If this is what you have made me

I am happy with who I am. And if I forgive myself for tripping over sentences, please forgive yourself for not caring.

We’re always going to be five steps behind each other. I’ll move on and you won’t wait.

We’ll always go through these cycles

For all those times you never understood us.

And for all those times I cried over silly things. You weren’t there and I wasn’t needed.

So when I sat beside you we were laughing like nothing had happened

But I know other girls have loved you first

And other boys have left their marks on me

We’re both used

And I understand that.

This is how we learn to hate each other

I’ll write poems you’ll write songs. Four weeks from now we may never speak again

And you have all the words in a bucket

Never the right ones. Those have been long overdue.

But don’t worry

We both know I have a dreadful habit

Of allowing myself to love you

And you have that dreadful habit

Of throwing everything away.