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It's such a beautiful kind of hurt,
this bittersweet season. Full of fear and transformations,
beauty, hope, and loss.

I found myself changing with the leaves, shifting with new winds
and falling when I couldn't stay up anymore.
Emotions built up weight in my heart, and the break was gradual –
It happened with the slightest snap.
But the fall,
the fall lasted and lasted and I'm never getting back up.

Rain came to wash all denial away, but left the gray of indecision.
Heavy clouds spelled out a quiet apprehension
and covered the unknown - the stars, the sky, and your thoughts.

But it could have been worse, and it could have hurt more.
You offered understanding, at least
Nothing needed to be justified.

I'll be fine as long as you keep your promise –
As long as this lasts
As long as you don't….

As long as you don't push me away.