Have you seen my backless number? It’s fashion at it’s best

Momma took one look at it and threatened me out the nest

Now I must say I look so sharp and cute beyond compare

And have you noticed the new dye job that I put in my hair?

These heels that go with it, well Dad says that they’re trampy

They’re boots that stop mid-thigh, not a bit whorey or scanty

And did I mention underwear kinda obstructs my dress’s flow?

When I walk up the stairs, boys see where their keys should go

Well the other girls all glare at me when I go strutting by

Truly I can’t help it if my assets catch their boyfriend’s eye

They’re all just jealous of what I got and what they cannot do

If they barfed as much as me they might be able to get in this dress too

My self esteem is quite rare, bordering on obsessed

But if you saw me, you’d know for sure that I’m the best

I’m the prettiest girl I know; don’t bother trying to beat me

You’ll lose, and guess what happens if I smile at your boyfriend sweetly?