"Should have known you'd bring me heartache, almost lovers always do..."
-A Fine Frenzy

Almost (L)over

I’m the sad story collector
Luring into some (un)known shade of nostalgia,
Strolling inside a chaos that was already there.

&…

You’re the chaser of disaster
Casting devastating catastrophes
Into a soul that was already broken.

together…

We’resuch tragic lovers,
Glooming out the night with nurturing words
That never stood a chance in the middle of this silence.

& all I have now is rehearsed poetry and meaningless verses
Etched into my skin,
& the memory of the lips that tasted like heartbreak.
But I thought there would be some landing point in the falling. . .

& all I remember now are the empty promises and stolen clichés
Imprinted in my brain
& the image of the irises that were sadder than a teardrop.
But I thought there would be a bit of fresh air in the drowning. . .

I need someone with a little fire in his veins
That is not intent to burn me.
I need someone who doesn’t leave me seeking for amnesia
In a battlefield of feelings.

You cast your tragic ending
Long before the start
I died close to the beginning
Of what we could have been
Once inside the finish line.

Now your sadness clings to me like a second skin
& your lies run through my bloodstream
I’m bleeding pain in the form of a novel
& I’m beating art in the shape of your beam

I’m the junkie of your cocaine words
And the whore of your Prozac fingers.
But you’re as addictive as you’re numbing
Let me sink into oblivion because it hurts me believing
there would (not) be some kind of beauty in the breakdown. . .

---

A/N: He has spread faster than cancer & has hurt more than chemo. But this is the last thing I write with him inside my mind.