"Miasmic"

The grey extends for ever and a day,
Suffocating and unending,
Deep like the thoughts you express
In spacing, never capitalization.
And I am sinking, smothered,
About to tear my face from my skull;
My sides are never straight.
Unending grey skies and rain that never falls.
Everything you say sounds like a quote,
A lyric, too poetic to be a real feeling.
No, that can't be the real one.
It must writhe and squirm as the guts ooze
And thus give me cause for my envy.
I know it could never rain that much,
But for a moment, I'd be okay,
Just a moment, and I could relate
To the feeling after crying,
The entrails expelled in the
Emesis of the emetophobe.
I'll never leave my cocoon.
So I pick and pick
And scrub away the stains.
And you can see right to my core;
It ruins my hair
But not my heart.
As the tears fall, mine don't collect.
I had a taste but turned away
For the safety of my bedroom.
I will never see a rainbow.