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The Heart of Everything

Chapter Five

The book lay open on Coop’s lap as he sat in the middle of the quad. He looked up from the textbook at all the students around him, some rushing to their next class, some tossing a Frisbee around, some of them working on their homework…like Coop.

Blake had been yelling at him, telling him that he needed to get out of his dorm, to stop brooding over what had happened. Coop had tried to push Blake, Andie, and the others away. He didn’t want their comfort. They tried to convince him that it was an accident and that he wasn’t responsible for it. Still, he wouldn’t listen to them.

Which was why he was out here doing his work. They would think that he was still locking himself in his room and would look for him there. The middle of the quad was the last place they would look.

He sighed and bent back down over his book, trying to force himself to concentrate on his homework. It was taking more effort than ever before; his mind would wander back to a time when things were easier, when all of his friends were still around. The textbooks, which had once held his interest and made him enjoy what he did now just seemed a chore, something to do just to try and pass the time.

After a few minutes he gave up and looked around the quad once more. As he did so he watched a girl hurry across the quad, clutching her books to her chest. Her dark hair was pulled up into a bun and her features were contorted with a worried expression. There were a few catcalls and whistles as she moved past the jocks but she ignored them and continued walking.

Coop’s brown hazel eyes followed her as she continued to move. He ran through his brain, trying to remember if he had seen her before but he came up with nothing. She was either new or he just hadn’t had the chance to meet her yet.

Then Coop shook his head. He really didn’t need to know everyone on campus. “Hey Coop,” said a voice from behind him.

Coop turned to see Blake. “What are you doing here?”

“Well, from this angle, it would appear that I’m watching you stare at a girl.”

He shook his head. “You would be wrong. I was just trying to think if I knew her or not, and I guess I don’t so it doesn’t really matter.”

“So you’re going to sit here and honestly tell me that you weren’t the slightest bit interested in catching up with her and starting a conversation?”

Coop closed his textbook and shoved it back into his bag before slinging it over his shoulder. “Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying. Besides, she’s not my type.”

“How would you know that if you haven’t even said one word to her?”

“I just know Blake.”

“Uh-huh. I highly doubt that Cupid. You know as well as I do that you are amazing at matching other couples but you’re completely clueless when it comes to finding your own partner. Honestly Coop, you have not had a single girlfriend just because you say that you’ve never connected with someone. Maybe you can’t connect because you won’t even give anyone a chance. Who knows, you could find your perfect match right here and now. Just…go talk to her.”

Coop shook his head and stood up. “I should go. I have a lot of work to catch up on.”

Blake grabbed Coop’s bag and jerked it out of his friend’s grasp. “And you can do your work after you’ve gone and talked to her.”

“Blake, no! I can’t do that. I have too much homework that I’ve neglected lately. I need to do that.”

He simply shook his head. “No, not until you go talk to her, get her name, see if you have any common interests. Hell, maybe you should even get her phone number and set up a date or something.”

“I’m not doing it.”

“Do it or I’ll call home.”

Coop looked at Blake. “You wouldn’t.”

“Oh but I would, and I will if you don’t go talk to her.”

“Why does this mean so much to you? Honestly, why do you care if I go talk to one girl?”

“Because you are not the Coop we have all come to know and love. You’ve changed lately buddy, and we don’t like it. Where are all the smiles, the laughter? Seriously, things are not the same without you.”

“If you haven’t noticed it yet, a lot of things have changed around here. Maybe you should just get used to it,” Coop snapped.

“Come on man, it is not your fault. How many times do we have to say this to you? There was no way that you could have known about that drunk driver. It isn’t something you can plan around. Tanya and Brian spent their last moments together and I bet they were happy.” He paused and shook his head. “They would not like to see you this way, beating yourself up for something you couldn’t have altered. It’s done, it’s over with. We all wish we could change what happened but we can’t. Just accept it, please, and move on with your life.”

“I’m sorry.” Coop reached out and grabbed the strap of his bag, trying to pull it to him. For a moment Blake resisted, keeping a firm hold on the bag, but then he let it go. “What kind of life can I live knowing that I contributed in some way to the death of a couple friends?”

“It’s not your fault, Coop!” Blake cried, exasperated.

“How can you say that?”

“Because it’s the truth!”

“What if it’s not? If I hadn’t matched them up then they wouldn’t have gone out that night. They would still be here now.”

“You don’t know that. I know your heart wants to tell you that you could have done something to prevent it, but listen to your head. You know you couldn’t have done anything to stop that other driver. It isn’t your fault Coop, and the sooner you accept that the better.” Blake paused for a moment. “Now, can you please at least go and talk to that girl? I swear I will call home if you don’t. I know your parents are just looking for an excuse to come here and visit.”

“No! Blake, please don’t call them.”

He smirked. “Then go talk to the girl and I won’t call.”

Looking at Blake, Coop sighed, knowing it was useless to try to keep arguing. Blake was even more obstinate than Coop and didn’t stop until he got his way. “Fine…I’ll go talk to her.”

He turned and walked away from Blake, heading in the direction the girl had walked. Why had he let Blake talk him into doing this? It really wasn’t going to help anything. Besides, she probably already had a boyfriend and she would have no interest in Coop anyway. Once again he sighed. This was absolutely ridiculous.

He grumbled. When this was over he would have to go back and yell at Blake for this extremely stupid idea. Looking around he spotted her and sped up, just wanting to get it all over with. She turned the corner and halted. Coop stopped just before he would have run into her.

She spun around and looked at him. “Why do you people insist on following me?” she asked.

“I…I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to really follow you or anything. It’s just, a friend of mine wanted me to come and talk to you, see if we had anything in common or anything.” He paused. “I guess I’ll just go now.”

She reached out and grabbed his arm. “Wait…It’s okay. I just thought you were one of those jocks. They’re always following me and yelling out these rude comments. I’m sick and tired of it.”

Coop just looked at her, taking in her deep blue-violet eyes. Then he held out his hand. “My name is Coop, and you are?”

She smiled and took his hand. “Faye.”

Pulling her hand up he kissed it. “Well it is a pleasure to meet you Faye.”

“You too, Coop.” She pulled her hand away and looked at him. “Well, I should probably get going. I have a lot of homework to do and I can’t seem to get it done lately. My mind’s just been distracted on way too many other things and…” She paused. “I’m rambling. Sorry, it’s a nasty little habit.”

“Oh, it’s fine. I have plenty of homework to work on as well. Maybe we’ll run into each other some other time.”

She nodded. “Until next time then?” Then, without waiting for an answer she turned and walked away, leaving Coop just standing there and watching her. After a few minutes he turned and headed for his dorm, only to find Blake waiting there for him. Coop rolled his eyes and ran past Blake, slamming his door shut. He did not want to talk to his friend, not right now.

Locking his bedroom door he dropped his bag to the ground and collapsed on his bed, staring up at the ceiling and listening to the war within him, the one between his heart and the loss of Brian and Tanya, and his head, which was telling him to move on and try something new.