release yourself of the burden of your ex, or of course your beautiful figure (which, by giving birth to a child, would become a hideous disfigured thing). But have you seen the prices lately? It can be as high as five thousand dollars, and the lowest is about three hundred dollars. So this doesn’t much help those women who can’t afford children, does it? We have all tried to think of ways: insurance? ; a sponsor? ; maybe a scholarship fund?

I was conversing with a necromancer the other day, and we happened upon the subject of unborn children. He has said they glow a stunning crimson color when they are in the first quarter. Their little black eyes almost made them look like they were from another planet. They look like glowing rubies, some thing incredible to behold. We all like pretty things, shiny or expensive things. We all like to show off our brand new car or our posh clothes. All of which we have, in some way, worked for.

Well, these embryos have certainly cost money to those who wish remove them. So why not help these pitiable, underprivileged women? My proposal is this: just like a precious jewel, let us preserve these wonders, just as we preserve baby sharks: set in a little jar with preservatives taking up the space that the creature had not. The jars could be about one inch in height, and contain a little hand, foot, face, or heart, which after a few weeks of conception can be only vaguely seen. They could be made into earrings for the lady democrats, who could sport them in such a manner that the pro-life public would soon understand why they should also support the choice. The mothers are happy, and the even the medical waste is put well to use.

Prices could vary on how much of it is used and how expensive the jewelry it’s connected to is. We must take in consideration that the younger the embryo is the more see through and odd looking it might be. And of coarse it is cheaper to perform the operation in the earlier stages. If the corpse is well used, the mother could make well over what she might have spent on the operation and any other liabilities that came from.

There are men that support the operation as well. And for they, who may not wear jewelry, furniture is also an option. In another country (I will not state which, for is not of import at the moment) there have been people who keep cats inside jars and stack them up to create very interesting décor. Chairs, coffee tables, even desks could be made of these jars. Just think, you ask a lady-of-your-interest over for a diner and as soon as she enters, what does she see? A romantic love seat, made of a glowing red, with little embryo’s around as the arm rests. Think of how impressed she would be with your good taste and financial status!

All in all, I think that it could be said that this is a reasonable response to a growing problem in our society. It will not only reduce the number of hindrances on our rapidly increasing society, but it will also make happier the lives of all effected. If people could take this thought into true consideration, people might see the real intentions of the unfortunately pregnant woman and grant her, her freedom of choice.

The end.

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This was a satire essay that I wrote for Humanities. I AM Pro-life! And writeing this sickened me! But I wanted to get a point across!

ABSOLUTELY NO FLAMES! Because I could really careless about you pro-haters!

I believe in the joy of all innocent beings! I agree with Gay Marriage and I am Pro-Life! BOTH TO THE EXTREME!