From fate speaking

Disappointment

--

It makes me cry when I see the disappointment and disgust in her eyes. I know she’s not happy with me—with me, not something I did, not some choice I made; me. As bad as her dissatisfaction is, I feel bad for crying, too. I think about all the people who have such a hard time, and real problems to cry about, and suddenly I feel unworthy of my own tears.

I suppose these are classic struggles: having to be the person your parents raised you to be and yourself; realizing the larger picture of the world, but at the same time understanding that you’re in pain at the same time. Classic, maybe, but something everyone deals with at some time or another.

If you ever find the answer, will you let me know? For this is something I struggle with daily—how to be true to myself without breaking my mother’s heart, how to cry without being selfish.

Copyrighted © 2007 Arden Ashart