Her Voice

Written By: Lady Alera Van Hexis

She stares at me

Her eyes attempting to focus

Her mouth a frown

The corners slightly turned downward

She is trying hard

Attempting to focus

It has been forever

A long battle

That her tiny fragile heart

Can barley stand

Her graceful hands reach out

They clutch at my hair and at my face

I can feel that she wants more

More than this lonely silence

I want more for her too

She has never said a word

Only watched and waited

I can feel them coming

Her mouth begins to form letters

No sound

Nothing

I can see the struggle in her face

Now her mouth is even more a frown

She looks down at the floor

This has happened many times

Countless times

Each time more painful than the next

She thinks she has let me down

She can see the look on my face

The expectant greedy look that begs her

The look that my face gives away

I want her to speak

She was born

Nothing wrong

A healthy beautiful baby girl

My joy

My light

My life

Months later

She didn’t speak

She barely walked

She sat and watched

She was aware

She was perfect and nothing was wrong

My healthy beautiful

Silent

Baby girl

My joy

Soon she went to school

The children and the teachers asked

Has she ever spoken?

No was my only reply

But one day yes

If we could wait

The children were amazed at first

Shocked at this creature

This silent girl who never spoke

An oddity that seemed unique

And new and interesting

Until her silence grew tiring

And her presence boring

So they threw her away

Excluded and abandoned her

She cried

My beautiful baby girl cried

They were cruel

And the silent sobs that shook her body

Made me weep myself

I took her

Away from that

The teachers and their questions

The children and their cruelty

And I brought her home

She has seen everyone

Every development specialist

Every therapist

Every doctor

Many people

Countless people

No answers

So now we live each day

And we wait

Because we know her words are coming

They are right behind her eyes

I know it

She is everything

She feels and breathes and knows and sees

The world is hers and she has no one

To reject her

She is the love of my life

I close my eyes and open them

Her hands cover her own eyes

She peaks out and smiles

The giggle is silent

But the joy in her face is there

So I see her frown once more

And she attempts to force the words

But they are not coming

She is not ready

So we lay down for our nap

And the final thing I see

Is the smiling face of my angel

My healthy beautiful baby girl

Perfect

My joy

My life

My voice

Hers will come