A/N: This was a school project. Ii'm putting it here for fun.

After The Storm
Precious

‘Daddy?’

‘Yes honey?’

‘Matty hasn’t been home for a while.’

‘I know.’

‘Where does he go?’

‘No idea, honey.’

‘I miss him.’

‘I know you do.’

‘Do you miss him too?’

‘Sure, honey.’

‘Hey gorgeous!’

I nearly spill Mr. Bubbles’ tea in fright! I squeal as I turn around. Matty comes over to me, hiding something white behind his back. I see a glimpse of it.

‘Can I join in?’ he asks with this big grin on his face. He pushes aside Mrs. Applecake and plonks himself down on her little pink seat. He looks really funny because the seat is so small and he’s so big.

‘No, Matty! You’re going to ruin my tea party!’ I complain, but he can tell I wasn’t being serious. I know there is this big, goofy smile on my face. I can’t stay mad at Matty. Besides, I haven’t seen him in forever.

‘Tea party? And how come I wasn’t invited?’ he asks me with a pretend serious face that makes me hug my sides in laughter.

‘Well, I left the invitation on your bed incase you came home,’ I scold him, just like mummy does whenever he’s not come for days and doesn’t call, or breaks promises.

I spot the white thing behind him again that he’s trying to keep hidden, but he knows I see it.

‘Is it a present?’ I ask.

‘Maybe.’

‘Is it for me?’

‘Maybe.’

‘C’mon Matty. Is it a toy?’

‘Maybe.’

I squint my eyes shut in frustration. Matty is still smiling at me.

‘You’re so mean,’ I pout. I turn away, continuing with my tea party and pretending he isn’t there.

‘Aw, don’t give me the silent treatment,’ he drawls – just like a baby.

I ignore him.

‘Alright, fine.’ I can see his smile double in size from the corner of my eye. ‘You were right.’

‘Really?’

‘Yep,’ he chuckles, holding up his hands to show me what he’s hiding. The toy is white with really long ears, about the size of its body, and it has cute little brown buttons for eyes. It doesn’t have a mouth, but its nose is a little stitched cross that makes it look like a very quiet, serious little bunny.

‘Bunny!’ I squeal happily, holding my hands out to it as if the bunny is going to hop into my arms.

Matty laughs again, ‘here,’ and hands me the little white bunny. I rub my nose into its soft white fur, giggling as it tickles my cheek.

‘Is it for me?’ I ask as I jump up from my little pink chair, accidentally knocking down my chair and spilling some of the pretend tea on the table. Mummy’ll get mad at me, but I don’t care.

‘Of course!’ He tilts his head to the side, ‘who else?’ He sounds confused, as if he doesn’t understand who’d want the bunny other than me.

‘You?’ I ask.

‘Me?’

‘Yep!’ I beam.

Matty laughs. ‘I’m too old for toys, kiddo. Just you.’ He ruffles my hair – something I really hate – and laughs as I try to hit him with the bunny. I get him, but I don’t think the bunny did much hurting, which makes me a little more upset. No fair.

‘You’re mean,’ I tell him, trying to flatten my hair down again so that it looks pretty.

‘Well, if you don’t want it,’ he says with a smirk, ‘I can give it to Jamie. He might want it.’

That makes me madder. ‘You’re really, really, really mean!’ I accuse him, crossing my arms and fixing him a scowl, just like mummy does.

‘That doesn’t work on me!’ he grins. ‘If it doesn’t work when mummy does it, it’s not going to work when you do it!’

I poke my tongue out at him to show him I don’t care. Instead I clutch the bunny to my chest and hug its brain out before telling the bunny that I love it more than I love Matty. I decide to make the bunny a boy as a passing thought, but I don’t have a name for it yet.

I glare up at Matty to see if he is pouting because I told the bunny I love it more than I love him – which isn’t true, but he doesn’t know that – only he isn’t pouting or smiling or anything like that. His smile is upside down and his eyes are giving me a weird look. It hurts to look at it.

‘Joking!’ I tell him quickly, giggling like I don’t notice that he’s looking hurt. ‘Of course I love you more!’

His frown goes away and his new smile is glowing. I feel happy suddenly – I don’t know the word for it – but it makes my pretend smile real again.

‘You better,’ he warns me jokingly, but I take it like a serious warning. I don’t like the look he gave me and I don’t want to see it again.

‘So,’ he says, ‘like the bunny?’

‘I love it! Thank you!’ I hug him quickly and pull away, but he doesn’t let me go that easily. He sweeps his arm under my legs and around my back and pulls me up in the air. I squeal, feeling a bit scared, but it goes away when Matty kisses my cheek.

‘No worries, gorgeous,’ he whispers and clutches me to his chest in a raw but loving hug. I beam.

‘Honey, lunch time!’

I leap out of Matty’s arms and race out of the door at the sound of mummy’s voice. I’m so hungry!

Before I slip out completely I look at him standing there, staring at me with a secret smile on his face, and I beam. ‘I love you, Matty!’ I call to him and disappear down the corridor.

He might have said he loves me too, but I’m too far away to tell.

‘Mummy?’

‘Yes, honey?’

‘Why is Matty never home?’

‘…’

‘Mummy?’

‘Yes, darling?’

‘Why don’t you love Matty?’

‘What makes you think I don’t love Matthew? Of course I do.’

‘Promise?’

‘I promise.’

‘Okay.’

I giggle to myself. The bunny’s soft fur is tickling my skin! I giggle again. Mummy walks into my room, but I don’t stop giggling.

‘Honey, put down the toy. It’s time to get dressed,’ she says. She sounds weird again.

‘Okay,’ I say. I put down my new toy bunny next to my bed. It’s been over a

week, I think, and I still haven’t named it yet. I should probably name it.

‘Mummy?’ I ask as she slips my pajama top off my head. I shiver. The room is so cold!

‘Yes, honey?’ Mummy rubs my back and I start to feel better. She stands up straight and I watch her as she takes out some clothes from my closet.

‘Why’d Matty go?’ I ask. Mummy stops suddenly. I can see her back do this funny thing where it goes all tight and weird. There’s probably a word for it. But I don’t know it yet.

‘He’s... I don’t know, honey.’ She goes back to picking out clothes. I can see they’re all black. Yuk! Not black!

‘Mummy! I don’t like black!’ I complain quickly. Mummy’s wearing black too, I notice.

‘Doesn’t matter,’ she says, ‘you have to wear black.’

‘Why?’

‘You just do.’

‘Why?’

‘I don’t know. You just do,’ she says again. She comes back to my bed with a long black dress and black shoes.

‘Aw, but mummy! I hate black! Can’t I wear pink?’

‘No, honey,’ she repeats as if she’s bored with me talking. That’s not fair! I haven’t even started yet!

‘And I don’t like those shoes! They’re too big!’ I can tell mummy’s getting annoyed with my complaining, but I really didn’t want to wear black. I don’t want to be the same as her! That’s just not cool.

‘But-’

‘No,’ mummy cuts in, and this time she’s angry. I decide to stop talking and just wear the black dress and shoes. I don’t want mummy to be angry and weird with me. She’s already weird enough as it is. But I won’t tell mummy that. She might get even madder at me.

‘Mummy?’ I ask.

‘Yes, honey?’

‘Where’d Matty go?’ Mummy sighs and her whole body slumps and falls into itself as if she’s about to cry. It’s weird to watch.

‘He...he went to a special place, okay honey?’ Her voice is soft and sad. I’m really confused, but I nod to look smarter, just to pretend I understand. Maybe if I keep asking questions I’ll understand. And then maybe if I understand mummy will tell me where Matty is.

I know she knows where he is.

I smile. ‘Where’d he go? Can I go there too?’ I give my big, puppy-dog eyes, but when I stare into hers - all broken and gloomy - this weird feeling explodes inside my tummy like a thousand butterflies.

What’s wrong with me lately? I’ve been so weird.

Everyone has.

Mummy tries to smile, but I don’t think it’s working. ‘Matthew went to a special place, honey,’ she repeats. She kneels down in front of me so that she’s my height, and she takes me by the shoulders, as if she thinks I’m going to run away. But why would I run away? ‘You can’t go there. Only Matthew can go, okay?’

‘Okay!’ I look down at myself. I hadn’t even remembered mummy dressing me. I guess I was just thinking too hard. Maybe that’s why everything’s been so weird. Everyone is just thinking too hard. That’s got to be it.

Now I feel really smart!

I beam.

‘No more questions now honey.’ Mummy sounds tired, so I guess I probably should let her be. But I still have two more questions.

‘Wait, I have two more questions,’ I tell her. She sighs, but I know I got her. I laugh.

‘Okay, go,’ she says tiredly.

‘When will Matty be back? Will I see him again?’ I ask first. It was two questions, but I don’t think mummy noticed.

‘You’ll see Matthew one day, honey.’ I think she’s lying, but I say nothing.

‘Okay.’ I hold up two fingers so she knows this is the last question. ‘Can I take Matty with me to wherever we’re going?’

‘What?’ she looks surprised and confused.

‘My new toy bunny!’ I explain quickly. ‘I decided to call him Matty.’

‘Oh, sure, of course you can.’

‘Yay! Do you think Matty would like that? I haven’t asked him yet.’

This time mummy’s smile is broken, and it makes my chest hurt. ‘I’m sure he’d love it, honey.’ She takes a small clip from her pocket and puts it in my hair so that it looks pretty.

It’s a pink one.

I giggle. I’m so happy! When I see Matty again I’m going to tell him the good news!

Mummy leads me out of my room.

My chest stops hurting.

‘Matty?’

‘Wassup?’

‘How come you and mummy and daddy don’t talk anymore?’

‘…I dunno. Maybe we’ve just fallen apart or somethin’.’

‘But why?’

‘They just don’t approve of me. At least that’s what I reckon.’

‘What does that mean?’

‘...They just… I’m different, okay?’

‘They don’t like different?’

‘Guess not.’

‘Oh, okay. Well, I like different.’

‘Me too.’

Everything rolls around slowly outside. Trees crawl across the window - houses too. The car picks up speed but I don’t really notice. Everything still looks like it’s going slow motion to me. We drive nearby a small, white house with wilting flowers and an old, broken green sofa on the veranda.

A girl is sitting there in a black dress. Her hair is dark and her skin is white. I’ve seen her before but I don’t know her name. I used to see her with Matty a lot, but not anymore. She looks sad, upset. She might even be crying.

We pass too quickly to tell.

I frown slightly to myself as we pass the bakery. Sometimes we used to come here on Sundays and have milkshakes and strawberry tarts. I think Matty only ever spent one Sunday with me, mummy and daddy in the bakery. He was usually out with that girl back at that house or out with his friends.

I don’t like his friends.

I spot one leaning against the wall of the library, looking mean and cold – smoking. His clothes are dark and scary, and when his eyes look at mine I can see sadness and pain.

I look away.

No matter what I do, where I look, I can’t stop thinking about Matty. Everything is going topsy-turvy in my head. I can still see all these everyday things, but they’re all wrong in ways I can’t explain. I see Matty’s hurt eyes flash in front of my eyes - and I shake my head to get rid of them. I see that girl, upset, sad and maybe even crying. I see Matty’s friend - in pain, sadness swallowing up his normally scary eyes with a hungry gulp.

I try to shake my head again but they don’t leave. I wriggle around to get free but they’re still looking at me, making my eyes sting with something I don’t understand. I want to cry.

‘Darling, wake up.’ It’s daddy’s voice. I relax and slowly open my eyes, seeing daddy’s eyes looking at me in the mirror near his head and mummy turning in her chair to watch me worriedly.

‘It’s okay, honey, it was just a dream,’ mummy smiles and reaches her hand out to touch my knee. I pull away and look out the window. Mummy goes back to looking out the front.

I wish Matty is here with me now. I want him home. I want him here to tell me why everything seems so out of place. I need him to tell me it’s going to be okay.

I wish he said goodbye first. It would be the polite thing to do. But then again, Matty was never polite. He was always rude and always late.

Daddy probably drove him away that day they were fighting and yelling and screaming and swearing. I was in my room, but I could hear everything. They were so angry.

Daddy looks at me again in the mirror and smiles the weird smile that everyone seems to have. Maybe I have it too, I don’t know. He must just miss Matty. That must be it. Matty probably didn’t say goodbye to daddy before he went to the special place, and daddy must be feeling guilty about the fight.

Who knows?

The fights over. Matty can come home now. The fight…

‘Mummy?’ I ask quietly. She doesn’t say anything so I repeat it louder. ‘Mummy?’

‘Yes, honey?’

‘What are drugs?’ Mummy turns to frowns at me. The whole car goes silent for a long time. I notice something inside all of the quietness. Mummy looks older somehow. She looks tired and worn out and upset. She didn’t look that old last week.

Just more weird things I seem to notice.

‘W-what, honey?’ mummy stutters, looking surprised. ‘Where’d you hear that word?’ I don’t miss the edge in her voice.

I whisper, ‘Daddy said it the other day when he and Matty were fighting.’

I know instantly that what I said wasn’t the right thing to bring up. I just know.

Everything is silent.

‘Drugs are bad things that hurt people,’ she says finally, her eyes meeting mine unexpectedly. ‘And you must never go near it.’ She was serious.

All I wanted to do was nod and never bring it up again, but a thought pops up in my head and I couldn’t stop it from coming out. ‘Did Matty go near it?’ I ask. ‘Is that why you got angry?’

‘Honey, that’s enough.’ She’s upset now.

‘Is it?’

‘That’s enough,’ daddy says darkly, but for some reason that doesn’t stop me.

‘Did it hurt him?’

‘Honey-’

‘Did it?’ I tried again.

‘Honey, that’s enough,’ daddy bellows angrily. The whole car goes silent.

But I got my answer.

‘I don’t want to hear anymore about drugs,’ he says in a quieter voice. He sounds tired, like he’s given up. ‘Do you understand?’

I nod.

Without me realizing, we stop at this strange place I’ve never seen before. It’s all green, with a few trees here and there, and there are lots of big stones sticking out of the ground. That seemed a little weird to me but no one else thinks it’s weird so I don’t say anything.

I notice something else though that takes my attention away from the stones with the weird markings and to the people on the top of the hill.

They were all dressed in black.

It was like a Halloween party but during the day and with less kids and no candy.

I see Jamie Sullivan with his mummy, talking loudly about how hungry he is. At least Jamie isn’t acting weird!

I look up at mummy, about to ask if I can go and play with Jamie, but her eyes are red and sad and I think she’s crying.

‘Mummy?’ I ask. ‘What’s wrong?’

She looks down at me, surprised. ‘Nothing honey.’ I don’t believe her.

‘Then why are you crying?’

‘I just got something in my eye, honey.’

‘Oh,’ I say quietly. ‘Okay.’

She smiles. It makes me want to hug her and kiss her and cry into her shoulder. But I don’t.

‘Can I go play with Jamie?’

She looks up to Jamie’s mummy who starts walking towards my mummy. Neither of them is smiling. ‘I think that would be best,’ she whispers finally and pushes my back towards Jamie. I start forward, hear Jamie’s mummy call her ‘Jane’ and then I can’t hear anything anymore and Jamie is galloping to me, grinning.

I couldn’t help but grin back. At least Jamie will always be my best friend. He’ll never leave me.

We run off together.

‘Matty?’

‘Yep?’

‘Can I ask you something?’

‘No.’

‘…Oh…’

‘I was kidding!’

‘Oh. Okay.’

‘Geez, lighten up, kiddo. You’re too young to be so down.’

‘Um, okay…’

‘Never mind. Wassup?’

‘Do boys have coodies?’

‘Ha, no way!’

‘So the girls aren’t afraid of you?’

‘No way.’

‘Oh.’

‘Between you and me, they can’t keep their hands off of me.’

‘What d’you mean?’

‘I’ll tell you when you’re older. What’s with the questions anyway?’

‘Jamie said he likes me - and he promised he didn’t have coodies. But I had to be sure.’

‘Heh, you’re jokin’!’

‘No.’

‘Awesome. Do you like him?’

‘…Yes.’

‘Ha!’

‘Matty, don’t laugh!’

‘Can’t help it. It’s cute. I always knew it was gonna be you and Jamie, kiddo. I always knew.’

I can’t sleep.

My curtains are open and my window is showing me the ugly storm outside that seems to be screaming and yelling and swearing at me - then it starts crying. The drops are big and hard and hurt somewhere inside of me. The rain reminds me of something I buried on the inside that I didn’t want to come out. The thunder still screams at me and I feel like it’s shouting bad words, as if I did something wrong to it.

I sniffle a little to myself and try to think of something else. I don’t want to think of Matty – that also hurts me inside. So I think of the weird day I had today at the garden with Jamie.

He thought the stones were weird too, like me – said that the weird writing on the stones are names or something, but we can’t read very well.

I remember everyone crying though. Mummy cried – she couldn’t pretend that she got something in her eye anymore. It gushed out of her eyes, and she hiccupped and sniffled and sobbed. It hurt to look at – a lot.

Dad was quiet – dead quiet. It scared me sometimes, especially when he looked at the big box covered in flowers and he would shake his head and close his eyes and not open them again for a long time.

Everyone cried so much that it made me cry – and that made me angry. Why is everyone so sad? Do they miss Matty? Is that why? I miss Matty too, but I’m not crying!

What babies.

Matty will be back. There’s no need to cry.

I was confused, and so was Jamie.

I spent all day with Jamie, even when everyone else came over to my house. I didn’t talk to Oliver much. He stayed with his brother Benny and they talked and looked a little sad. They even told me sorry, and when I asked why they just looked at me with so much sadness that I looked away and just said not to worry about it.

Everything hurt so much.

I clutch at my blanket and look out at the angry black clouds. It suddenly reminds me of the fight daddy and Matty had. Their fight was like a storm in lots of ways. There was rain and thunder and big, loud grumbling that nearly shook the whole place.

I try to stuff the memory back inside my head, scrunching up my face because it’s so hard to do – and I smile when it’s gone.

But my smile disappears quickly.

I stare down at Matty the bunny rabbit sitting beside me, half under the covers. I take it out carefully, making sure to take special care of it so that it lasts forever, and quickly hug it tight to me. I’m not sure why I’m acting like this. I feel scared. Something’s bubbling up inside of me. I feel like crying.

I scream.

‘Mummy!’ I scream again, and it breaks inside my throat halfway – and so does the next one.

‘Daddy!’ I yell again. Tears start crawling down my face, and then more start taking over them until it feels like a stream is pouring out of my eyes. My heart burns and explodes inside of me - thumping like crazy until I can hardly breathe in between the tears and the thunder inside my ears.

I scream again.

Suddenly my door rips open and both my mummy and daddy are there, panicking. I’m still yelling and screaming in bed.

‘Why did you go Matty?!’ I start again, grabbing at my heart, both inside and outside. ‘You made everyone cry! And now you’re making me cry! Why?!’ The screaming feels more like it’s inside my head, but I know it’s outside too - and mummy and daddy can hear it.

Daddy, I think, grabs at my hands to pull me out of bed and into his arms, but I kick and push him until he lets me go and I fall back on the bed with a sob. Mummy is calling to me and telling me to wake up – but I am awake. I know what’s happening – why.

And it hurts so much.

‘Please, calm down!’ Daddy has his hands on my shoulders again, trying to shake me awake. I try to crack my eyes open to see him, to yell at him, to tell me to leave me the hell alone, but I can’t. Everything blurs and spins – I feel dizzy. Weird things from yesterday and today blow up in my head and everything goes clear inside.

I understand.

‘Honey, what’s wrong?’ Mummy comes to my side and grabs my hands. I push her away and try to get up, but daddy is there and won’t let me.

‘Matty’s not coming back, is he?’ I sob. I feel like my insides have exploded and now I’m a shell being washed out into the ocean. I feel arms wrap around me and then I can smell mummy’s perfume and I grab her top and cry. Daddy’s chest presses against my back and his arms come around mummy and me.

‘He’s not coming back,’ I repeat in a whisper, and the tears come back.

‘No, my love,’ mummy says into my hair, squeezing me tighter. I feel her tears on my head. ‘Matty’s not coming back.’

That’s the first time I ever heard mummy call him Matty.

I cry harder.

I miss Matty.

‘Hey Matty, it’s me. It’s been a while, sorry. Work has been hell on earth. I brought you fresh flowers whenever I get the opportunity, if you haven’t noticed. I brought you three roses this time. They’re beautiful.

‘A white one, to remind me of your white face, of your white walls, your white sneakers that you refused to part with, and that small white rabbit you gave me the week before you left me. White for innocence, for serenity, for angels, for that single white puff of cloud on an otherwise endless blue sky…

‘A red one, to remind me of your soul: full of passion and zeal, full of hope, a yearning to be free, to find release. A hunger for rebellion. You had such a rebellious soul. So restless, so disquieting.

‘And a black rose. Black like your clothing, black like your make up, black like your dyed hair, black like those nights when you sat me on your lap on your bed when I couldn’t sleep, and you told me fairytales about princesses, witches and kisses that could break any magical curse.

‘Black… black like your eyes. Black like hate, like death, like pain, like your coffin, like the clothes mum forced me to wear when all I wanted to wear was pink.

‘White, Red and Black: to symbolize your life.

‘…

‘Matty, I miss you. I miss you so much Matty. It’s hard without you.

‘…

‘I had a dream about you last night, Matty. One of many over the years.

‘I was sitting on one of my little pink chairs, surrounded by my dolly, Mr. Bubbles, Mrs. Applecake and the others – you remember them, don’t you? You sat on a normal sized chair you took from your room because I was scared you’d break my chairs if you sat on them.

‘The tea party was a success. All my toys loved you. They said you had beautiful manners - and I had to agree. There was more, too, but that’s all I can remember right now, sorry.’

‘…

‘Why did you never argue whenever I asked you to play with me and my dolls, Matty? You could have been spending your time with your friends, or your girlfriend, or anyone else but your little sister. So why Matty?

‘You were the best brother anyone could have asked for. I just wish you could have said goodbye first. That would have made everything better. But that’s all in the past now. This is now.

‘…

‘I’m getting married. Isn’t that great?

‘And yes, you were right. You loved to tease me about Jamie, said best friends always fell for each other.

‘You were right.

‘I love him, Matty. And I know you would approve.

‘…’

‘Hey honey, it’s time to go! We’re going to be late for my sister’s birthday!’

‘I’m coming Jamie!

‘…Sorry, Matty. I have to go. Jamie’s sister is turning 17. Same age as you. Cool, huh?

‘I promise to visit more ofteny. I’ll bring more flowers.

‘I love you, Matty.

‘Miss you.’

A/N: Thanks for reading. Please review.