I wrote this for an assignment in AP Lit a year ago. The class had very few limitations, we were only required to write in the format of a Greek Tragedy. This means that there are scenes of dialogue, followed by a chorus that describes the action. All death and violence are to occur off stage and be described only in the chorus (although dialogue surrounding it can still occur). So with that, don't take it too seriously, and enjoy.

(Tragic) Emo Runners

Scene, A State Park, A Conference Cross Country Championship. Time, A fall Tuesday afternoon.

Enter Cliff, Lars, James, and Kirk

Cliff: James, help me up from this spot on the ground, where exhausted I lay.

James: I will, for I know that running tires you as it does me.

Cliff: Why is it that we punish ourselves so?

James: What do you mean, oh wise senior? Explain so our sophomoric minds may comprehend your enigmatic question.

Cliff: In football, the players tackle and hit each other to administer pain. In soccer, the athletes leg tackle each other and are pelted by soccer balls. But in Cross Country, there are no opponents except our fellow runners, and no objects but the finish line. Our pain is self-inflicted.

James: Hey, that would be a good tee-shirt motto. But we would have to put something like ‘but we’re not emos’ at the bottom.

Cliff: Would we? What separates us from the emo self-punishers?

James: We do not cut ourselves.

Cliff: True. But why do the emos do the things they do?

Lars: It makes sense. When a person experiences pain in several areas, they can only focus on one at a time. If a person creates a source of physical pain for themselves, they can escape whatever mental or emotional pain that plagues them.

Cliff: A very good observation, Lars. And what was the reason you gave for why you ran in practice?

Lars: So I wouldn’t think about how much homework I had.

Cliff: So aren’t we like the emos, creating our own sources of pain to focus on?

James: Wow, I guess we are.

Kirk: Go Go Emo Runners!

Enter spectators and more Emo Runners as Chorus Exeunt Cliff, James, and Lars

Chorus

1.

Go Go Emo Runners! Go Go Emo Runners!

Go Go Emo Runners! You supersonic Emo Runners!

2.

Emo Runners are number one. Emo Runners don’t run for fun.

Emo Runners bury themselves/Rather than stand and face their hells.

On a cloudy afternoon/Emo Runners will race soon.

Running is why they were born/Not to face the daylight’s scorn.

Self-administered pain/Makes for fleeting gain.

Never feeling shame/In running away.

1.

Now our hero, Cliff/Is in his senior year.

Persevering through ev’ry day/As the end of the season nears.

His emotions will be stirred/More violently than ever,

By a lovely girl/Who sends his feelings in a swirl,

But he and she were not meant to be together. Ever.

It will happen never/It seems.

II. 2.

Kirk: Go Go Emo Runners!

Chorus: They are undefeatable when they’re one.

Kirk: Go Go Emo Runners!

Chorus: When apart they fall and then they are done.

Kirk: Go Go Emo Runners!

Chorus: Is our hero on a course to an untimely fate?

Enter Cliff and Lisa Exit Kirk

Cliff: Ah, such a fine looking box of Teddy Grahams. What a shame that I cannot eat any, for I have a race soon.

Lisa: Ooh, I love Teddy Grahams. Can I have some Cliff?

Cliff: Uh, sure. Take as many as you want.

Lisa: Mmm. Thank you very much.

Cliff: Anything for you, angel in spikes, bestowed upon this undeserving earth.

Lisa: What?

Cliff: Oh, Uh, you’re welcome. Just sharing the wealth.

Lisa: Okay.

Cliff: Why are you eating Teddy Grahams on this, the most sacred of all days in the season thus far? Do you not fear side aches?

Lisa: No. My race is half an hour after yours.

Cliff: Yours is such a free spirit, broken from the bondage of care and worry.

Lisa: Um, are you all right? Maybe you should have some Teddy Grahams.

Cliff: I assure you that I have never been better in my entire life, and staring at your face for one more second would satisfy me more than all the Teddy Grahams in the world.

Lisa: Um, Okay. That’s nice.

Cliff: I’m sorry to bother you, I have only one more question for you. With all your beauty and energy, why do you run?

Lisa: ‘Cause it’s fun. All my friends do it.

Cliff: Yes, my friends do, too, but is running not so grueling? I am an angst-ridden and confused teenage boy who runs to escape it all, but you surely have no such issues. What drives you into such immense pain that running incurs?

Lisa: What are you talking about? Running is easy, it doesn’t hurt.

Enter James

James: Hey, Cliff. We gotta go on our warmup run.

Cliff: Oh. Then I must depart, lovely Lisa. May my Teddy Grahams bring you good fortune. Exeunt Cliff and James

Lisa: What a weird kid. But then, no boy has ever been so kind to me before. Exit Lisa Enter Cliff

Chorus

1.

Cliff: She is such a beautiful girl/And she is a runner.

I abuse myself on my runs/But hers seem more funner.

She is such a beautiful girl/She is one I could love.

But she’s not an emo like me/I’m a crow, she’s a dove.

I run to escape my problems/She runs for enjoyment.

But she’s such a beautiful girl/That is my annoyance.

If she were an Emo Runner/I could share all her pain.

But she has no pain to offer/Yet, I love her the same.

2.

Why can’t she be emo?/Why can’t she be emo like me?

Why can’t she be emo?/Why can it not be? Exit Cliff

Chorus: Why can’t she be emo?/Why must she be free like a bird?

Why can’t she be emo?/Why can’t he be hers?

1.

Before the race commences/Our hero will embark

On the hardest journey of his life/Raging on in his own heart.

He is not only an emo/But an emo and a runner.

So he’ll break emo tradition/And do something about his problems.

So he will work his courage up/And do a thing may would disparage.

He will ask that lovely, cute, fast, beautiful, sleek, charming, clever, angelic, heart-melting, fair, molded by the gods themselves, with more natural splendor than a forest elf, enchanting, tempting, perfect, smart, kind, and happy girl

Lisa for her hand in marriage.

II. 2.

Another obstacle facing Cliff/That the gods gave

Is in the form of another boy/The one that they call Dave.

He’s not a Titan like Cliff or Lisa

He’s a Pioneer/Wearing the green colors

The Harvester of Sorrow draws near.