15/ death- waiting over dying

Fifteen days-

Counting down through all the

Advertisements and

Cards, through the

‘What am I going to get’s

14 days-

Sketch out paper hearts

Until my fingers bleed

And I paint with that;

13-12-11

Just that much closer ‘till

I can be myself again…

10 days-

240 hours until I have to

Pretend not to care

9, eight

They all have someone

And I don’t want anybody

So why does it still

Hurt?

7- This used to make me

Want to die…

Goddammit, just

One more week;

6-5-4-3

Waiting for it to be over

Taking drags on the candy cigarette

In front of the local

Convenience store

2- The night before

Lay out my clothes just like

Every other day,

Breathe in

1-judgement day- walking around

Watching them smile

Until

Zero- it’s finally

Over.

RESTART

…I miss you.