i don't usually feel this

alone.

it hurts to see
all of them with
boyfriends, and girlfriends,
and people that make them
smile.

you used to make me smile

and i know it's my own fault,
(i can't start loving anyone else
until i stop loving her first)
but i'm too scared to let go.

if i let go of
the one person who
has ever loved me
even close to the way
i love them,
then what am i left with?

part of me wants to move on,
because i know
we don't have the opportunity
to be together right now

part of me is holding back
because i love her
so much.

part of me is just scared
that i'll never find
a love like this
again.

but what's so good about
100 miles of separation,
and never holding her in your arms?