Chapter 1: Rule 1: Avoid Anger Management

“WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT??” I screamed sitting bolt up right.

“Relax Em, it’s just the bell.” My best friend Kristy said.

“Bell?” I replied dumbly, “what bell?”

“The school bell stupid, we ARE at school” and she was right, here we where at school at the end of period five in maths, just so you all know I HATE maths, I mean I can do it and all it’s just that our teacher is SO pushy, anyway back to the point we’re in maths and I must have fallen asleep again.

I do this a lot in maths, and before you start criticising me you would too if you’d been through two periods of sport then recess running around after your twerp of a little brother trying to kill him with your bare hands because he keeps running around your group of friends screaming that you sleep with a teddy bear, which I so don’t do.

Then when you don’t catch him but swear that you will get revenge and that he’d better sleep with one eye open from now on, you have to go to two periods of textiles, and let me tell you that teacher is a COW. And then, at lunch when you think that you finally get a break you’re called to the principal’s office to talk about your anger issues. WHAT ANGER ISSUES?!

I don’t have anger issues, well unless you count all those times I thumped those kids but hey they deserved it. Really, they did, they were bagging my best friend just because her brother committed suicide, and that he had voices that talked to him.

Yeah, he was in the psyche ward at our local hospital for like six months before the nurses there had a mental brake down-it had nothing to do with him, something about the nurse’s kid or something- and he had to go home where three months later he cut his wrist in the bathroom, so you see why I thumped them don’t you?

“So what did the principal want?” Kristy asked as we where walking to Info. I love Info it’s just so awesome.

“Oh, well,” I paused, how could I tell her “you see-”

“Em, shut up and tell me, or do I have to scream to everyone here that you like mffff” I had put my hand over her mouth to shut her up.

“How many times do I have to tell you?” I said hotly “I DON’T like him okay? We’re just friends, get it? Ow, what the hell was that for?”

“Next time remember to let me breathe when you cover my mouth okay?” Kristy said looking peeved.

“What?” I said absentmindedly looking at the bite mark on my hand that was already turning purple.

Damn that girl can bite hard…

“Me, breathe, you know? Have to do it to stay alive, ringin’ any bells here?” she STILL looked peeved.

“Oh, I’m sorry Kris really I am.” And I was, you know how hard it is for me to feel sorry for someone having had my dad walk out on us when Andy was five weeks old? I NEVER forgave dad for that, I mean he tried to stay in contact with us when Andy was a little older but I told him to stick it, which earned me three months of being grounded. Which was so not fun, by the way.

In the end mum let him come back on one condition, which was he was to teach his children (namely us) and everyone else’s kid at the Taekwondo centre. He agreed wholeheartedly, well he was a black belt when he was young, and before he meet mum he was in the army. He got a medal for hand-to-hand combat.

“EM” Kristy’s voice broke into my thoughts “tell me what the principal wanted”

“Oh yeah, well all she really wanted was to tell me that now I have to take anger management so no harm done… oh and she said I did a good job with those boys. They need counselling now for some odd reason. I think it’s because I told them that if they ever spoke to you like that again I’d make them wish they’d never been born, then I told them how I would do that, they looked like they where about to faint when I’d finished telling them.”

Kristy let out a whoop of laughter which earned her a disapproving look from the library teacher. Jeez these people are so touchy about loud noises.

“Girls, HURRY up and get to class NOW!!”

“Yes Miss Annaway,” we said in unison “Right away ma’am.”

“Oh and Emma your first anger management class is this afternoon at four in the cafeteria”

Miss Annaway’s our principal just so you guys know. She’s normally in the library.

“Right. Thanks Miss Annaway.”

Kristy and I walked on towards the computer room for Info; we got there just as our teacher did so we avoided detention.

“You know, NOW I know why they bolt the tables and chairs down in there, it’s so people can’t throw them at other people or objects when they get peeved with someone or something.” Kristy said with a weird look on her face.

“Kristy Anders?”

“Here Ma’am” Kristy said with the weird look still on her face, there was something about the she said it that made me look over at her worriedly.

“Emma Griffin?”

I didn’t answer I was still looking at Kristy; she STILL had that look on her face. Why was she looking like that?

“EMMA GRIFFIN”

“Wha… oh I’m here ma’am” I said still looking at Kristy.

“Why didn’t you answer me the first time miss Griffin?”

“Kristy” I said still looking at my best friend and ignoring our teacher “are you alright?” Kristy didn’t answer she just sat there looking at her computer.

“Kristy” I tried again “are you alright?” Again she didn’t answer me.

“MISS GRIFFIN! ANSWER ME!!”

Again I ignored her and kept looking at Kristy, What was wrong with her??

“MISS GRIFFIN GO TO THE PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE NOW!!” she practically screamed at me so I got up and dragging Kristy behind me I walked toward the door. Kristy just followed me as if she was a puppy.

“LEAVE MISS ANDERS HERE”

I kept walking holding Kristy by the elbow, steering her so that she didn’t walk into a wall or something.

“MISS GRIFFIN GO TO THE PRINCIPALS OFFICE!!”

Well duh, she’d already told me that, which some very brave boy pointed out to her, he followed after us.

---

“Hi Emma what are you doing here?” Miss Anders asked as I sat down in the waiting room outside Miss Annaway’s office with Kristy right behind me. “Oh and little Jason Hornby what about you?”

“Well,” Jason said “We were in Info and Mrs Winger was calling the roll and Emma didn’t answer her when she first called her name so Mrs Winger called Emma’s name again and she was all ‘wha… oh I’m here ma’am’ and then Mrs Winger asked her why she didn’t answer her the first time and Emma ignored her so Mrs Winger told Emma to come up here and when Emma dragged Kristy out with her Mrs Winger told her to leave Kristy behind and when Emma kept walking Mrs Winger told her to go to the principals office and the only reason I’m up here is because I told Mrs Winger that she had already told Emma to got to the principals office and that was where she was going so, yeah.”

Did he just say that all in one breath? I think he did… what an awesome talent.

“Hi, big sis” said a quiet voice next to me, looking over I saw that it was Kristy who had said it. Well, what do you know nine years of friendship and I didn’t even know that Miss Anders was Kristy’s older sister, what kind of friend am I? Wait she HAS an older sister?

“Hi Kristy dear, how’re you feeling?”

“Not to good Rosie, Emma has anger management after school in the cafeteria. And it’s all because she hit the boys who where insulting Chris. Why would you put people with anger issues in a CAFETERIA for god’s sake? Did you know that that’s why they bolted down the tables and chairs? I didn’t, so when Miss Annaway told Emma to go to the cafeteria at four, I was shocked and Emma just shrugged it off. How do you shrug something like that off?” Kristy said raising her voice slightly as she said it so that by the end she was almost screaming.

Miss Anders just watched with a bemused look on her face.

“Well they used to have anger management classes in the Gym until some kid got hold of a baseball bat and almost beat the crap out of some other kid” I piped up. God that sounded like something I would do.

“THEY WHAT?” Kristy Screamed, which shocked me because you see Kristy is the kind of girl who loves nature and doesn’t have a single bad bone in her body, so you can see why this was hard for her to grasp the concept of some peeved kid beating the crap through some kid who had peeved him off, well almost beating the crap through him anyway.

“Wait you’re telling me that I was all worried about you and you were just SHOCKED? How could you do this to me Kristy? How could you?” I asked accusingly.

I had to fight to keep the smile from my face, Kristy looked like she was going to explode but before Kristy could answer Miss Anders said “You know what, it’s the end of the day, Emma you have to call your mother and tell her that you have anger management and that you’ll be home late, Jason just go get your bag and go home and Kristy, well Kristy maybe you should calm down a bit then you and I can go home together and maybe stop off at Wendy’s and get an ice cream ok?” Miss Anders had barely gotten all the words out when Jason bolted for the door calling ‘see ya’ over his shoulder as he went.

Kristy cheered right up at the thought of going to Wendy’s and getting her favourite ice cream, the only one who didn’t cheer up was me, and that’s because I had to ring my parents and tell them that they have to come pick up Arthur and Andrew -though we all call him Andy, seems cuter that way- from school as well because I have anger management, real fun. Oh, just so you guys know I was being sarcastic.