"Yes I understand." I look over at Jayden, who's staring at the ground, biting on his lower lip.

He jots down a number and thanks the person on the other end then sits his phone on the table hard, eyes meeting mine. "They say that the last time Nathaniel was at the academy was a month ago. The dean there gave me the number of the apartment he and his roommate were staying at."

"Not like it would do much good." Jayden doesn't say anything to this, already getting to work on his sixth cigarette of the day. I've resorted to simply drinking, not so good itself but right now I need it.

It's one thing to find out that the whole time Drew was fucking watching me

It's another thing to find out you brother-who you've just developed a relationship with- has gone missing and could very well be dead

I can't say I didn't have the slightest doubt in my heart that Nathaniel wasn't telling the truth

Of course Drew wasn't going away

He's a coward just like Shane

Both seem not to go away

There's more to Drew though

He knows our secret

Shane didn't

Jayden and I have been at our wits end over this

It's been two days since Alexander broke all this to us and it still feels as if he's just told us

I want to believe that we'll get through all this shit but how can I

How can I when it seems things are becoming hopeless

It's driving me mad

How could he know our secret?

It's not like everyone knows it

Just certain people we can trust

Although I don't trust Skyler

That's the one person that knows that I don't trust

Don't know if Jay told his friends or not

But still

I would trust them more than that bastard Skyler

And that has nothing to do with the fact that Skyler is Jay's ex

Nothing at all and I'm not jealous of him

What's to be jealous of?

I'm the one with Jay, not him

My ringtone fills the room and my eyes go straight for my own phone, which is on the charger. I pick up slowly, only checking who it was then sat it back in it's place. Curtis has been blowing up both of our phones, which doesn't surprise me considering we haven't talked to him in weeks.

"Was that Malissa?" Jayden asks in a small voice.

I shake my head and simply pour another glass of vodka. "Just Curtis again."

"Do you think he could help us?"

"Jayden we can't tell him anything that's been going on; not only would it be too hard to explain, he wouldn't understand."

Jayden stares at me then nods. "Yeah that would be stupid but where do we start? Tory if you haven't noticed we don't have a lot to go by."

I think on this, downing my drink. "Well we do know that he's here and since he's watching he can't be far from both of our hotels unless the person watching is merely a puppet of his."

"Something tells me he doesn't have that many flunkies." Jayden takes a long hit off the cigarette then walks over to the window, peeking through the blinds. "Don't think he'd pay his accomplices so whoever they are they're out for revenge against us; which means they have to be people we know or have something against us."

"He's got money though, what with Nathaniel." I'm about to just pour another drink then stop. "The question we need to be asking is what does he want from us exactly; money can't be it and neither can revenge."

Jayden stares at me confused so I continue. "We can easily give him money and this seems to have nothing to do with bringing that company down; maybe in the beginning but not anymore. He could have killed us whenever he felt like it just like he had done all the others."

"He's been following us this whole time so it has to be something; and what made him exchange Alex for Nathaniel?" Jayden thinks on this then sighs irritated. "This shit's too much; we still have to deal with Tyler and then this comes up."

Tyler and Alexander are in my room, Tyler taking a nap and Alex simply choosing to reside in there. Nothing we told him could stop him from believing that he had betrayed Nathaniel so once again he was quiet. Tyler was another story; around him Jayden and I had to try our best not to show that anything was wrong. It's not wise for a five year old to have to panic.

I just want this problem to go away

Drew has no reason to be doing this to us

Shane died

End of story

If this is revenge then he shouldn't play this damn mind games and get others involved

Nathaniel may have lied but I cant just turn my back on him

Were do we start with this?

The only place I can think of is where this all started for us

Back home

Back to Los Angeles

When I tell Jay this all he does is stare at me as if my idea is crazy. "Tory if he's watching us in Florida then why go all the way to California?"

"You got a better idea Jay; don't waste time, just get your stuff from your hotel and I'll have us on a flight to L.A." I think about it then shake my head. "Better yet you stay here and I'll get your stuff."

"Tory lets be rationale."

I give him an exasperated look then get up from where I'm sitting, running a hand through my hair. "Well what other options do we have Jay, tell me?"

"Tory I'm simply saying that we shouldn't go rushing to L.A. without first knowing what Drew's intentions are. We're not the only ones that can get hurt by him; there's Tyler to worry about now, not to mention all our friends."

I take Jayden's face in my hands, locking eyes with him. "He would've done something by now Jay if that were the case and he doesn't know about Tyler. We can't just wait around expecting him to slip up. Going back to L.A. may not be the best idea but its all we got right now."

His family's there and one of them is bound to know where he is

With a little blackmail they'll give him up

The Lewis family's not practically known for loyalty

We'll find out something there

"Fine Tory we'll go if that's what you really think will help." He lets out a long sigh, drawing the sleeves of the large pajama top up.

Jayden and Alexander have had to wear a few of my clothes since we haven't left the suite. If Drew or his flunkies are still watching us then they'll no doubt wait at Jay's hotel ; one's probably still here as well. If they are watching then they'll know when we go back to L.A. Whether they follow or not is of no importance to me; the main thing to worry about is Nathaniel's condition.

Jayden walks over to where his jacket is drapped and takes out his wallet the key card then hands it to me. "My room's on the highest floor, first suite you see as soon as you get off the elevator."

I pocket the card and give him a quick peck on the lips. "I'll be right back alright, don't open the door for anyone Jay."

"I don't see why you're bothering to go and get my things. We can just leave the shit here since you seem to want to go back to L.A. suddenly."

I don't feel up to arguing about it so I simply walk out the room and make my way down to the Hotel garage where my rental car is parked. The main reason why I really want to go to Jayden's hotel is to insure that no one's there. Wouldn't be a big surprise if they searched his room.

Once I'm on my way to the hotel I call Malissa's brother again. The same receptionist answers and informs me that he's at lunch. Like I would believe that. He's most likely right there next to her, feeding her bullshit to say. I don't cause her problems though and simply thank her and hang up.

As I'm thinking about all the events that seem to have gone down lately I notice that when I try to slow down the car wont. I mash down on the breaks again but the car just goes faster.

What's wrong with this car?

I'm hitting the brakes as hard as I can

Nothing should be wrong with it

I got it yesterday at this car rental place that I always go to

Mr. Smith, the owner said it was brand new

Now I'm starting to panic. Why won't it break? Break dammit. I look at where my phone has fallen under the passenger seat and curse. Not like calling for help would help anyway but it would've been worth the trouble. At least ...

Cars weave past me, all honking their horns clearly thinking I'm just some moron that doesn't know how to drive. I grip the steering wheel tightly, trying my best not to run into anything at the speed I'm going. It's not long before the sound of a police siren is behind me. I quickly buckle my seatbelt at the sight of traffic forming in front of me.

It happens so fast. I don't even remember what I see before my car collides into all those others. I do remember the fear. A fear so great that it was almost like the time Shane came that close to killing me. I do remember going in and out of consciousness and the sounds of sirens, this time it was of an ambulance. The pain from my side, left arm, head and neck is so bad that I've gone numb.

I don't want to die

This would be just what Drew wanted

Who will protect my Jayden?

He needs me

We need each other

I hear something ...

Voices ...

It's difficult to force my eyes open but when I do everything's a blurry mess. Someone immediately comes to my side and grasps one of my hands. I try and focus on this person but my eyes just won't allow it but I recognize the feel of their hands. These hands that I know better than even my own. The hands of my beloved. He sequeezes my hand then whispers something in my ear. Clearly I'm alive or maybe I've passed on to heaven.

Hm,don't think the second one's likely

Not for me anyway

I try to keep my eyes open but they feel so heavy right now. Have to hold out. I don't want to go without seeing Jay's face. What is it that he's saying to me? I want to talk to him, tell him that we'll be alright. Why can't I?

It's not long before my eyes shut again and all I see now is darkness. The sound of what must be monitors makes it clear that I'm in a hospital. Something soft presses to my lips and I can't help but fight against my eyelids and urge them open. Once again it's awhile before the room comes into focus and when it does it's not surprising that Jayden's holding my hand. He looks down at me, a smile spreading while more tear fall down from his eyes which look like he was crying already.

"Jay."

He places another gentle tentative kiss to my lips, his tears falling on my face. "Yes I'm here Tory, I've always been here."

I struggle to sit up to Jay's surprise, noticing that there's a cast on my left hand and arm. "I ... feel ... like shit." My voice is hoarse and it seems to hurt to talk.

Jayden smoothes down my hair. "The nurse came and gave you a little Morphine."

I look where the IV is in my arm then back at Jay, stroking away some of the tears with my good hand. "Jay don't cry, don't."

He kisses my fingers and sighs a little. "I had thought I lost you again Tory."

"Well I guess that makes us even." I joke lightly leaning back onto the pillows.

"Don't joke Tory ... I'm serious." He holds tighter to my hand. "I'm too scared to ... leave your side for one second."

"This is nothing Jay compared to your coma of five months."

"Tory ... I ... almost ... lost you." Jayden breaks down into my tears and despite the pain I sit up and embrace him.

"I'm so sorry Jay." He hugs me back, careful of my injured arm and when we pull away I just want to continue hugging him.

"I must look like shit." I stare at the bandage around the elbow of my good arm. It's not long before I take a look around the room where I'm greeted with the sight of flowers of every type it seems, cards tacked to the walls, teddy bears, guitars, balloons that read 'Get Well Soon' and even custom one's that say 'Tory K.'

Jayden notices me staring at them and smiles a little, touching this vase that's full of white roses on the night table. "Yeah after the tabloids started going on about your accident fans started sending things to the hospital, some even came to see you even though they weren't allowed to."

I look at the white roses, reading the simple card in them that reads 'F.Y ~Jayden Klinder' "F.Y?"

"I wanted to put something on the card to say how much you mean ... to me." Jay gets back to holding my hand, cheeks darkening. "But you know ... our situation ... so I abbreviated something simple. Forever yours just seemed ... good."

I'm about to kiss him when the door opens and in walks what looks to be a nurse ushering Paris, Alexander and an energetic Tyler. "It seems you're awake Mr. Klinder, I'll inform the doctor."

I nod then bring my attention on Tyler. He starts clapping then throws his little arms up into the air. "Daddy woke up!"

Jayden picks the boy up and sits him on his lap, stroking his hair. "Here's your biggest fan Tory."

"Daddy Daddy Daddy." Tyler sings.

Paris giggles and I look over to her, belly not yet showing. "He's so lively and a bit too much like you Tory; Jayden filled me in on everything, pretty big shocker."

I nod slowly, Tyler now holding my hand. "It was a shock to me too; how long I been out?"

"Around two weeks."

"Damn." I then look to where Alexander is standing near the door. He's staring at the floor but does meet my eyes briefly. I simply look back to Jayden and Tyler and sigh. "Has there been any more calls from ... Drew?"

"No and no word on Nathaniel either." Jayden holds Tyler tighter so that the curious boy, that's reaching for the rail of the bed wont mess with any of the cables that are connected to the few machines I'm hooked up to. He looks at me nervously then lets out a deep breath. "Dad's here and so are those same detectives from California. They've been hanging around the hospital in hopes of you waking up to answer some of their questions. I didn't tell them anything, insisted on Holland coming so she should be here tomorrow."

I smile to this and imagine the look on Curtis' face after Jay said such a thing. He shouldn't worry so much about me but then again that's Curtis and I'd be liar if I said that I hated his concern. But then again some of the things he's done have started to screw up my life with Jay. He can't know about us, that's one thing that I know for sure.

Alexander leaves his place by the door and steps slightly closer towards me. "You can't tell the police."

"We won't." Jayden says sharply, closing his eyes, clearly irritated.

As if not believing Jayden, Alexander fixates his wide eyes to me solemnly. "Please Tory, you must make sure not to tell the police anything; Drew still has Nathaniel."

I shift in the bed, meeting Alexander's gaze. "I won't Alex; I promise you that we'll get back Nathaniel, safe and sound."

He nods slowly and comes over to my bedside. "I'm sorry about not ... telling ... you two ... sooner and ..." His eyes start to get misty and he holds onto the rail on the side of the bed. "I'm ... so ... sorry ... for ... this."

"Don't sweat it kid." I smile a little, hopping that he won't cry. I really hate tears. "A few injuries like these can't keep me down, besides I've had far worse."

"You have?"

I nod my head then look over to Jay, who's clearly trying not to cry. I sigh at the sight of the two and simply lay back. Paris puts her arm around Alexander, who seems not to really care. "It's a good thing Jay told me everything that had been going on or else I would've been lost on all of this."

"Paris it's a problem that we'll see to, I don't want you involved more than you already are, especially in your current condition."

She stares at me silently then sighs. "If that's what you want then fine, but I at least want to help out with Tyler and Alex."

Doesn't shock me that Jay told her everything

But I don't want her to be a victim of Drew

I don't want anyone to be

He's trying to kill me and if that's the case then he has to leave Jayden and anyone else alone

That doesn't mean I'll just be a victim though

Now I have to put a stop to Drew

More than ever since my life's on the line

I will protect all that are dear to me

Jay looks back at Paris, raising one of his brows. "Don't you have something to tell Tory?"

She bites her bottom lip, suddenly looking nervous. "Well ... um ... I think I may ... know who the father of my ... baby is."

When I don't say anything she goes on. "I ... got close with Brain and ... well ..."

"You and Brain?"

"Yes but that is only one ... possible ... father ... the other is an ... old friend of Dad's Doctor Remy Markin. I ... didn't want to tell you about me and Brain considering it ... was only a one night thing, not mention we were drunk and everything. It just didn't seem important to bring up."

"God Paris." I groan trying not to be angry at the whole thing with Paris. Not like I can judge but damn. I really thought it was Kyle, then again I should've known it wouldn't be him since he sees Paris like his own sister. Brain.

Guess there was more to his suspicious behavior

All about the music my ass

Pretty sure there's more to the story

More that I don't care to know

I don't say anything more on the subject of Paris and Brain and simply turn my head, keeping my mouth shut is best anyway. If I say something now then I won't stop and I'll end up lecturing. In my condition it would just be more bad than good.

Paris hooking up with Brian

How did I not know?

Dammit it's not even that that's pissing me off so much

I'm in the hospital because of fucking Drew

I'll kill that little asshole

Paris, I guess feeling awkward leaves from the room. Giving an excuse about having to go to the restroom. With her gone it's just the two gloomy ones and my ever so talkative son Tyler. He going on about all the things he's seen at the hospital in his usual child like way. I listen on vaguely then finally off fall asleep.

When I wake up its just Jay in the room now. He's asleep on the little sofa that's in the room by the window. I watch him sleeping then notice that someone else is in here. Curtis comes over to my bed once seeing that I'm woke. He pulls up a chair beside me, sighing.

"I can't believe this happened."

I look at the man who I believed to be my father for years and simply just sit up slightly. The pain from before is numb, although I'm a bit woozy from the drugs. "Damn Curtis you look like shit."

He racks a hand through his unkept hair and chuckles. "Can't say you're looking too good yourself Tory."

I yawn, glad that he's not grilling me on the whole situation. "So when can I be released from here?"

Curtis sighs, leaning back in his chair. "Tory do you realize how bad your condition was then you lost all that blood ..."

"I realize how concerned you must be Curtis but I insure you that I'm fine." I try and make this sound believable so that he'll stop worrying.

"Tory I realize that you and Jayden must hate me a lot for some of the things I've kept from you both but these things I did to protect you both but the biggest reason was I was ashamed." He folds his hands in his lap, looking me over wearily. "I was ashamed that my love for Caroline had me go the extremes. When I finally came to my senses it was too late. I never wanted to depend on Helena or do what I did with her."

"She mentioned something about you and her." I mumble looking over at Jay's sleeping face. "Let me guess, Jay is her son with you."

He sighs again and slowly nods. "After we got you Caroline felt as if she got the child that she always wanted then, what you and your brother don't know, she divorced me and tried to create the family that she wanted. A family with her lover Shane. I was so ... so ... distraught and sadly it was Helena that comforted me."

When I don't say anything he continues to go on with the story of something I much rather not hear. "When ... Caroline had found out that ... Helena was pregnant with ... my kid she wanted me back and so ... we remarried. Shane was out of the picture at the time and it was because of me taking Jayden that Helena was able to get him back with her."

"If I had known Caroline was barren I would've most likely put everything together myself a long time ago." I sit up against the pillows, feeling as if I'm lacking energy.

Curtis looks over to Jayden, rubbing his brows. "I guess with Shane gone Helena wants to get back some of what she lost." His eyes go to me then, voice lowering. "I've been receiving death threats and at first I thought it was her but then I started suspecting someone else. It could possibly be the murderer."

"Although I can't rule Helena out on such a thing. She still has it out for me and feels that because of me she lost you and Jayden. At first I was just going to simply buy her off, hoping that would get rid of her but that wont do it seems. Who knows what that psycho's thinking of doing?"

Who knows

She's a concern for me but not so much

Especially with the fact that Drew tried to kill me

It's Drew

Had to be him

But he could've killed me

Yeah, like when he broke in Jay's place

He had a gun and it's not like he's not capable of such a thing

But it just doesn't make sense that he would try and kill me now

"Tory do you know anyone who would try and ... kill you? Please tell me son if you do so that we can deal with this."

Curtis' face is lined with worry and just like the times Jayden was in the hospital and that time I was shot it's like nothing else matters in the world to him but us. Despite his own personal demons he still feels such a strong level of compassion for me and Jay.

"I don't know." I suddenly hate lying to him but this is what I have to do. It's bad enough Paris had to know but if Curtis knows then he'll no doubt take it upon himself to fix the situation.

He nods slowly, clearly believing me. "It most likely has something to do with that company, I just know it."

I close my eyes tiredly and turn slightly onto my side. "Well ... I hate to be a snoozer but sleep calls dad."

Dad

Feels kind of good to call him that again

Well even though he's not my biological father he's still the only thing close to a father that I know of

Sure he wasn't always home and he did have that affair, twice it would seem

But he still did anything he could to help me and Jay

Jay in particular

If it wasn't for that affair that he had with Helena I wouldn't have him

My lover Jayden

XxX.

The next days at the hospital seem to pass by fast. As the days pass it seems more and more things from fans and family pour in. More balloons and even more flowers. Sadly even some of my exes are sending crap. Angela actually gave me a large picture of her saying something corny about she'll always be with me. Her sister Barbra actually showed up here in a skimpy nurse's uniform.

Man did that piss Jay off

Thank god for Stanly

He had been here visiting and took her right off my hands

Well Stanly wasn't the only one from the band that came to visit

Axle, must stop calling him that

He came to talk about a few business things and even said get well

Roy did the same thing

Andrew, Kyle and Brian all came on one day

Things are not still the way they were back then with me and Kyle but we are getting there

I don't say anything to Brain on the whole Paris thing or yell at him like I want to do

Oh how it was hard not to yell at him

Today's one of those days where the nurses are getting rid of some of the old flowers that no one cares to tend to. The only thing I make sure that's tended to is the white roses that Jay got me.

I had surgery two days ago on my right leg, which was the broken one. When I'm not confined to the bed I usually just wheel my self around the hospital. But most of the time I'm in my room, strumming my guitar. I have managed to write a few more songs.

Gets my mind off the whole situation

Also calms me down

I'm working on this one when Jay comes in holding an excited Tyler. "You feeling up for visitors?"

I put aside my composition book and grin over to him. "Could never turn you down Jay, so has that little gremlin given you any trouble?"

He puts Tyler down in the bed with me and takes a seat as well. "Not at all, he may be the handful but nothing I can't handle."

Tyler grins and holds up this macaroni necklace that has been painted gold. "Look daddy, I made it."

Jayden ruffles up the boy's hair. "Yeah he had quite the time when we went to the crafts store."

Tyler slips the necklace around my neck and gives my cheek a wet sloppy kiss. I pull him beside me, not at all minding the fact that lately we seem to have gotten closer and closer. "Well I've got great news for the both of you, I'm gonna be released from here tomorrow."

"Wow Tory, but don't tell me you have to do more work."

I shake my head quickly so as not to disappoint Jay. "Oh goodness no, Axle said that I need time off anyway so I thought why not just rest for a bit."

Jayden stared at me for some time before finally saying something. "I think we should head to Boston for awhile. I mean ... we're not gonna find Drew ..."

"Well we can't wait around so that he can find us Jay, not again."

"But Tory be reasonable. A guy like him can easily evade, we don't even have a clue to where he is right now." He sighs heavily. "Look I want to get Nathaniel back just like you but we don't have a lot to go on."

"Then you can go to Boston Jay, take care of Alex and Tyler but I'm going to LA for some answers."

"Tory please." His face is one of solemn as he takes my hand in his. "Don't you think I would love to go do that too? But things are clearly dangerous I mean ... he tried to kill you Tory. I think that's a sign not to go snooping too deep until the time comes that Drew makes a slip up."

Tyler nestles into my lap as if reminding me that he's there.

Yeah

It's not just Jay and me anymore

I have not only Tyler to worry about but Alexander and Paris

But just knowing that they all need protection has me really wanting to stop Drew

Stop him before he tries to cause one of them harm

But I don't feel like arguing with Jay

I don't want to argue with Jay

I'll go to Boston then when I feel as if his guard is down I'll fly to LA and confront Skyler and try and get some answers as to Drew's whereabouts from anyone in his family

I will go as far as to track his old prison buddies

Anything

"You're right Jay." I run a hand through my messy hair and simply get to braiding it back. "We'll stay in Boston for awhile."

He smiles to this, something that's worth saying whatever he wants to hear. "Thank you Tory then all we have to focus on is getting you better."

I nod simply thinking to myself on my plans to get back to LA. Sure he'll probably never forgive me but anything's worth our safety. Can't rest until I know Drew has been takin' care of. I'm sure someone out there besides Jay and me want him dead. A guy like him has to have made some enemies.

Yeah, that sounds like a pretty good idea

To get rid of a killer you have to get another killer

And he will no doubt let his guard down

If what I'm looking for isn't in LA I'll have to simply get it somewhere else

Not like what I'm looking for will just pop out at me

And asking around would be just too stupid

I'm still confident that I'll find something

"Tory."

I look up at Jay, who clearly has been calling me more than once. Tyler giggling at my spacing out. "Um ..."

"I was asking you if you wouldn't mind Amber living with us?"

I shake my head, not really sure why his friend would want to visit at a time like this. As if sensing my thoughts he simply just tells me that she wants to spend time with him and help out. It's not like Paris can, even though she wants to. She has to be taken care of as well.

"Did she tell you that Brian went and took and paternity test?"

"No and I didn't feel up to mentioning the situation with him when he came to visit. I fear I'll just end up fighting with him." I look down at Tyler, who is watching attentively the TV, which he changed to The Fairly Odd Parents. "Perhaps they'll lay off me on my business."

"We'll get through this Tory, we always do."

"I just hope that I can believe in that Jay."

I may not be in the best condition but I shall take care of it

The idea of hiring a killer is something that's ludicrous

Only plan I got though and I know it'll just have to work

It's all I have